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vix84
23-04-2009, 08:59 AM
Hi time for a moan:panic:

I have changed my contract with my 14mth old to a temp. for 5 weeks and then if he doesnt settle the contract will end.:(

He still cries when dad drops off but settles after 10mins which is fine - but he will then randomly start again, if I so much as move he will start so every time I pop to the kitchen or we go in the garden he will cry. He has been with us for about 10 weeks, 2 afternoons a week. He also doesnt like to be cuddled, will rather sit on his cushions.

I have my 10mth old son too, and from June my full-time 11 month old. I told dad about the contract etc. and he was fine and understands, I am worried about settling in the 11 month old if child a is still unsettled.
He also cried the whole time at soft play so we left early, but the previous time he was fine. It means we are staying in and my child is being left out a bit as I am so pre-occupied trying to distract child A. It also cant be nice for my son to keep seeing A upset. I also want to enjoy my afternoons.

Luckily the dad is out of work at the moment and job hunting, hopefully he will get a job and we can try 3 full days a week which may help.

If not I am going to have to end the contract if he doesnt settle but I have the others to think of:(

devoncm
23-04-2009, 09:14 AM
I hope he settles for you.

You have to do what is right for you and your family, im sure the parents will understand that.

Louise_Oaktree
23-04-2009, 09:22 AM
2 afternoons is probably simply not enough. I see it all the time at Pre-school where children go for 1 or 2 mornings and are often collected early because they are upset (they have a 10 minute crying policy). Once their nursery grant kicks in after they turn 3 they change to 5 mornings and they are fine.

I had a problem with an 18 month old during a long settling in period, her Mum was due to start a short course at college and she came every week for an afternoon to help settle her in but she only started to settle once she actually started properly and she was attending 2 full days.

10 weeks is a long time though, OFSTED would probably question you if you continued much longer anyway, this happened to a CM friend, there was a huge dispute over money because when the CM have notice the parent took the child out and refused to pay, OFSTED said in future she should have ended it after a few weeks. Try not to blame yourself, I am sure we have all had unsettled children, sometimes it's just not right for them.

vix84
23-04-2009, 07:04 PM
2 afternoons is probably simply not enough. I see it all the time at Pre-school where children go for 1 or 2 mornings and are often collected early because they are upset (they have a 10 minute crying policy). Once their nursery grant kicks in after they turn 3 they change to 5 mornings and they are fine.

I had a problem with an 18 month old during a long settling in period, her Mum was due to start a short course at college and she came every week for an afternoon to help settle her in but she only started to settle once she actually started properly and she was attending 2 full days.

10 weeks is a long time though, OFSTED would probably question you if you continued much longer anyway, this happened to a CM friend, there was a huge dispute over money because when the CM have notice the parent took the child out and refused to pay, OFSTED said in future she should have ended it after a few weeks. Try not to blame yourself, I am sure we have all had unsettled children, sometimes it's just not right for them.


Thats interesting, I didnt think about Ofsted etc.
Actually, its been about 6 weeks now, but by the end of the temp. contract it would have been 11 weeks.
Thinking about it now, Im sure he was coming down with the bug thats been going around, and previous to that he has had a sickness bug too.
I also think 2 afernoons isnt enough - I did say to the dad that it doesnt help that he is part-time and has also had 2 days off in his 6 weeks here.

Im relieved to have addressed the issue, and I now know that instead of panicing about having an upset mindee and settling a new one in, that I have the option to opt out, so to speak.

Luckily my other mindee who is only here 5 hours a week, 12mths, came in and has been really happy, even without a usual sleep. So I had a good afternoon.
They have all been teething at the same time - and Im still being woken about 4 times in the night by my own son with his teething:rolleyes:


Anyway, moan over - off to read all the other posts to catch up:)