View Full Version : Cheeky Question

01-11-2009, 11:53 AM
Can I ask how many of you childmind without having children of your own, or have children that have grown and flown the nest? I fall into the latter of the two categories and recently have got quite fed up of people assuming that I should have stopped childminding by now. :( I have had so many negative comments about how childminders should have little ones of their own and I should find a 'proper' job now that I no longer have to be at home for my own child (he is 20 and just left home), my OH feels this way too. :mad: I get it constantly from family, especially as I now only have a couple of after schoolers, I must admit I did think of giving up earlier this year when I lost 3 children from the same family (they moved away), but after having 8 months off during the daytime, I am missing having little ones around the house. I suppose what I am asking is, am I as 'weird' (their words not mine), as friends and family seem to think I am? :blush:

01-11-2009, 11:57 AM
I don't find it strange at all, you carry on doing what you love :thumbsup:

01-11-2009, 12:00 PM
I fully intend to carry on childminding when my 2 have left home. :D

01-11-2009, 12:04 PM
i am single and dont have my own children, always been a nanny up to a year ago. most of the childminders i know have grown up children, some have left home. and a couple of them are grandmas. its not unusual. you enjoy being with young children, you are good at your job so there shouldnt be a problem!

01-11-2009, 12:09 PM
I dont see the problem! This is the job you love doing and it earns you an income - what wrong with that?!?!

01-11-2009, 12:32 PM
I have 2 friends that are childminders. They got into it when their children when they were little and now they have grown up and moved out. It still suits them and they continue to do it.

I think its because childminding is something people assume you get into to be with your own children. Most of us do but then we find we enjoy it and want to continue. There's not many people that can say they enjoy their jobs!!!:D

If you were working in a nursery or preschool, no one would question why you wanted to work there - they would just assume you wanted to work with children. But they would accept this more than childminding as you would be going OUT to work. Does that make sense?

My children are 12 and 9 and I did consider only doing it til my daughter left primary school. But to be honest, I cant see me stopping. I LOVE the freedome I have and the fun I have with the kids - and I get paid for it!!! And I dont think I could go back into a work "place" and have someone TELL me what hours I do, what work I should be doing etc.:D

So I think I will still be doing it when my children are older and flown the nest!!

01-11-2009, 12:59 PM
oops, sorry!
I do intend to retire in the next 12 months, as eldest DD is 25 and so we've had cots, car seats, toys etc around the house for 25 yrs!
DH retires from the police in aug next year, but will continue to work in his specialised field, which hopefully means I can retire and become a lady of leisure!


01-11-2009, 01:13 PM
I don't intend to stop. I was a nanny before a childminder and am happy to continue for as long as it suits me. My kids are 15 and 13 now and I still love having the littlies with me. See no reason to waste all my experience, that's priceless as they say.:)

It changes as the years go on as my own don't need all the buggies/baby toys etc now, but having moved to a bigger house recently, we now have a playroom for me in the day which becomes a games room for my 2 in the evenings and weekends.

As Helen said if we worked in nurseries no one would question it.

01-11-2009, 01:24 PM
Mine have grown up too , youngest is nearly 15.
A friend asked me why don't you get a proper job now? She's a classroom assistant.
I replied ' I'd love to work in a nursery or be a classroom assistant but I just couldn't afford the pay cut ' :laughing:
She shut up then :thumbsup:

Pudding Girl
01-11-2009, 01:53 PM
I don't have children living at home either, in fact when I came to Cming I didn't I did it because I wanted to do it and intend to do it till I retire (or get foster carer approval) :)

Nobody has ever commented on the lack of young children. in fact I think it's worked quite in my favour as people know I do this from choice, not just fallen into it to do so I can be with my children and not pay childcare.

I do sometimes wish I had an extra room in which I could work from though as it no longer looks like my home really.

01-11-2009, 02:08 PM
Thanks everyone, you have made me feel so much better. There is a childminder near me who is now a grandma and doesn't really enjoy doing it anymore, but she is full, so just keeps cutting her hours down as and when she can, she only keeps doing it as she looks after her grandchildren as well.

I wish I could say I was doing it for the money, but sadly that is not true as at the moment I am only earning around £200 a month, but I have had my good days over the years when I have been earning very good money, so you take the rough with the smooth and I am ever hopeful I will start to fill up again soon. Trouble is we need the money as OH is on short hours at work and I feel as though I am being pressured into moving in a direction I don't want to go.

I love childminding, it offers me the chance to do something I love, get paid for it and have the freedom to go places if I want to, allbeit with kiddies in tow, but at least I can if I want to which most people can't do.

