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polly0
29-01-2010, 11:50 AM
Can anybody offer any advice please: I look after a 7 and 11 year old before and after school and holidays. Every morning when they come they walk through the door and completely ignore me:angry: even though i say Good Morning more than once. Anyway, this morning we got to school and the 7 year old keeps walking off with his sister so this morning i told him to come back to the car and wait for me which he did in a huff:mad: when we got into the school playground he went off and stood with his sister and all the year sixes, so i asked another mindee to go over and tell him to come back to me. He said NO:angry: at this point i had all the year sixes staring at me and he was hiding behind his sister so i walked over and marched him to where i was stood with year sixes probably calling me every name under the sun:(

Anyway tonight i was going to have a word with his dad about his behaviour, i dont mind if he wants to go off with his sister in the playground but he doesnt come back and just walks straight into school and i dont know wether hes gone in or not.

How would you deal with this???

wendywu
29-01-2010, 12:03 PM
Make him hold your hand, they hate that.

I have done that with one of my 6 year ol who ran off in the playground. He did not do it again :laughing:

polly0
29-01-2010, 12:07 PM
Thanx Wendywu, would you have a word with dad, he seems to think the sun shines out of them both even though he knows that the lad is really naughty. Even when hes been a bit of a pain iv always dealt with it and just told dad that hes been fine, i really think i need to be more direct with him. Its hard to have a conversation when the children are stood there, i was going to tell him to put the children in the car and come back and have a chat

Ripeberry
29-01-2010, 12:09 PM
How come you look after children over the age of 10yrs old. Most minders I know don't touch them with a bargepole when they turn 10yrs old :D
He is just trying to be cool in front of his mates :cool:

madredann
29-01-2010, 12:10 PM
This is difficult but perhaps he is embarrased (or perhaps just down right rude)what do his friends do when they are dropped off. Have you explained that you need to see him before he goes in perhaps a wave or raised hand where you can see him. You must speak to dad about this it is the last thing you need to deal with. Is dad aware at all of what is going on? I would stop them at the door and say look at me I said good morning try and get eye contact.
I would tell the boy you are going to talk to dad and as you said put them in car and speak to dad ... making him hold your hand might do more damage and mean less respect for you, although you would know where he is might not be the answer

sarah707
29-01-2010, 12:16 PM
Younger children stand with me until it's time to go in, then we go in together...

Older ones when in the juniors get a bit more freedom - they can go and stand with their friends but I need to know when they are going in so they come over and tell me.

So long as they play the game then I am laid back about it but if they disappear one day, the next few they can stand with me again.

it's about safety at the end of the day isn't it? If you don't feel what the child is doing is safe then you must take action.

hth :D

polly0
29-01-2010, 12:25 PM
Thanx for your replies, I would definitely NOT look after 11 year olds again. When she gets out of the car she just walks off, never says see you later, NOTHING even though I say bye, have a nice day. They are both rude and I think very use to getting their own way. I have explained to him about coming back and saying "bye, i'm going in now" but it just doesnt register at all.
Dad said this morning could i make sure he brings his jumper home, his homework and his reading book:eek: He is 7 and i think he should be remembering these things himself

The Juggler
29-01-2010, 02:09 PM
for now, with the 7 year old can you tell him you will give him the freedom to go play/stand with his sister as long as he comes back for his bag and to say goodbye so you can watch him through the door safely. Tell him he has one chance to show you he can be trusted.

tell Dad what you are doing also.

It might work then again....

wendywu
29-01-2010, 02:19 PM
Thanx Wendywu, would you have a word with dad, he seems to think the sun shines out of them both even though he knows that the lad is really naughty. Even when hes been a bit of a pain iv always dealt with it and just told dad that hes been fine, i really think i need to be more direct with him. Its hard to have a conversation when the children are stood there, i was going to tell him to put the children in the car and come back and have a chat



I would mention it, but not in a seroius big deal way. More in a.. i have to make sure he gets into school safely and this is how i have dealt with it, way.

Parents dont like to be worried and like to think you have it all under control. :D