View Full Version : What would you do?

09-09-2009, 06:18 PM
I currently have a before/after schooler whose contracted hours are 7.30am to school and school to 5.15pm. Mum decided that she would like me to give her tea as it then means that her LO doesn't have to wait until 6ish for her tea when she's too tired to eat it.

This isn't a problem as my own children like to eat about 4.30pm. I have my full timer who also goes home at 5.15pm, doesn't have tea but sits in high chair and has a banana whilst others eat and is quite happy.

Mum has been turning up between 4.30pm and 5.00pm depending upon what time she finishes work. This has not usually caused a problem because B finishes her tea and soon as she has done goes home. However on a Wed night I eat with the children as my parents are here and DH doesn't come home til late.

Tonight mum turned up at 4.35pm and said that she'd go and do a few jobs and then pop back at 5pm and pick up B when she'd finished her tea. Mum left and B got very upset and took a while to calm down and finsih her tea. When mum came back B didn't want to go home!!

I know that I need to say something to mum but not sure whether what to say. Do I..

a) ask her not to pick up B any earlier than 5pm to give her chance to have her tea and that if she finishes early to take the opportunity to go home and get a few jobs done before picking B up; or

b) say its not working out B having tea and then it doesn't matter if she does pick her up at 4.30pm?

Bearing in mind I have another before/after schooler starting a week tomorrow who will also be going home at 5.15pm and stopping for tea.

I really do not mind B stopping for tea but don't want her to feel rushed in eating her tea or getting upset because mum has called for her and she's not done. The other 4 nights its not really a probelm because I don't eat wioth the children. I really want to say something to mum but don't want to come across as dictating to her what she should do. B is contracted until 5.15pm anyway.

What would you all do?

09-09-2009, 06:24 PM
why dont you give mum the choice of doing either A or B
you could say that 'you are happy to give her tea but please dont turn up bfore 5pm because she wont have finished tea or if you prefer i can stop giving her tea incase you want to pick her up earlier and insted she can have a snack with the children.'

09-09-2009, 06:44 PM
I say to parents that our family tea time is between 445 and 515 and can they please respect that.

One never does but the rest are great about it! :D

09-09-2009, 06:50 PM
personally I would outline as you have done here and offer her the choice - I think what you have outlined is very reasonable. I'm sure she will see it that way as well