mindee ran off!! [Archive] - Childminding Forum

charliegee

02-12-2009, 01:46 PM

hello all

I've got a mindee who is new and who is in reception

today whilst we were on the school run she ran off (in a busy playground) totally unexpected and was difficult as I had three other mindees with me today!

I'm very concious of hte fact that children should always be in sight / earshot and although it was only seconds.....I couldn't see her and naturally in the busy playground I couldn't specifically hear her. - never mind having other younger mindees with me!

I saw her seconds later...went up to her and explained the need to stay near and she said "dad lets me play"

what should I have done - should I address it with dad

have I done something wrong not letting child always be technically in sight / hearing

(am paranoid !!)

sorry to be a drama queen but any help greatly appreciated!

x

Lady Haha

02-12-2009, 02:00 PM

Everyone probably has different ways of doing things! Personally, I let my mindees run off inthe playground as its not that big and I can stand by the gate to make sure they don't escape! I can't see/hear them the entire time, but I do watch them as much as poss, I don't stand chatting to others mums etc.

They all leave their book bags with me in a little pile and then I know that no one has gone in without me knowing when the bell goes!

Mouse

02-12-2009, 02:07 PM

I would explain to the parents that you cannot have mindee running off in the playground & you'd appreciate them backing you up. Explain that they might not mind as they only have their own child to watch, but that when you are with several children you need to keep them all close & can't do that if she runs off. At reception age she should be old enough to understand that she will be allowed to run off if dad is with her, but not when she's with you.

When I'm waiting for my daughter to come out of school, my 3yr old mindee stays with me. When he's with his mum collecting his sister, he runs all over the place. He understands the difference between being with me & being with his mum. We often go to school a bit earlier so he can have a run on the field before it gets busy, but he knows to come back to me when I say.

If she really does want to play, is there a quieter area where she could have a bit of freedom, but still be close to you?

Blackhorse

02-12-2009, 02:17 PM

I would just explain to the child that when she is out with you she needs to follow what you say and if it means staying close then that is what she will haev to do.

I would not yet tell parents to change what they do with her her at the playground. I would only do this once I am sure that mindee will not changer her behaviour after I tried talking to her about it..iyswim.

I believe they are prefectly capable of knowing that if they are with you that they have some additional rules to follow.....

TheBTeam

02-12-2009, 02:19 PM

I don't let any of mine away from me in the mornings, i need to make sure that they all go into school without hassle as I have to get back to meet other mindees at home fairly quickly.

After school I let them play but I have to be able to see or hear them, it is a requirement and no matter how safe I thought the playground was I would not want to take a risk as it is open to anybody, they could fall and I would not know how etc. Mindees unfortunately have to learn that we are not their parents and can not take the same risks as their parents may do and that this is how they have to be with us, this is something that even the little ones pick up on fairly quickly.

I would tell the little girl that this is how it has to be when she is with you and I am sure without too much hassle she will understand that you need to keep her safe so Mummy and Daddy can come and get her.

buildingblocks

02-12-2009, 02:26 PM

In our school playground there is a wooden shelter with seats. I sit inside on the seat and the children are allowed to play on the inside or outside of the shelter and not go any further. They are made aware that if they go away from the shelter then they will not be allowed to play but will have to sit next to me until the classes go in. They all wear Hi Viz jackets as this makes it easier to see them unfortunately more and more children are wearing these.

I have had the it's not fair and mum lets us. But from the minute children start with me and are old enough to understand we have the conversation of mummy/daddy rules and Kate's rules. This way they know what is acceptable with parents and at home is possibly different when they are with me but they are not made to feel that I feel parents are wrong because their rules are different if tat makes sense.

sarah707

02-12-2009, 06:14 PM

I never let the children go off in the playground - there are too many other people around and it's too busy.

It's a safeguarding nightmare! :eek:

They stand with me and hold onto the buggy until everyone has come out.

One child is used to mum letting her go off and play - she learnt very quickly that I need her to stay by me and now if she sees someone she wants to greet, she will ask me first.

