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View Full Version : I have lost my mojo!!



LeeAnn
18-08-2009, 12:26 PM
I need help! I think I am totally in survival mode at the moment. This will be 6 weeks since I started minding and it feels like it is getting worse instead of better. Now I can't even seem to keep the kids even a little entertained. I feel like crying at the mo to be honest.

Tomorrow the schools go back which will make things easier butmore hectic at the same time. I will have nursery runs to do but it should hopefully break up the day a bit and I will only have 1 mindee in the house in the mornings so hopefully this will help me be more organised and less overwhelmed :(

Wouls anyone like to share with me what a typical day looks like?

I know my days arent structured enough but because of the way my hours work I never really know what hours I will be working thw next day which makes planning difficult

My DD is struggling with one if the mindees in particular and is constantly moaning and crying about her being here. The poor wee mindee doesnt do anything wrong at all.

Pile on top of all this my growing bad feeling toward one of my parents who seems to be focussed on asking me for so many ridiculous favours/requests that she is now totally taking the ****. She seems to think I am her personalk assistant or something. The last straw was the way she came into my house today to drop off her DD, she was in such a foul moodm was horrible to her own DD, snapped at mine :angry: and left me with such a bad taste in my mouth, I want to cry and giveher notice :( :(

sorry I seem to be such a whine just now and just feel like I hve made the wrong decision but now I can't change it. I was so looking forward to starting minding I feel like I am failing :( :( I just tried to tell my DH this on the phone and he started saying that I can't change any of it and will just have to get on with it so I hung up on him and have taken the phone cable out of the wall and switched my phone to silent :blush:


My mum has taken my own 2 this afternnoon so poor mindees dont have to listen to DD bickering and whining. They are sat here next to me doing gluing and glittering. I just wanted to spill all of this before I burst into tears in front of them :blush:

Adiamond
18-08-2009, 12:37 PM
Aww bless you x x
I haven't really got any advice for you other than to say I am feeling a bit the same at the minute. I was really looking forward to doing this but at the minute I am finding it really difficult to get going:( I know that I am over tired and once I catch up on some sleep I will get motivated again, when that will be who knows????? I have this afternoon off but ds wants to go out when really I want to sleep I feel as though there isn't enough hours in the day to please everyone :panic: Hope you start feeling better soon
<<<<big hugs>>>>>>>> x x x

youarewhatyoueat
18-08-2009, 12:48 PM
Oh dear you are having a crap time at the mo, give yourself a chance its early days, focus on organising a routine that fits in with your own children and the mindees. I must admit I admire anyone who minds there own children and has mindees around the same age, I tried it with my youngest and ended up paying for him to go to playgroup as I couldn't concentrate on the mindees and felt I was constantly pushing my own son to one side. He loved playgroup and starts school in sept. I found a routine is the best, we go out every morning, home for lunch at 12 and quiet free play till sleep time. I only work 3 days a week now and try to do term time only.
It is early days at the moment, 6 weeks isn't long and when you get into the term and toddler groups and the children centres start up again I think you'll sort yourself out. I'm are always happy to listen, Caroline

mabel
18-08-2009, 01:06 PM
dont' worry school holidays can be really hard, especially have a range of ages, just enjoy various play, the toys, sand pit, water play, nature walk,
park visit, cooking, play-do, reading books and let them look at books independently, jigsaws

don't try to hard at planning just let the children create the play and see
what comes of it, usually ideas flow

mabel
18-08-2009, 01:08 PM
ps as for the parents, you need to develop a strong shoulder and just
sympathise her problems are NOT yours.

good luck

uf353432
18-08-2009, 02:06 PM
With regards to your parent - and you feeling delicate - you need to ask yourself was she bang out of order - or because there is a bit of resentment from your side and you are feeling a bit overwhelmed would it have normally washed over you? if she was bang out of order perhaps when she collects you could have a quiet word to advise that you work hard to make sure your daughter is not rude to people - so its not helpful if an adult is rude to her as it undermines what you are trying to acheive.

As hard as it is with regards to your daughter - you might have to ignore her behaviour - my 3 year old was particularly mean towards another little girl a year younger - she'd not been threatened by the boys or the younger children. I told her straight her behaviour was not acceptable, L was a guest in the house and if she couldn't be kind then she couldn't join in. Then everytime I had an oppotunity to praise her for playing nicely - I would until now they get on so lovely.

Plug the phone in, make peace with your husband. He is wrong YOU can change things - well you can change how you perceive things and change how you react to things, but you may not change it overnight.

Seriously you are 6 weeks into a whole new profession - hell being a parent is not easy and we want to help parent other peoples children as well. So days will be absolutely pants but we get such wonderful up sides, I watched my mindee take his first steps last week, smiles, laughs, hugs and kisses all so very worth every bit of pain we get.

Chin up - you are doing a fab job - you just need to convince yourself that you are :)

LeeAnn
19-08-2009, 11:58 AM
thankyou so muchfr your support. I was feeling like such a failure in all departments yesterday, bad childminder, bad mum :(

Feeling a bit brighter today, I had a good chat with DH last night and have come up with a plan of action. I have also bought a double buggy to make getting out and about easier, I know my DD could prob managemost of the walking we will be doing on school runs but I know this will work better to have her in a double as it technically doesnt belong to her. The other buggy I used occassionally is actually her special pink buggy so that caused some upset to her as well.

I think you are right about it being early days too, I was thinking after 6 weeks it we may be getting in a groove but I guess the 6 weeks being school hols has changed that a bit.

This morning been hectix already, DD and 1 mindee were at playgroup and the little mindee was with me but was sick so has had to go home.

DD now napping and mindee just finished lunch and having quiet book time. Hoping this afternoon will be without any drama .

Just wanted to update you a little , hopefully I will stay sane long enough to get over the rough ride
xx