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twinkle3005
19-10-2009, 08:38 PM
Sorry this is a long one

I've looked after 3 siblings for 11 days in all over the last 6 weeks. Now Mum has reported me to Ofted, Early Years and Social Services saying that I have let her 3 year old play out unsupervised. It's the Gran who collects them that has told the mum this. The Mum rang me this morning to say she wanted me to have the children one day a week instead of two because the Gran wants to have them the other day. I said I'd have to think about it as I wasn't sure I wanted to carry on looking after them if the Gran was going to say untrue things. She had pulled up to collect the children whilst we were tidying away the toys that had been outside. I was in and out of the house with the children so had asked my husband to stand at the window and wait for the Gran and keep an eye on the children coming in and out with me. When I've rang the Mum and she's now saying the older child who's 8 is telling her that I leave her and my 7 year old daughter to look after the 3 year old when they're out playing. I have asked them not to take her off the drive and that as big girls they can help me keep her safe but at no point ever have I left any of them outside unattended. I've rang Ofsted, my co-ordinator and Early Years and they have all said I've done nothing wrong. The Mm does have issues about protecting her kids as she 'lost' her child when she was 3 years old and had to call the police to find her and she has other issues within her family. I'm so upset that she's made this false allegation about me.

Playmate
19-10-2009, 08:43 PM
Just wanted to send you a big hug, this must be horrible. I think you have done the right thing by ringing ofsted yourself. Hope all goes ok
:group hug:

Twinkles
19-10-2009, 08:47 PM
This must be a horrible feeling but you have Ofsted on your side and that's a big worry off your mind.
I would not agree to looking after them again either.

Stanfield
19-10-2009, 08:47 PM
I am sorry to hear this.:(
If it was me in your position I would terminate the contract, if there is no sense of trust in the parent - minder relationship, then there is no relationship and I would have a hard time looking after their children if I did not feel trusted.

If you have done nothing wrong (which it sounds as though you have not) then you should not be made to feel this way, I would terminate it.

Feel better:group hug:

TheBTeam
19-10-2009, 08:48 PM
BIG HUGS! I don't think I would want to care for them any longer either.

Cazz
19-10-2009, 08:50 PM
Sorry to hear you're going through this. Big ((((hugs)))) to you.

sarah707
19-10-2009, 08:51 PM
Sorry to hear this has happened to you.

I suggest you terminate the contract as well. You cannot work without trust


Hope you are holding up ok x

Lou
19-10-2009, 08:53 PM
Let me get this straight.............

This woman is so concerned for her childs safety that she felt it nessesary to contact Ofsted etc and make a complaint.......BUT she still wants you to look after the children 1 day a week? Did i read that right? Sounds like she is completely contradicting herself!

I agree the trust has broken down and i would have to terminate the contract. No way could i still look after a child after the mum had complained about me!

Hope you are ok x

carlen222
19-10-2009, 09:13 PM
oh you poor soul, that is awfull!!!!! id terminate straight away!!!!! not worth putting yourself through that worry having to see the family each week!!!!! god knows what theyve got up their sleeve next!!!!! xx

Pipsqueak
19-10-2009, 09:20 PM
Let me get this straight.............

This woman is so concerned for her childs safety that she felt it nessesary to contact Ofsted etc and make a complaint.......BUT she still wants you to look after the children 1 day a week? Did i read that right? Sounds like she is completely contradicting herself!

I agree the trust has broken down and i would have to terminate the contract. No way could i still look after a child after the mum had complained about me!

Hope you are ok x

that was what I was thinking - my mouth hanging agape!!!:eek:

Before you terminate I would somehow try to get it in writing that she wants you to continue minding iyswim - so you have 'evidence' for Ofsted in case hey come a-knocking! not sure how you would get this - perhaps by asking her exactly what she wants - signed and dated.
after you have this letter in hand I would 'think' about the request and then say due to the situation you feel it no longer best to carry on citing an irrevocable breakdown in the partnership. are you 100% sure she has actually 'reported' you?

thats all with my sensible, professional head on - with my totally incredulous and peeved hat on I think I would be telling this woman where to shove it.:angry:

twinkle3005
19-10-2009, 09:38 PM
The Mum wanted me to have the children even after she said she wasn't happy but then when I said I'd have to think about it and would contact her later, she text me saying she didn't want me caring for the children and that she had another childminder so I've not had the chance to terminate the contract. I'm hoping Ofsted will come knocking on my door soon so I can tell them the truth.

