liverpoolsusie
09-09-2010, 09:38 PM
I dont now if this is the right place to post but I really do need help,
I am a newly registered childminder, but do havemy own children so by no means a novice,
I am minding two little ones at the moment and my own child, the older one who is 4 and just started school comes in every day and hits, kicks, elbows, bites and punches his way through the day constantly, I have tried talking to him, giving him time out and taking him to the house rules poster and reading to him telling him why he should not do these things but its not having any effect, he just screaches at me saying I dont have to listen to you, but mummy lets me or shut up and things like that, he says he doesnt like me because I shout at him, I dont at all I just tell him no thats not acceptable, but do seem to be doing this over and over again, the other day he said I wish you would die so I could get another childminder who doesnt tell me off for hitting and kicking, I have spoken to mum about this a few times but she is saying he is fine at home, or looks at me like it is me that is making him like this.
Today mum come and told me she had taken the day off to take him to and from school herself and she was going to the park afterwards so they could have some alone time as he was up in the night having nightmares ( this made me feel awful, she said he was crying there were monsters), she come back later to collect the other little boy and while she was talking to me she said oh no The older child was biting the little ones foot, next thing the little one screams and is crying and she just turned and said, oh that was too hard, not dont bite or that is wrong, then he run in got my two year old by the head and started dragging her around and mum just says oh dont do that all jolly and happy, now I am not wanting her to shout and scream but I really do not know what to do , is it me am I wrong to think she should be a bit more stern and tell him he should not bite and hit, I am all for positive parenting but when is it time to say No that is not acceptable? so sorry this is long and rambling, but I have been looking after him for 10 weeks and I wonder will he ever calm down or have I just got to say no this isnt working, thanks in advance.
I am a newly registered childminder, but do havemy own children so by no means a novice,
I am minding two little ones at the moment and my own child, the older one who is 4 and just started school comes in every day and hits, kicks, elbows, bites and punches his way through the day constantly, I have tried talking to him, giving him time out and taking him to the house rules poster and reading to him telling him why he should not do these things but its not having any effect, he just screaches at me saying I dont have to listen to you, but mummy lets me or shut up and things like that, he says he doesnt like me because I shout at him, I dont at all I just tell him no thats not acceptable, but do seem to be doing this over and over again, the other day he said I wish you would die so I could get another childminder who doesnt tell me off for hitting and kicking, I have spoken to mum about this a few times but she is saying he is fine at home, or looks at me like it is me that is making him like this.
Today mum come and told me she had taken the day off to take him to and from school herself and she was going to the park afterwards so they could have some alone time as he was up in the night having nightmares ( this made me feel awful, she said he was crying there were monsters), she come back later to collect the other little boy and while she was talking to me she said oh no The older child was biting the little ones foot, next thing the little one screams and is crying and she just turned and said, oh that was too hard, not dont bite or that is wrong, then he run in got my two year old by the head and started dragging her around and mum just says oh dont do that all jolly and happy, now I am not wanting her to shout and scream but I really do not know what to do , is it me am I wrong to think she should be a bit more stern and tell him he should not bite and hit, I am all for positive parenting but when is it time to say No that is not acceptable? so sorry this is long and rambling, but I have been looking after him for 10 weeks and I wonder will he ever calm down or have I just got to say no this isnt working, thanks in advance.