View Full Version : Advice but mostly a mini rant

26-03-2008, 11:17 AM
I have a 9 year old mindee with me today. He's missing school because his mum is having a procedure done at hospital. But here's the thing, she's having a D&C done and then a Mirena coil fitted (to ease menstruation and avoid hysterectomy). Yes, she's going under general anasthesia (mispelled!) but she's got her son so worked up he was too worried to go to school! For heaven's sake, I've had 3 D&Cs performed (miscarriages) and ony had a local anasethic for them and I had a Mirena coil fitted about a month ago with no pain relief at all. I'm not saying it wasn't a bit painful and that I didn't need a bit of rest but she's acting like she's having major surgery and that she could die. I've seen her "poor brave little soldier face" so many times these last few days that I have to bite my tongue to keep from smiling.

I know some people worry more about procedures and all but you don't lay that on your kid. I've seen her do this to him before several times , once when their cat died and another time to do with some relationship problems she'd been having. It's like he can't be a child because she needs him to take care of her emotional needs when she should be trying to be strong for his sake, poor guy. She's having the rest of the week off which is fair enough but she's talking about letting him stay off as well to look after her!!!:angry:

I really like this kid. He was a real handful when he first came to me, very sulky and disruptive if he felt he wasn't getting attention. He had the misfortune of starting with me the week of another child's birthday and I have pictures of it all with him in the background glowering because he wasn't in the limelight. He's a different boy now, though, bless him and we get on really well.

I dunno, not much I can do really except give him support when he's with me. Just needed to unload cos I'm feeling very irked.

26-03-2008, 11:21 AM
Of course you're feeling irked... what an irresponsible woman! You are left to pick up the pieces... not fair! :(

26-03-2008, 11:44 AM
Not fair on you and most certainly no:mad: on her son!

26-03-2008, 11:47 AM
I feel for you - not fair on her son at all.

Not much you can do though except be there for him as you are.

big hugs xx

26-03-2008, 12:13 PM
poor boy that aint fair - hes 9 not 29 he dont need have the stress of his mum and having look after her.. shes more than capiable im sure.
ive not had a c&c i opted for natural misscarriage ... and i still did everyday stuff.. even day after baby wasnt in me anymore tho i got told off by mates and family doc just said take it easy.

why does she have to make it hard for him tho he needs to be a kids thats him, dot reck him

ok ok i shut up lol

sit and talk to the boy hu see if he wants get anything off his chest as they say could really help him knowing you are there to listen.

26-03-2008, 01:34 PM
oh dear

hope he is ok

26-03-2008, 01:59 PM
I reckon that have a general is for wimps!! I have a friend who is a consultant anethatist, when she had hers fitted she had a general and the week off work to recover!!! when I had mine fitted I went straight back to work (had to admit it was painful). I just could believe that you would have a general for that procedure.


26-03-2008, 02:01 PM
He's alright. Playstation at the moment but we snuck over to the duck pond this morning to take advantage of the weather and after feeding the ducks, kicked a football around with my dd and my other little mindee. It was nice and relaxing. Came home, had lunch and now just chilling while lo naps.

She managed to squeeze out a text to him minutes before being taken to theatre. :rolleyes: Said "I'm getting ready to go now but just want you to know I love you and I'll be fine." :rolleyes:

26-03-2008, 02:32 PM
poor kid

my exsil is like that with her son my nephew he is 9 too but she forgets he's only young and texts him the most inappropriate messages really

she's having her boobs done in a couple of weeks and jake knows all about the whole procedure it's no wonder he can't socialise with that kind of knowledge

26-03-2008, 03:23 PM
Is a bit melodramatic isn't it.

I hope you all have a good afternoon

26-03-2008, 09:58 PM
Hope the little boy was ok ?

Angel xx

27-03-2008, 07:42 AM
He was calm and relaxed when he left me last night. I pick him up after school so I don't know yet whether he's being sent to school today. Guess I'll find out later. *sigh*

27-03-2008, 07:58 AM
Morning tatia

I can understand how you feel about the way this mum lays everything on her child - it is not right at all but there is nothing you can do about that.

I just think the child is lucky to have you - obviously you put things in perspective for him and help take his mind off what's happening like feeding the ducks and the relaxed game of football

I hope she doesn't keep him off school to "look after her" :rolleyes:

Miffy xx

27-03-2008, 04:26 PM
It all turned out better than I hoped. He's gone to school but Mum picked him up today and also tomorrow. She was fairly chipper and said it was better than she thought so looks like her dying swan routine has been averted. :D

I know I can't do or say anything because she is his mother after all. It's just funny how protective we start to feel about the little monkeys. :o

27-03-2008, 04:27 PM
Glad things were ok today

Angel xx