I suppose I have just got fed up of people telling me to get a proper job now that my DS has left, but to be honest, apart from childminding I don't have any qualifications, apart from the normal CSE's, O'levels and a C&G but these are so out of date they are of no real use to me anymore, so unless I wanted to work in Tesco's (WHICH I DON'T) then I would have to re-train, I would still want to work with children and at 44 I can't see the point, I would have loved to teach but by the time I have done all my qualifications I would be coming up for 50, which I think is pushing it a bit for starting in a new career.

Sorry for moaning, I just think I needed to get it off my chest with people who understand, I really miss having a childminding support group in our area. :(

01-11-2009, 02:10 PM
I am single and dont any of my own children, I have worked with children since I was 16 :thumbsup:

David Sheppard
01-11-2009, 02:38 PM
I only began AFTER they left ;)



P.S. I'm sick of people inferring this isn't a proper job too. :angry:

01-11-2009, 03:08 PM
I started when my youngest child went off to nursery, that was in 1991. All my children have left home but i'm still minding :) and love it.

01-11-2009, 04:09 PM
I have only just started minding, I am 40 and my DSs are 17 and 14. I have always wanted to be my own boss and of course I love kids so it seemed sensible to become a CM.

I haven't thought about what others think, except the parents and they seem happy. Infact I wish I done it years ago, well so far anyway.:thumbsup:

01-11-2009, 04:18 PM
I have been childminding for 14 years and have none of my own. I trained and worked as a Nanny 30 odd years ago but had to give that up when I married as no-one had live-out nannies then! After having worked in offices for 14 years without a break (apart from holidays!) and having been made redundant three times I decided to become a childminder as I had always loved working with children and my ex and I were planning on starting a family.

When we split up and that was no longer on the cards everyone assumed I would go out and get a 'proper' job too! It was very frustrating, but I am still minding 11 years later, though I might have to find a part-time job as I only have one under 5 at the moment and she is only 2 full days a week now she has started nursery. Maybe that would be an option for you too?

01-11-2009, 04:25 PM
My kids are 17 and 25 and I still love childminding.
Years ago my hubby said he couldnt wait till I got a proper job!!!!!!:angry:
But we have to teach the children so many things on their learning journey before nursery/school. He now understands my job is an important one and I plan to continue childminding for many years (I have been a childminder for 22+ years!!)
Keep going you are not alone

Carol xxxx

sue m
01-11-2009, 04:40 PM
My sons left home many years ago, they are 34 and 38. I started minding in 1987 and love it, I only work part time now.

01-11-2009, 04:55 PM
Once again thanks, I am going to get my OH to read this thread. ;) He does know that I work hard at it and there is a lot more to it than at first seems, but I think it is the fact that I don't have much of an income at the moment that is bothering him.

I totally agree David it winds me up too when people keep saying that childminding isn't a 'proper' job. I have to live with it though as my OH says it, my DS says it and my mum and other family members do too. We have had many arguements over it in the past and when the money was coming in nobody ever made a comment, but now all of a sudden I have no children and it's not a proper job anymore. :mad:

01-11-2009, 05:02 PM
I have been childminding for 30 yrs now :eek: my children are 34 & 37 and i have no plans to retire yet . :thumbsup:

Its surprising how many people assume they are my grandchildren though !!!

01-11-2009, 05:07 PM
Don´t let anyone stop you from childminding if it´s what you want to do. I have no children of my own yet and im childminding. I enjoy working from home and when i do have kids it will be even better and im there for them and not having to chance putting them into childcare, etc.
Go for it!!!

01-11-2009, 05:09 PM
I have two younger children, but I work closely with another minder whose children are in their 20's and she is my age, she is continuing and enjoys her job.

If things continue broadly as they are, I can not see me giving up and going to get a 'proper' job when my children grow up, because I can earn without having to leave my house and I think this is a big advantage, I also can not think that I would want to go back to having a boss over my head again, no matter how senior I was!

01-11-2009, 05:48 PM
I've worked in offices for over 20 years. All my children are grown up and I decided I wanted to spend some time with my Grandchildren after missing out on so much by working through my childrens childhood. So I decided to become a Childminder - AND I'M THE BEST BOSS I'VE EVER HAD :laughing: :laughing:

01-11-2009, 05:50 PM
i dont have any children of my own
i was a nanny for 9 years but as they grew up and didnt need me as much i decided to childmind plus i can carry on working when i have children of my own

01-11-2009, 06:14 PM
I intend to carry on until my little darlings have flown the nest and beyond that.
If you enjoy your job then you should carry on. Dont take any notice of others, they are jealous because we have the best job in the world:jump for joy:

01-11-2009, 07:28 PM
My mam has been a childminder since 1983 and is still happy minding and is full.

