my daughter playing up

[Joannechildmind]

My 7 yr dd plays up nearly everytime J (3.5) mum arrives to collect him, my dd and J act like brothers and sisters (i have had J since he was 6 months old)
If am getting so fed up of them arguing, my dd will shout at him and wind him up (which he has also now learnt, from her id imagine) when i confront her she says she is 'helping' me. My DD gets so frustrated with him.
She is/ has had a troubled few months with one thing or another (school mainly) and we have recently 2 months ago changed her school to the local one, which she really likes.
I asked her last week is she was happy having the children here and she said yes i love having them here.
Im not sure what to do, any advice??

[angeldelight]

I think a lot of us would have been in the same situation that you are going through

What are they like during the day together do they play well? Is it just at collection time that your daughter is like this ?

There may be no other reason for it but she knows she is getting attention from it and knows its getting you mad

Is collection time quick or is parent at the door for ages ?

Maybe distract your daughter - give her 10 min of your time once the little one has gone home - maybe she could set out the toys / books that she wants to play with whilst you are at the door?

If that fails then I would have words with your daughter in front of the parent - maybe you usually wait untill the parent has gone before you say anything to her and your daughter knows this so pushes you more each time?

Sorry it is difficult to know what to advise with out knowing the full details sounds like she has had a lot of changes lately though so she might just be pushing you for a reaction

Hope you work it out though

Angel xx

[michellethegooner]

good advice from angel, not sure I can add anymore, but didnt want to read & run.

Hope things improve xx

[louloudi]

Sounds like some great advice above.

I can relate slightly as my 10yr DS starts winding up 5yr mindee from 3.30 at the start of my working week. I put it down to a territory thing that they are all capable of. When speaking to other childminders near me will all talk about how our children can be bossy, defensive and act up when we have other children to watch.

I tend to have a good talk with DS and explain the reason why this behaviour is not wanted, I also use a reward chart with him so he can work towards earning games etc.. so after several warnings a sticker come off as he knows fine well what he's doing!!

let us know how you get on