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maisiemog
05-05-2010, 09:25 AM
How do you deal with them???

My mindees are as good as gold....its my DD thats the problem at the moment! She doesn't like having to share mummy or her toys adn throws a tantrum at everything!

I've tried praising good behaviour, praising mindees good behaviour, ignoring it, distracting her and nothing seems to be working! I know she's a bit over tired at the moment cos she's teething again but I can't believe what a horrid child she is when I'm minding. It's like she has 2 personalities.. one when its just the two of us and one when I'm minding!

Any ideas on what I can do to deal with them before they escalate?

DIPPY DOUGHNUT
05-05-2010, 09:44 AM
i know how you feel, my 4 year old was the same.

It got that bad that she was lashing out at the mindee :mad:

I tried
1> The time out step
2> The quiet area- (a place she chose where she would get a cushion and sit down then once she had calmed down we would take about what happened and why etc)
3> Praising good behaviour, telling her off
4> more one on one timw with her
None of these worked
I spoke to her nursery about it and they said that they would never believe it was the same child i was talking about, they said she never shouts at another child let alone hit one.

So her key worker sat down with her and made a behaviour chart and explained that everyday she went with out getting cross or hitting then she could have a sticker (they let her choose the stickers to), and that they wanted to see it when it was complete.

When i went to get her she was so impressed with it, it was all she talked about. we came home put it on the wall and after 5 weeks she took it back to school and they showed the whole class how well she had done.

It was interesting for me to see that theres was a patteren as to which days she did and didnt get them. Which helped me with my planning of activities.

Now i tell her that she is a big girl and doesnt need one anymore and if she does get cross or goes to hit then she gets put in the quiet area and then says sorry of her own acord which seems to be working now.

She is alot more clam and instead of lashing out daily its been once in 3 weeks. Hope this helps:D

Pipsqueak
05-05-2010, 10:56 AM
I have one right back at them!!! lol

seriously though, ignore ignore ignore - no eye contact, no comment apart from when you are ready to be calm/nice we'll play again - I'd just walk away, taking some toys elsewhere. Obviously ensure DD is safe but carry on ignoring. the second she starts be totally pre-occupied with something else.

angeldelight
06-05-2010, 07:35 AM
Hope things calm down for you soon

Think we have all been in this situation

Good luck

Angel xx

MissTinkerbell
06-05-2010, 11:50 AM
My DD2 was the expert in tantrums and the only thing I found that worked was to ignore her completely until she got out of it. One she had lasted 2 and a half hours.

Now at 4 she is the most patient and placid little girl ever - you wouldn't think that 2 years ago she was the devil:laughing:

Tinglesnark
06-05-2010, 12:58 PM
i am struggling with this too - my 3 year old seems to spend all day every day screaming blue murder...

i get so fed up that i end up shouting back which i know doesnt help :blush: must try the sticker chart though!
good luck op - i hope it works for you too!

sarah707
06-05-2010, 05:28 PM
different children respond to different things.

My 2 were never much into sticker charts but if I ignored them and went off to do something fun they would perk up and come for a nosey :D