View Full Version : swearing child!

Dippy bird
12-02-2010, 02:24 PM
I have only just started childminding,and I have got a small child who is almost three.When her parents came to see me,her father warned me that her and her older brother are going through a swearing stage.I was fine and said I would keep an eye out for it.Anyway,the first week was fine,no swearing at all. This week,she decided that she wanted to slap me in my face,I told her that we didn't hit people and that her hitting me made me sad.She continued to try and slap me, so I gently held her hands away from my face so that she couldn't do it again. She then came out with a word that really shocked me :eek: . I chose to ignore it and turned away from her-she said it again,but I didn't react. Was I right not to give her a reaction? I did tell her dad and he said that they tell her not to say rude words (clearly not worked).I found with my kids when they were that age that by reacting to them made it worse. What do you do?

Lady Haha
12-02-2010, 02:32 PM
I'm no expert, but I think I would do as you have done and not react. She obviously enjoys the attention/reaction she gets when she swears at home and is now trying it with you. So, no attention/reaction = no swearing I think!

Good luck!

12-02-2010, 02:34 PM
you did the right thing

maybe if this continues you ened to tell her that you do not like that word and would prefer it if she did not use it in your home again

perhaps set up a behaviour chart with simple rules such as being nice using nice words like please and thankyou and doing simple tasks like helping to put toys away

make sure you fully document it word time date and the incident that led to the usae of the word such as blah blah then she slapped me on the face, no witnesses were present write down how you handled that too

ensure you cover your back 100% and always get parents to sign the incident reports too

12-02-2010, 04:00 PM
Like Shelly says get it all down on paper along with how you have handled it and keep parents informed.

I've had a swearing child before and while it is shocking, to the child it's words they have heard somewhere else rather than used with malice.

I find if I refuse to be shocked they tend to stop. :D

12-02-2010, 04:23 PM
I think you're right not to react for now and hopefully it will be short-lived

Document it, together with what led up to the swearing and get parents to sign it.

Don't know if you have any other mindees but obviously you won't want them to hear bad language, so, if it does continue then you would have to decide what else to do.

Miffy xx

12-02-2010, 05:27 PM
I would make sure you document everything and inform the parents of everything and make them sign it. I've had exactly the same thing in the past and lets just say it all came out that things weren't happy families at home. Sure all fine but you have to think about where could the behaviour have been learnt from.

12-02-2010, 06:38 PM
Hi Dippy bird :),
Sorry you've had this happen today, but try not to worry. You have high standards and with patience and a bit of time, the lo will learn to behave as you expect her to. Believe it and its more likely to happen I think...
i think you did right to ignore it. In your situation I'd keep a note of what happened, the time, circumstances leading up to it etc and write up any future occurences. I'd be more concerned about the hitting myself, than the swearing and probably use a time out for that if it happens again. If it continues, you will probably need to talk to the parents about behaviour you expect in you rsetting and suggest a meeting to agree behaviour management that can be used in both places...?

hope it all settles down soon :)

best wishes,
Wendy :)