The Juggler
19-10-2009, 09:39 PM
totally agree with everyone. poor you. sending hugs

charliegee
19-10-2009, 11:01 PM
ah you poor thing! what a nasty time for you, hope you are okay

sending lots of support to you !

x

wendywu
19-10-2009, 11:53 PM
Nasty woman. You dont need her in your life at all. I feel sorry for the new childminder.:panic:

Ofsted may not come out but write you a letter. Then you can put this all behind you.

twinkle3005
20-10-2009, 12:12 AM
I Can't sleep and probably won't be able to until Ofsted get in touch and I've told them my side. Why are some people so nasty and so willing to tell lies about others?

Monkey1
20-10-2009, 05:09 AM
In an ideal world hun everyone is nice to each other.........in reality some people just are not nice at all. I don't think you have anything to worry about, as i read it you said they had other issues with the family????? i would terminate too. sending hugs xxxx

angeldelight
20-10-2009, 05:32 AM
I Can't sleep and probably won't be able to until Ofsted get in touch and I've told them my side. Why are some people so nasty and so willing to tell lies about others?

Hope you managed to get some sleep in the end

Sending you hugs

Angel xxx

moogster1a
20-10-2009, 06:21 AM
\i hope you're charging her the notice period. horrible woman.

wellybelly
20-10-2009, 06:42 AM
that was what I was thinking - my mouth hanging agape!!!:eek:

Before you terminate I would somehow try to get it in writing that she wants you to continue minding iyswim - so you have 'evidence' for Ofsted in case hey come a-knocking! not sure how you would get this - perhaps by asking her exactly what she wants - signed and dated.
after you have this letter in hand I would 'think' about the request and then say due to the situation you feel it no longer best to carry on citing an irrevocable breakdown in the partnership. are you 100% sure she has actually 'reported' you?

thats all with my sensible, professional head on - with my totally incredulous and peeved hat on I think I would be telling this woman where to shove it.:angry:

Excellent advice!

Pudding Girl
20-10-2009, 06:46 AM
I Can't sleep and probably won't be able to until Ofsted get in touch and I've told them my side. Why are some people so nasty and so willing to tell lies about others?


Unfortunately there are some nasty pieces of work out there who don't give a stuff about the repurcussions of something like this.

Sincerely hope you get the chance to put your side across, does it work differently with Ofsted then that they don't necessarily come out for every complaint?

Sending you hugs x

miffy
20-10-2009, 06:48 AM
What an awful situation to find yourself in but at least Ofsted are aware and taking no action.

You are better off without this family - it beggars belief that mum could say she thought the children were not safe in your care but still wanted you to look after them!

Hope you're OK - you are far better off without this family!

Miffy xx

huggableshelly
20-10-2009, 06:55 AM
hiya
I'm hoping you are feeling better this morning, time to termiate the contracts like many others have said. dont leave yourself subjected to more slaps on the face, asking older children for help is GREAT its all part of caring for eachother so well done to you for involvong them all within your daily routine.
Time to release the places and fill up with more "trusting" parents.

DIPPY DOUGHNUT
20-10-2009, 06:56 AM
Let me get this straight.............

This woman is so concerned for her childs safety that she felt it nessesary to contact Ofsted etc and make a complaint.......BUT she still wants you to look after the children 1 day a week? Did i read that right? Sounds like she is completely contradicting herself!

I agree the trust has broken down and i would have to terminate the contract. No way could i still look after a child after the mum had complained about me!

Hope you are ok x

i totally agree with this.

Chatterbox Childcare
20-10-2009, 07:04 AM
I Can't sleep and probably won't be able to until Ofsted get in touch and I've told them my side. Why are some people so nasty and so willing to tell lies about others?

If Ofsted have not been in touch, how do you know that you have been reported? Usually they write to you but as it is a safeguarding issue I would have thought they would visit you.

candy cat
20-10-2009, 09:17 AM
I feel you should end contract.Why didn't the gran share her concerns with you first??? Like everyone else as said if she can't trust you then it isn't going to work is it...the job is hard enough as it is.You will be getting paranoid about everything to do with these children.
I remember 10 years ago when i worked as a nanny i had a really difficult child it got to the point where the parents were telling me that she was naughty with me because she knows i won't smack her.They told me i should smack her and i said NO WAY I WOULD NEVER EVER DO IT!! Anyway one day she told her mum i had hurt and scratched her arm. I was so upset and just walked out.It eventually turns out that she told someone at school she did it to get me into trouble.I was also a leader at an afterschool club at the time so i was worried as it could have cost me my career. I think parents need to treat us as professional people.

I hope you feel bettercx