View Full Version : BE AWARE...this is going to be a long one...

15-02-2008, 05:02 PM
thank you in advance for reading this.I am a bit lost ...

I have been looking after a LO for 6 weeks now, J is 2 1/2.he is Polish (both his parents are polish). I am a little concerned about his development...He comes to me for 4 full days/week and has always gone to nursery/childminder's.

He only ever plays with cars/trains, doesn't want anyone anyone near him, pushes everyone away as soon as they come closer to play with him and his speech is nearly non-existent. It did cross my mind that he may be slightly autistic or that he may have a language disorder or something?
He doesn't really say much, he can't even say please or thank you properly and he sometimes doesnt recognise his name.
My dd, who is 16mnths old and is also billingual, understands more than him!
I know boys can be a bit slower than girls but I do think this is different.

We have been doing colours, and I tried to teach him 'red'...we looked for red cars, played with red playdough, did a red ferrari collage etc...but the only word he would say was 'car'.

I am trying to be patient but I feel he needs more one on one attention, that I can't really give him as I have 2 more one year olds.

I haven't approached the parents, I feel I need to do more written obs and take it from there.
I am in the process of doing a visual timetable , which I hope may help.

He has been pushing and hitting my dd...which may be a part of frustration that he can't communicate and his age of course.

What I need to know is:
Do you think he may be behind?
What would you do re his development ?
Would you approach his parents?

Any advice greatly appreciated!
Thank you again for reading this...hope it makes sense!

Jana x

15-02-2008, 05:09 PM
Sorry - not really sure I can give any advice, but didn't want to read & ignore.

I think all the obs you're doing sound great, and at least you have something to show the parents if/when you decide to speak to them.

Presumably he starts school this Sept if he's 4, so sounds like he should know a bit more.

Does he go to a nursery/playgroup? Perhaps you could speak to them to see if they have noticed the same, & see if they have mentioned it to the parents.

Hope someone comes along with some more solid advice for you.

Kelly x

15-02-2008, 05:10 PM
Sorry - just re-read it & he's only 2 1/2. Saw the 4 days a week thing, that's where I was getting 4 from... Der!

Kelly x

15-02-2008, 05:17 PM
Do you have a copy of eyfs Jana? I would have a look at the learning and devleopment grids for around his age and see where he is on them...

Do this using observations... NOT by testing him... just watch how he plays and see if he meets the stages.

Do you have info about autism? You can get advice from here -


And I would ring a health visitor in confidence and take advice from them on where to go next with the aggression...

Are the parents easy to talk to? Does he speak English at home with them? How is their English? It might just be that he cannot communicate... or he is developmentally delayed...

Just read this back and there are lots of ifs and questions, sorry... I think this is going to be a long haul for you! :D

15-02-2008, 05:21 PM
Some great advice already given....also occured to me...does he hear ok?
Signing & flashcards may help alieviate some of the frustration...whether something more complex or not!

15-02-2008, 05:24 PM
Thanks Sarah, will have a look at the grids, didn't think of that...duh!

They speak in polish at home but he comes out with english words mostly.

Did a course on autism and aspergers...they usually get diagnosed after the age of 3. But it affects more than 1 child in 300...mostly boys...So, yes, it does make me think he may be.

Thanks again.

15-02-2008, 05:26 PM
[QUOTE=tasha;55167]Some great advice already given....also occured to me...does he hear ok?

Oh...I didn't think of that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Clever you Tasha...
will have to ask, thanks


15-02-2008, 05:51 PM
How about doing some flashcards with the polish/english translation, he can teach you polish!!! This should go some way to help any communication frusttations.

Perhaps you can ask mum/dad to help you make up flashcards, asking your local council/social services/surestart programmes if there is anyone in the polish community you can contact for help/advice/translation etc.



15-02-2008, 11:14 PM
Have a word with your development officer, they might be able to help with the language barrier and maybe able to help with development problems too.

15-02-2008, 11:17 PM
great advice given, cant really add to that, sorry!

16-02-2008, 08:21 AM
Just catching up with this Jana

You've already had great advice but I didn't want to read and run

Good luck

Miffy xx

16-02-2008, 09:35 AM