PDA

View Full Version : Feeling a tad disheartened :-(



MissTinkerbell
11-08-2010, 01:28 PM
I'm starting to feel all dispondent at the moment. Hubby is in the RAF and we found out in February that he'd made the grade for promotion but we just had to wait and see if he got called up.

I knew at this point I was taking on new mindees for September and wanted to know what to do - decided not to say anything in case it didn't happen - I think I posted a thread on here asking advice on what to do.

Anyway we heard nothing and he applied for another post in his office that would have allowed him to stay here for another 4/5 years. This would be good could sign up my 2 mindees and get the twins settled in school with no worries of uprooting them 3/4 months after they had started school.

However he's told me today that they have given the post to someone else and that he is 6 places off being promoted which means a posting somewhere else. The thing that annoys me the most is that they have sent him on loads of courses to do this job and he is now fully qualified to do it, yet they have brought someone in who would need to go and do all the training because they haven't done any of it - so a complete waster of money and both parts because no doubt hubby will have a completely different job where he won't use that training anymore.

Whilst I'm pleased that he will get promotion I just don't want to move - I have the perfect set up with my mindees - all 3 are term-time only and have delightful parents who I get on great with - I can't see me being as lucky somewhere else.

I also feel for the twins because I think that they are going to take a long while to settle in to school (took them a whole term to get used to preschool) and they will just get settled and I will have to uproot them.

I know that this is the life of a RAF wife but just feel sometimes that the powers that be do not take into account the wives and families and realise the upheaval it causes - not only do I lose my mindees but it means that they have got to find new childminders and as I have been the first in both cases its going to be unsettling for them too.

At the moment I could juust sit down and cry.

fluffysocks
11-08-2010, 02:13 PM
ah the delights of the powers that be, I too am and RAF wife and completely understand and have always said they should have women running it! those running the show have absolutely no common sense or consideration and the worst bit is there is ****** all we can do about any of it!

it sounds horrid but hopefully in the long run it'll do your own children good to get used to moving-its a part of their life, and your mindees really will be fine, you will always be a part of who they are, you have helped turn them into the children they are.

Try and think positive, the friends you havent yet got, the house you could have, the children you may encounter-sometimes a change works for the better.

Just take 5 minutes when you can and have a good cry, no point holding it is as it'll come sooner or later, best to let it flow.

x

moljak
11-08-2010, 02:13 PM
I really feel for you.Sending a big hug.

MissTinkerbell
11-08-2010, 02:38 PM
Try and think positive, the friends you havent yet got, the house you could have, the children you may encounter-sometimes a change works for the better.




Thank you

Trouble is 4 months ago I'd quite got used to the idea of moving as most of my friends I'd made here had all moved on and there was just me left. Hubby then said he'd applied for this new job and got the backing of his WO and the SWO and the Station Commander so got really hopeful about staying here.

I guess I shall be OK once I get used to the idea of moving again and as you say I just need to focus on the positives and think about new friends, children, oppoprtunities not yet made.

Ideally it would nice if we don't have to go until Jul/Aug next year so at least the children can start new school year in a new school rather than having to do it half way through the year. I have no concerns about my 7 year old settling into a new school but the twins are a different kettle of fish.

Oh well nothing I can do about it:laughing:

fluffysocks
11-08-2010, 03:15 PM
well if a posting comes up before then would you consider applying for hubby to work away and you stay put for the first bit and then move to new camp during hols? I know many people that have done it due to school placements and continuity of care. I'm sure your hubbys bosses will back your application, at the end of the day the RAF dont want to be seen making it harder for the families, you would just need to really lay it on thick with your reasoning. I know exactly what you mean though, 3/4 months ago i would have willing waivered any 90day rules and pack up and gone in a weekend if I could, now its my hubby with the old "itchy feet" and i am trying to delay him to see what happens on the promotion board early next year. I am not moving twice in two years if i dont have too!!!

chin up hun, x

MissTinkerbell
11-08-2010, 03:42 PM
well if a posting comes up before then would you consider applying for hubby to work away and you stay put for the first bit and then move to new camp during hols?

chin up hun, x

That might be a possibility because where he wants to go there are no 4 bed quarters available and they are moving people to a camp further north. If we got that one hopefully what would happen is that he would travel daily (he did it the other way round before we moved here) and then we move when a quarter did become available.

Rubybubbles
30-08-2010, 03:49 PM
just to give my empathy!

I have moved a bit over the past 3 years, but tbh I have found such a demand for childcare if you do move you should be okay:)

Let us now how you get on.

The Juggler
30-08-2010, 05:01 PM
sending a hug honx

Tina O
30-08-2010, 07:16 PM
Sending huge hugs, love and support to hard working RAF wives from an ARMY wife......who knows where you are coming from xx

Know how you feel, we are in 10th house, one son in 7th school other in 5th and I've childmind in 3 differnt areas!

You know the that the "powers that be" do not think of families and we just have to deal with it, so have a good cry, shout and feel royally p***ed off with it all and then do what you know you can, get on with it.... it's the life of a service wife, good luck, you never know it might just be better!

love and paryers xx