My sister and I have both left home and have our own children and have followed in mams footsteps both now CMs. My brother is still at home but at 26 hes not a child.

01-11-2009, 08:42 PM
I started minding 25 years ago when my youngest of two girls was 2 so she is now 27 and my eldest (still at home is 34) I can't imagine not childminding anymore and is the only reason I am on the waiting list for the NVQ3 because I want to carry on for a long time yet and you need it by 2015. Don't take notice of what other people say, I wonder if they enjoy their work as much as us. I would'nt want to work with 'grown ups' again.

The Juggler
01-11-2009, 08:57 PM
I don't think it's weird at all. i know lots of minders with grown up children and on the forum have met many single and married minders with no children.

For me, personally, I think I may move to a different childcare arena when my kids are in high school. I don't want to leave childcare or childminders but I DO want my house back.

That's just a personal thing and I take my hat off to all of you who've had cots in the house for 25 years!:clapping: :clapping:

01-11-2009, 09:49 PM
Haven't started yet (hopefully soon though!) but I have no Children and no plans to have any for a while!

I think it is nice that you Childmind even though you have no young Children of your own-shows dedication and love for the job.

Keep on doing it-don't worry what people say!!

My OH (who def does not want Children yet) was a bit baffled when I told him I wanted to become a CM, but now he is really supportive.
I know I am lucky as I think it can be harder for Partners to accept the job when there is no Children of your own at home. They don't always understand why we would want to be looking after other peoples Children lol. That is fair enough though if they want a bit of peace and quiet at home :laughing: :laughing:


02-11-2009, 07:56 AM
Ah well on that one I am very lucky. I have an annexe off the main house that i childmind from and can just shut the door on it at the end of the day. :thumbsup: Was thinking of moving into the main house but have changed my mind now, too much hassle with ofsted and as OH works shifts it is ideal.
I have no intention of giving up, just hoping I get some children soon though as it is really hard at the moment. It is lovely to hear of people who have been going 20+ years. :)

02-11-2009, 01:38 PM
AND I'M THE BEST BOSS I'VE EVER HAD :laughing: :laughing:

:laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

I find this too - I have a hospital appointment tomorrow and had no trouble asking for the day off!!:laughing:

02-11-2009, 11:35 PM
Mine have grown up too , youngest is nearly 15.
A friend asked me why don't you get a proper job now? She's a classroom assistant.
I replied ' I'd love to work in a nursery or be a classroom assistant but I just couldn't afford the pay cut ' :laughing:
She shut up then :thumbsup:

LOVE IT!!!!:clapping: :laughing: :D :thumbsup:

04-11-2009, 02:42 PM
I have no children of my own and I am 45 so not someone hoping to start a family like many of the CM's who do not have children (actually that bit is not true but is looking less likely every year - hope that makes sense).

I worked for 20 years as a nanny and then went to a nursery when they brought in the minimum wage and the family I worked for couldn't afford to pay me that (and I was happy with what I was being paid). I spent three months in a nursery and hated it after the freedom of being a nanny and which is why I went into childminding 6 and a half years ago. I have every intention of carrying on until I retire as well as I love my job.

As for those people (my in laws for a start) who think I should get a proper job I tell them I earn more than my hubby (well until recently). I also work a damn site harder than a lot of people in a 'proper job'.

You stick to your guns and keep doing a brilliant job. I am lucky my hubby knows why I love this job and supports me wholeheartedly. he has even registered in his own right so if he is ever made redundant then he can do it full time. If you ever feel like you do not know what to do there is a wonderful piece of writing on my website about being a childminder that was written by a friend of a friend.If eve r I have a abd day I read that and remember why I love this job.

One of the downsides is having to do what I have just done which is waking a heavily sleeping child ready for his mum coming to pick him up.

mandy moo
04-11-2009, 04:56 PM
Although I live in smallish sized village we have quite a few childminders,
off the top of my head the 9 inc me that I can think of, 5 have grown up children and are still minding.

And as for a 'proper job' what is their definition of a 'proper' job?
Oh these sort of comments make me so angry, although my husband is the main breadwinner, my 'wages' help pay our bills etc
So I wouldnt take any notice if i were you.

05-11-2009, 08:30 AM
P.S. I'm sick of people inferring this isn't a proper job too. :angry:

URRG! Me Too!

And i also have zero kiddies of my own. Its a job, and i LOVE it! (most of the time :blush: )

:jump for joy: