Bit of a dilema.......

[SammyM]

My ds has been invited to a party in the easter hols at a soft play place, BUT its my first day of childminding another little boy (he is in my sons yr at school but I'm pretty sure he wouldn't have been invited to this party) What would be the correct ettiquette here??? Should I

A) Take ds to the party, with mindee but explain that he's not invited and can't have party food / bags etc (in a nicer way though!!)

B) Find someone else to take my son - seems a bit harsh on him though?

Also, would I be expected to pay the mindees entrance fee??

Help - I need the voice of experience please!!

[jelly15]

I would take him and pay entrance fee, and put together a simple party bag of your own to give him. Just explain the situation to the birthay boys parents, they will surely understand.

[angeldelight]

I would take him and pay entrance fee, and put together a simple party bag of your own to give him. Just explain the situation to the birthay boys parents, they will surely understand.

I think I would do the same

That way no one misses out

Angel xx

[singlewiththree]

My ds has been invited to a party in the easter hols at a soft play place, BUT its my first day of childminding another little boy (he is in my sons yr at school but I'm pretty sure he wouldn't have been invited to this party) What would be the correct ettiquette here??? Should I



I've got the same problem Weds evening mindee hasn't been invited so I've arranged a friend to take DD until mindee has left me and then I will go to the party. I just felt there may have been another reason why the child hasn't invited mindee maybe they really can't stand each other and I wouldn't like it if a child that my child hadn't invited came along. Plus at meal times my DD would have to go upstairs to the party room and I would stay down with mindee. I just decided rather than risk upsetting anyone it was safer for my friend to take DD.

[amirose]

To be honest I wouldn't take the mindee.
If I was the parents of the birthday boy and you said you were going to bring him and provide his own party bag, pay entry etc I would feel AWFUL!!! :panic: BUT I would also need to respect the birthday boys wishes over who he has chosen to invite :(
Of course it may be mum has said invite say 10 special friends and its as simple as that but how could you know?
Very good point about the party room singlewiththree too - at some point they are all going to go off into the party room then what?

I would let someone else take my son, he will be having a great time at the party and I am sure he won't mind. You don't say how old your son is but you may be able to explain you don't want mindee to be sad etc

[loocyloo]

do you have to stay with your DS? does he know the parents of the birthday child, or will another mum he does know be staying? i find at soft play parties (or any other time i go to soft play, i don't see the children from the moment i arrive to when we leave!:D )

i wouldn't take the minded child along, as others have said. not fair to DS, birthday child or minded child. just explain that you are dropping DS off to a party and you and he will go and do XYZ. my own children go to parties, friends for tea etc whilst i am working, and minded children don't go unless invited, even if they share some of the same friends.

in answer to paying for mindee...
if i take any minded children to soft play or wherever, i pay the entrance fee (and put it through my books)

[Tippy Toes]

I would do the same as jelly 15, when my son (4) is invited to birthday parties I always take my little daughter who is 2. No one ever seems to mind, the more the merrier! She is sometime given a party bag too as some children dont turn up!

[Zoomie]

don't know how old your own child is, but if you can't leave him or ask a friend to take him, then I would ask the birthday child parents if they minded you bringing mindee and that you will sort out his own enterance / meal separate to the party children. that is what i have done with my own children.

[Rubybubbles]

Iould take mindie along if there you are not able to leave your own child at the party. I have done this with my own children, but we stay on the 'party table' but don't go into the party room

[balloon]

I don't think you should take the mindee unannounced either but on the other hand it's a public place (I presume it's not being closed for the party?)...

Why not either get a friend to take your child along, or give the mum who's throwing the party a call and explain the situation and see what she suggests?

[babs]

when my son had his b/day party in a soft play centre ( quite a while a go ) all parents dropped and ran:laughing: :laughing: .....
i wudnt of minded if someone had asked if xx cud join as they had him and cudnt leave him, but if u can just drop and run do that and go do something with mindee while party is on . Or speak to parents they may just say yeh sure bring along ...

[SammyM]

My ds is 5 so its a stay and play type party, the play place is huge and as its in the holidays I'm sure it will be quite busy. I like the idea of doing a little party bag myself to give to the mindee. Don't really know the parents other than a quick hello in the playground, but I think I'll just have a quick word just to explain why he'll be there, I don't want it to sound like I'm trying to wrangle an invitation tho - at £12 a head I can understand numbers are limited.

Thanks for the advice ladies xx

[Mouse]

If it's a huge place I think you can get away with taking mindee with you, after all, he could have been there with his parents anyway. When it comes to food, party games, cake etc, just keep the mindee with you.

When my children were younger & we had that sort of party, younger siblings of the invited children would often come along. They'd all play together, but at specific party times, the siblings don't join in. I never minded, though I did get annoyed one time when a mum tried to get 2 of her other children to join in the food. The staff asked me if I wanted to pay for 2 extras & I'm afraid I said no! They were really good & told mum she'd have to take them away from the party area. I did feel bad, but wasn't prepared to pay an extra £20 just for her kids to eat :blush:

[SammyM]

PANIC OVER!!!

After days of trying to work this out in my head, I've just found out the mindee HAS been invited, so everyone is happy!!!!

What a flippin worry over nothing!

[babs]

cool so it all worked out in the end, why do we worry so much?