Recording incidents

[childmind04]

I have a 4 yrld who i have had since she was 5 month old, lately she has began to hit me when she is told no :rolleyes:

Today she threw a full blown tantrum on the way home on a very crowded train because i asked her to stop grabbing the younger mindee in the pram, well did she go for it, kicked, slapped, poked my face, tried to head butt me, i have never felt so useless as in the end i had to physically restrain her by wrapping her arms around her :panic:

Now this is by no means the first time and i have informed mum at the end of the day but i no longer do daily diaries and today as i had to restrain her i done a ncma incident form, but i am thinking i should be making a more formal note of when she lashes out at me, she also does it with a mindee who also started the same week as her 4 years ago, she does not do it with anyone else but does do it to mum and gran, last week she really marked my stomach with a hefty punch :(

If i use ncma forms everytime it will cost a fortune but feel i should write it somewhere, dont really want it in her journey so anyone else used anything to record stuff like this???

I

[sunnysmile]

As it is an ongoing problem it may be wise to start a diary again of her behaviour and get mum to sign each time. I would also be thinking about terminating if she is trying to physically harm other children in your care.

[Pipsqueak]

It might be worth sitting down and having a think about what is triggering these outbursts. Tired, hungry, certain times of day, only when she is told no... what about some obs? Perhaps you and mum could put your heads together to see if there are any common denominators - from there you could both put a plan of action into the scheme of things of how you are both going to be consistent with this.

I agree about starting the daily diaries again. Lots of praise/reward for wanted behaviours, she is old enough to be talked to about types of behaviour/hurting others etc.

Are there any other factors that you have concerns about - could mum go to see the HV just for development reasurrance?

You cannot have her physically hurting you or others in your care - that is unnacceptable.

[childmind04]

Tiredness is a huge factor but this will not change as she has an older sibling who dances so she is out until 9.30 4 times a week :mad:

Done the plan about how we will tackle things but i have the feeling mum does not follow through her end :rolleyes:

Think i will try the daily diaries although i am not holding out much hope if they go home as i lost about 4 when she was younger :eek:

[Pipsqueak]

out to 9.30pm 4 nights a week:eek: :eek: poor little mite - no wonder she is getting upset

I think that you need to explain to mum that unless the situation improves over a course of time (set a time limit) then you will have to reconsider the contract and I would point out clause 25 NMA contact

[Helen79]

I would keep a diary instead of filling out an incident form every time. I wouldn't send the dairy home though, just ask mum to read & sign it when she collects & keep it at your house.
I wouldn't let the mindee know that you are doing this though as it might not discourage the bad behaviour if she's getting attention from it.

I would fill out an incident form if she really hurts another mindee though.

She must be so tired, is it possible for her to have a have a nap at yours in the morning or after lunch?

[childmind04]

She must be so tired, is it possible for her to have a have a nap at yours in the morning or after lunch?

I wish, the very odd time she might but its not often, plus she starts fulltime school in Sept :rolleyes:

Will do the diary, i will speak to mum tomorrow and explain what and why i am doing it, not sure anything will really change but i suppose it will show mum that i have tried ;)

[The Juggler]

I kept a behaviour log to see if I could identify triggers and timings during day when incidents occurred.

Definiately keep incident forms for each time. I know it's a lot of work but worthwhile if you need to justify to mum later why you are giving notice (if that's what you decide). Also getting her to sign them will keep her aware of what her lo is doing to you.

Have they taken her to the HV. I would definiately be suggesting this.

LOL let us know how you get on please. I have been in this situation and someone else on forum just has too. PM me if you want to.