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View Full Version : how do you deal with a 30month old lying



newandlearning
15-06-2009, 08:46 PM
hi ya.. I was just wondering if children at this age really lie.. for instance, when
they chuck food on the floor and say 'I dunno how it got there.. not me' or 'why did you just throw that apple away?' 'that wasn't me'.. when you've seen them do it.. etc etc.. is this lying? other child is crying and the 30 month old says 'I didn't hit him' when the older child says 'he did!'..

anyway.. I just don't know how to deal with this.. should I be talking about lying? mum doesn't want me calling these types of events or anyothers as lying.. but then I really don't know how to deal with it..

if you can help that would be lovely.. thanks a lot.xx

sweets
15-06-2009, 08:51 PM
Hi not sure that you could really call it lying at that age, i would probably say 'thats not very nice to say it wasn't you when i know that it was' and maybe not make a big fuss about it and let it go.:)

sarah707
15-06-2009, 09:06 PM
It's very common attention seeking behaviour in children that age.

It's best ignored where possible, just make it clear that you don't get attention from it and move swiftly on.

You might need to keep a really close eye on the child for a while until he's through this phase though as they can do some silly things.

Good luck! :D

newandlearning
15-06-2009, 09:43 PM
hi.. well it could well be attention seeking.. hmm.. hadn't thought of that..
xxx I think its really easy to forget a child age when they are very articulate
and sound switched on.. sometimes I have to keep reminding myself that
he's only 2 and a half..xx thanks a lot.

singlewiththree
16-06-2009, 06:16 AM
My two and a half year old does it too, she is the youngest of 3. I take it as she has just realised that she will get in trouble and she is learning right from wrong. I treat it as lying as she does know that she should tell the truth and I talk to them all about the importance of telling the truth, read Peter and the Wolf and such stories and hope the message gets across. I don't think with my DD its attention seeking as she gets most of the attention anyway as she is very clingy.

haribo
16-06-2009, 06:58 AM
i havent had this yet with my two los who are 2 and nearly 2 . but the nearly 2 is really crafty ( for want of a better word) i see her dominating the other one -she will push her to get a reaction or take things off her - when i come into view or she realises im watching she hurriedly puts her arm round her and says " aahh be nice " :laughing:

Spangles
16-06-2009, 07:03 AM
Could you carefully word things so that the child has no chance to lie?

If the child does lie could you jokingly answer by saying something lighthearted about them winding you up or joking? If they are doing it for attention at least they will get positive and happy attention and may learn not to do it, it will take the tension out of the situation as well.

As the child gets older, if they still do this, you could face it then by reading books on lying, etc.

Lady Haha
16-06-2009, 09:22 AM
Could you carefully word things so that the child has no chance to lie?

If the child does lie could you jokingly answer by saying something lighthearted about them winding you up or joking? If they are doing it for attention at least they will get positive and happy attention and may learn not to do it, it will take the tension out of the situation as well.

As the child gets older, if they still do this, you could face it then by reading books on lying, etc.


hehe! I still 'word' things so they can't lie! Instead of saying 'Did you do drop that on the floor' or 'Did you hit so and so?' I always say ' Why did you drop that on the floor?' and 'Why did you hit so and so?" even if I didn't see! Works every time! When you give them the chance to make an excuse for their behaviour, the truth comes out!

Helen79
16-06-2009, 10:16 AM
hehe! I still 'word' things so they can't lie! Instead of saying 'Did you do drop that on the floor' or 'Did you hit so and so?' I always say ' Why did you drop that on the floor?' and 'Why did you hit so and so?" even if I didn't see!

I try to do the same but dd will always still try to lie, even when I clearly saw her hitting ds she'll still claim he bumped his head on the floor even when I ask 'why did you hit ds?'

She forgets that our flat is very small & I can hear her every move where ever I am in the house even if I can't see her :laughing:

I wouldn't make a big deal out of it at that age but let them know that you do know the truth & still ask them to apologise & that they won't get away with the unwanted behaviour that they're lying about.