If you are going to let them go off, you need to risk assess how you would deal with them... going missing, going out of your sight, leaving with someone else, falling and hurting themselves while unsupervised, being hurt by another child, going behind a building, deciding to go off to the loo without telling you, chasing with other children and head bumping... those sorts of things.

Hth :D

mushpea

02-12-2009, 06:37 PM

all of mine know that they must stay with me and that they must not go out the school gates or park gates without me being there,, there is an area where i let one go and play in the mornings but its behind were i stand and i can see him,
if you want her to stay with you then i would just explain to her that when shes with you she has to stay by your side as thats your rules but when shes with dad she can run off as thats his rules.

igglepiggle

02-12-2009, 06:40 PM

I agree with Sarah. I think when it is your own child (and I don't know as mine is only 10 months!) and if you only have the one child at school, there's possibly no harm in letting them do a bit of after school 'socialising' but I think that when you are looking after 1 or more child that is not your own it's just not worth the risk. I tell my schoolie that I rely on him, as the oldest and most responsible, to help me out with the younger ones (yes - I flatter his ego!!!). I find myself saying things like 'I just don't know what I'd do without you, you're such a big help showing the others how nicely we can walk' and so on. He holds on to the side of the pushchair and the couple of times he has forgotten ( I know mum lets him run off on the days she gets him), I just remind him of our golden goals and ask him to tell me which one he has broken. They get a treat at the end of the day for observing our golden goals.

Lady Haha

02-12-2009, 09:00 PM

I'm obviously in the minority here then!!!:laughing:

Seriously though, I have risk assessed letting them go off and play. Theres no way they could get past me on the gate either on their own or with someone! As for falling and hurting them self, well, that could happen anywhere at any time, at the park for instance! So far, we haven't had any accidents and I haven't lost any one!

charliegee

02-12-2009, 11:24 PM

nokidshere

03-12-2009, 09:21 AM

going to say that as in the good advise given....LO must go by my rules when with me ahhhhh safeguarding can be so difficult when parents are 100% on board.....honestly......:panic:

Personally I don't see what the parents have to do with it. My house my rules as with everything. Even if the parent backs up the child they still aren't going to be allowed to do it so not a lot of point getting into a discussion about it.

youarewhatyoueat

03-12-2009, 11:09 AM

Our school gates open at 8.40am and once the children are on school premises the responsibility lies with the school as at out school the playground is supervised by a teacher, school starts at 8.50am.
Why not change your contracted time so the responsibility lies with the school, dad should be happy with that.
At our school most parents don't stay anyway in the morning, they see them past the school gates and then theyre off, the whole point of being in the playground early is so they can have some exercise before having to sit down for the day, they need to run around.
Our school is only small so maybe different to yours.

Mollymop

03-12-2009, 12:13 PM

I let the children go off and play in the playground in the mornings and afterschool - if they are school age. All under 5's stay with me. But I can see the children that are playing and they all play together.

But that's me and not you.

Have a word with the child tell her that she has to play right near you, you are not her dad and you have to do things differently than him because you have lots of other children to look after as well.

Mollymop

03-12-2009, 12:17 PM

Hi all...thanks for your replys

spoke with dad at pick up who was very not bothered at all!!
:mad:

I explained my duty to have children in eye/ ear shot and he said "I don't see the problem if x wants to play?"

very difficult......:(

I've risk assessed the playground (thanks for the good advise - had done a school run RA but now updated to include this incident)

not sure what else I can do

going to say that as in the good advise given....LO must go by my rules when with me

ahhhhh safeguarding can be so difficult when parents are 100% on board.....honestly......:panic:

I would be saying to Dad, "Well none of the other children are allowed to run off and play while in my care, so it is not fair to tell XX to do as she pleases in the playground. She has to stand with me so I can see where she is, if I let all the children run off and play in the mornings I would never be able to keep my eye on all of them"

If you don't want to let the child run off and play, then don't. Your rules!:)