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View Full Version : do you fit in your childminding playgroup?



mozarella
07-07-2009, 06:25 PM
I dont think I really fit in, the other CM seen so different to me and older too with not much in comon and they have there really close group and really hard to fit in as a newbie

Do you think it wll pass?

Moz

Mollymop
07-07-2009, 06:27 PM
Yes I do think it will pass. DOn't give up, it will be ok.

I am close to a few childminders in my area, so that helps, but I know the feeling of not fitting in, especially if you are a newer childminder and the others have been doing it for years.

georgie456
07-07-2009, 06:33 PM
It does get easier. I remember when I started going to mine, I literally had to force myself every week because I felt so out of the loop and they all knew each other so well.
3 and a half years on, I can honestly say I count them all as good friends and couldn't do the job without them. Stick with it hun x

Fairydust
07-07-2009, 06:58 PM
I have to agree. I have been childminding for 9 years and it took me 2 years to pluck up the courage to go along and when I did nobody spoke to me! I was upset and never went back for a year. I then forced myself to speak to one of the newer childminders in the area and we joined the group together(much easier!) and I can honestly say I dont know how I coped before joining the group & now I am one of the "older" childminders who always makes sure that there is a friendly face for any newbies!! Keep going & it will get easier I promise.

her8y
07-07-2009, 07:15 PM
I am lucky enough to have several childminding groups near to me. I felt like you do when I firt started but stuck with it and now I have so many childminding friends. I did try a couple of groups until I found the right one for me.

katickles
07-07-2009, 07:43 PM
I love mine, but it was hard at first as like you they are all older & more experienced than me as I hadn't been minding long at all when i first started going.

I was a very brave girl & kept on going & now its the best group we attend weekly.

I have also made some really really good friends through it :D

Keep going!!!

fionamal
07-07-2009, 07:56 PM
It took me a while but stuck at it and now cant wait to go, we are all really good friends now and visit each others houses on a rota basis for coffee and chat.

Stick with it as it does get easier

nannymcflea
07-07-2009, 08:09 PM
I think it's sad that you feel you are not fitting in. In our group everyone talks to everyone and although we have known each other for a while, some only from courses, no-one is left out.Childminding can be a lonely occupation and having a group to go to where you feel you can talk freely is to me important. I can't offer any advice except I hope you find a cm buddy there soon.

Jules27
07-07-2009, 08:17 PM
I've been very lucky I was very much accepted when I first started going at pre reg stage with my own son. I very soon became one of the 'core' members who is there pretty much everyweek!!! Our group is a small one so those of us who go very regulary are close but do welcome newcomers!!:D

youarewhatyoueat
07-07-2009, 08:56 PM
I dont think I really fit in, the other CM seen so different to me and older too with not much in comon and they have there really close group and really hard to fit in as a newbie

Do you think it wll pass?

Moz

what makes them seem different? how do you know you've got nothing in common with them. You may have to approach them, give them another go, perhaps you could take a friend with you, you could always say they were interested in being a cm. I have been on my own minding for 2 years now and its not much fun always going on outings on my own. My nearest drop in is 25 miles away and starts at 9.30am so not worth going after the school run. Shame youre not closer to me!

miffy
07-07-2009, 09:04 PM
Hope you give it another go :)

Miffy xx

ORKSIE
07-07-2009, 09:09 PM
I hope you find a CM buddy. In my area we have a strong CM community, but I have been around for a long time, So dont give up and get in there.

mozarella
08-07-2009, 09:56 AM
what makes them seem different? how do you know you've got nothing in common with them. You may have to approach them, give them another go, perhaps you could take a friend with you, you could always say they were interested in being a cm. I have been on my own minding for 2 years now and its not much fun always going on outings on my own. My nearest drop in is 25 miles away and starts at 9.30am so not worth going after the school run. Shame youre not closer to me!

Thanks, well when i come in, they say hello but then chat about their own things, friends, etc and well i cant get involved or they talk about other cm stuff but they dont look at me or address me, I tried to "butt in" but it doesnt seem to work either.

I wont give up, but just was hoping it would be a bit more welcoming

Spangles
08-07-2009, 10:31 AM
It's like when you start going to a new toddler group. First few times you go it can be really hard.

I would just concentrate on the children and try and chat when you can. It will only take contact with one friendly person and you will feel much better and soon become one of the group.

Definitely stick with it if you can, it would make such a positive difference to your working life once you've broken into the group.

Do they take turns planning an activity or something? If they do, maybe you could ask if you could arrange the next one and that way you will be involved or maybe bake some buns or something with your mindees to take in for snack time?

Good luck, I'm sure it will be fine.

xx

wendywu
08-07-2009, 10:34 AM
Come to surrey we are all really lovely here and always hold out the hand of friendship. And it often has a cup of coffee in it :laughing: