View Full Version : advise needed on mindee winding son up please

09-05-2010, 12:00 PM
i look after a 6yrold mindee who enjoys winding my son up and once he has found somthing that annoys him will do it constantly untill my son snaps then he thinks its funny, now normaly i would tell a child to ignore this behaviour but my son has 'problems' ie they think he is on the autistic scale but cant make up their minds, obviously this is no excuse for any behaviour and he is treated exactly the same as the others, but it does mean that he can be sensitive to things and has a short fuse.
friday the mindee was making silly noises, started off with humming, then clicking then just a one toned hum noise, each time my son said please stop its annoying so he would stop one noise then start another, when i asked him to stop he said 'so i cant sing then?' i said yes you can sing but not make noises, anway that afternoon after school he then sang songs, this started to annoy my son who moved in to the living room the mindee then followed him , so my son went outside, again the mindee followed him this time singing and laughing so obviously this was also to wind up my son.
Thing is how to I deal with this,, i cant really ask the mindee not to sing cause theres nothing wrong with singing, i also dont want to ask my son to stay upstairs all day so that the sining dosent anoy him,,, i did think that i could say to the mindee that if he wants to sing he has to sing in the kitchen then my son could play in the lounge but is this ok to do this?

09-05-2010, 12:16 PM
A 6 year old is old enough to know that he shouldn't upset another child in that way.

He is also old enough at 6 to understand about differences and that some of us react differently than others to certain things.

Singing songs is not wrong, but deliberately following a child into another room doing something that upsets him is very wrong and he is old enough to know that and to be told to stop.

I think he needs to have the distinction between singing songs and singing to irritate explained to him and to stop doing what he is doing.

My friend's son has aspergers and hates this kind of thing too... although he can also be the one making the silly noises :laughing:

Hugs to your son xx

09-05-2010, 12:29 PM
That is bad behaviour and very rude, I would deal with it the way I would deal with any other bad behaviour, what would you do if he was poking your son?

My son has aspergers and is very sensitive to that kind of thing, he would flip if he was followed like that. As Sarah says he is also often the one making the noises! We have an official quiet room. 95% of the time it is just a play room but if someone wants quiet then the rule is brought in that we have to be quiet in there. If people want to make irritating noises (or sing) then they can do so in the other room. Its really important he can have some quiet if he needs it and he shouldnt have to feel isolated.

09-05-2010, 05:01 PM
thanks folks, i was begining to think i was being petty with the singing thing, trouble is i know for a fact that the 6yrold will delibratly sing everyday he comes now just to be annoying but thats the way he is,
I have to say that my son can also make some funny noises but it dosent upset the other mindees or if it does they havent said anything. i like the idea of the quiet room but havent got another room for this but my upstairs is out of bounds so my son can go to his room for peace and quiet but i dont see why he should have to be up there all the time.
I do find it hard sometimes when the mindee is doing somthing 'normal' like singing which upsets my son cause its awkard to deal with