advise needed please.

[sarahstanbridge]

hello all,

i look after a 3 year old girl who i am concerned about.

she was 3 in april and still regually has toilet accidents. she just doent seem to either want to use the potty or toilet and is quite happy to run around with wet pants on. mum was using pull ups but stopped that about 2 month ago when nursery and i said that we thought they might be confusing her but she is still no better. today she went through 4 clothes changes and she was only with for 6 hours.

she is a very hefty 3 year old (weighs nearly 4 stone) and i am wondering if the weight is contributing to her toilet problems or is she just being lazy or has she not quite got it yet? has anyone else had this problem? she is a lovely little girl but i am struggling to help her and her family on this issue.

also does anyone know what the average weight gain is for a child her age as she seems to be gaining 2lb every month? mum has just had to buy clothes to fit a 8-9 years for her.

any advise greatfully received.

[katickles]

Sarah - I have no idea but I am thinking that maybe something isn't quite right. Has mum taken her to the docs as I am thinking that she may have some sort of bladder problem or something.

TMI i know but is it any different wet or soiled??

I know that all children develop at their own pace & that this maybe perfectly normal.

I also agree that pull ups can be very confusing. The way i understand it is that if when potty/toiley training if the child hasn't "got it" within 2/3weeks then leave it for now & try later??

[sarahstanbridge]

Has mum taken her to the docs as I am thinking that she may have some sort of bladder problem or something.

TMI i know but is it any different wet or soiled??

I also agree that pull ups can be very confusing. The way i understand it is that if when potty/toiley training if the child hasn't "got it" within 2/3weeks then leave it for now & try later??

i dont think mum thinks there is aproblem. i thinks she she thinks any problem will just sort itself out
she quite happy to play with poo in her pant as well as wee.

some days she does it no problem. at one point she was clean dry here but not at nursery - now shes not clean here either

[uf353432]

My daughter is nearly 4 and up until I would say the past 3-4 mths she would still have the odd urine accidents (never poo) and after the age of 3 would have frequent multiple accidents in the day. There was no explanation for it other than she would be so engaged in play that she would forget, or was a bit lazy, or other 3 yr old reasons. So when I read this I am not entirely surprised - I think its perfectly normal for some children to become completely dry - the bladder does not actually mature until around 3 - 3 1/2 any way so children with wetting issues would not be considered a problem before the age of 4 ish perhaps even slightly older.

You could reward her with stickers for dry days, frequently ask her to use the toilet after meals and drinks and help her in that way its what we did for my daughter - and she seems to have finally cracked it, but still has the odd mishap even now at nearly 4.

If there are spells of dryness and then a sudden period of wet it might be worth mum checking with doc for any UTI in the child.

I personally don't think weight has much to do with it. Children will gain weight quickly for a period and then plateau for a bit.

[PRINCESSDAISYFLOWER]

i had some experience with this and a 4 yr old mindee
He was too involved in play and a bit to lazy to go and use the toilet, He was also too concerned that someone would take his seat, get his toy etc whilst he was in the loo.

The turning point was actually at nursery when he had pooed himself and another boy told him he stank!

Not nice i know but it did the trick. As she is only 3 i wouldnt be too concerned, the age of potty training seems to be getting later and later