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Pudding Girl
24-03-2009, 06:49 PM
following on from this request:

http://www.netmums.com/coffeehouse/lifestyle-511/lifestyle-8/work-study-childcare-44/269924-grandparents-childcare-would-you-pay-them.html

What do you think? Should it happen?

Personally I think that would be the death knell for people like us! I think if they want paying then the same rules should apply to anyone else being paid, to be fully Registered.

Pipsqueak
24-03-2009, 06:55 PM
following on from this request:

http://www.netmums.com/coffeehouse/lifestyle-511/lifestyle-8/work-study-childcare-44/269924-grandparents-childcare-would-you-pay-them.html

What do you think? Should it happen?

Personally I think that would be the death knell for people like us! I think if they want paying then the same rules should apply to anyone else being paid, to be fully Registered.

AGree with you George. There is a way round it though - the gp's look after the child in the childs home -then in effect its nannying isn't it

Princess Sara
24-03-2009, 06:58 PM
I'm not too sure. My mum registered as a childminder so she could get paid to look after ds1 back when all you really needed was a first aid certificate. Back then I didn't think too much about it. But now I'm registering as a childminder, properly, paperwork and all, I think everyone getting paid to look after children should have the same standards.

There's a big difference to nanny looking after her grandson, taking him to the park and spoiling him all day, and a proffessional teaching and assessing a child through planned activives and free play.

I understand that alot of grandparents are putting themself out to look after their childrens children because it's easier/cheaper/keeping it in the family. Some people think it's better for the child to be around family in those early years, but surely this has been happening for centuries, back in the day when grandparents still lived with their children, families looked after each other and nurseries were for those with lots of money. It was expected back then, why change things now?

I would be happy to pay my mum again to look after my boys, but not in the same context as I would pay a childminder or nursery. They do different things and serve different purposes.

Schnakes
24-03-2009, 06:59 PM
I absolutely agree with you George.

Im really annoyed with this news story. (Been following it for a couple of days now). I dont think grandparents should be used as a childcare service anyway - let the poor buggers have their retirememnt/lives in peace. They've already raised you - why should they have to raise your kids as well?

Alright, maybe a day a week would be pleasant enough, but to look after a baby/energetic toddler full time etc???

Sx

rickysmiths
24-03-2009, 07:25 PM
Hey! Careful what you say! I work 55hrs a week looking after a least three under threes a day a four 2 days a week.

I am olader then Jades mum, but I'm glad i'm not a granny yet my dd is only 16.

I could be a grandparent, I'm working full time in childcare!!!!!!

I actually agree, I would never have asked my parents or my inlaws to look after my children on a regular day to day basis. They did help out on occassion.
If anyone is paid to look after children on a regular basis they should register like us. But the could just claim they are a nanny lol:laughing: :laughing: :laughing: as long as they pay their tax who are we to say anything?

donnadoo2004200
24-03-2009, 08:41 PM
I absolutely agree with you George.

Im really annoyed with this news story. (Been following it for a couple of days now). I dont think grandparents should be used as a childcare service anyway - let the poor buggers have their retirememnt/lives in peace. They've already raised you - why should they have to raise your kids as well?

Alright, maybe a day a week would be pleasant enough, but to look after a baby/energetic toddler full time etc???

Sx

Be very careful what you say. I am a grandparent to a toddler of 2yrs old. I am a registered childminder and I did it because I love children and wanted to look after my grandchildren and other peoples children. I am by no means near retirement age or am I a poor ****** as you put it and I really dont want to live in piece quite yet. Yes I do look after this this and 2 more besides energetic toddlers fulltime 52 hrs a week and looking at some toddler groups at other much younger childminders I could run rings around them. My granddaughter is not spoilt by me she is treated the same as the other mindees and I also follow the EYFS for all under 5,s.
PLEASE DONT TAR ALL GRANDPARENTS WITH THE SAME BRUSH.
I FEEL I AM PRIVELIGED TO BE ABLE TO HELP RAISE MY GRANDDAUGHTER AND NO WAY IS SHE A BURDEN ON ME OR MY HUSBAND AND IN NO WAY WHAT SO EVER FEEL USED.

Blackhorse
24-03-2009, 08:54 PM
I think if my mum wanted to look after my dd (she is not retired yet and in another country, but if she could she would) then that would be ok with me.
I would want my dd to be arond other children though, so wouldn't want her to be ''only with gran'' all week, but maybe half days here and there iyswim
I probably woulnd't pay her as such, but maybe give her money towards food, nappies etc - that's if she would take it.
I don't think that there is anything wrong with that. as previously said, it has happened for centuries

I think there is a difference between caring for other people's children for money (and the registration process that goes along with it) and being a granparent that is able and willing to look after their grandchildren.

Schnakes
24-03-2009, 09:02 PM
No offense intended guys - I was thinking of my grandparents - 76 and 74 years old. :o I was also thinking of my own mother who would recoil in horror at the thought of looking after her own children - let alone someone elses!! :rolleyes:

I see a lot of grandparents, particularly from some a certain cultural group, who have no idea how to deal with young children, no idea how to play or what/who children should be playing with. You are all registered childminders - the assumption is that you do know these things.

Reading Borough Council have recently done a massive, very expensive, program to offer support to these particular groups as it was causing such a worry. I have to say - I was also thinking of these groups when I made my comments.

Sx

claireLouise
24-03-2009, 09:50 PM
In Scotland registeration is required based on the number of hours you care for a child each week, hence grandparents, aunies who regularly care need to regisiter even if not paid!:(

Claire

buildingblocks
24-03-2009, 10:40 PM
Interesting thread this.

I may be wrong in this but if you are a childminder who is registered and care for your grandchildren you can claim tax credits but if you are only caring for your grandchild and no others than you can't claim (as I say not sure if this correct or not).

I feel that if you are registered whether you only care for your grandchildren or not (whether through choice or circumstances) then you should be able to claim the tax credit bit after all they are registered just like I am and have gone through the process.

hope that makes sense (could only see the original post and no replies so not sure what the nertmums thread was about as such)

Chatterbox Childcare
24-03-2009, 10:42 PM
I think that if grandparents can go through the same Ofsted checks and regulations that we do then why not. However I don't agree with it if they cannot.

angeldelight
24-03-2009, 10:42 PM
I absolutely agree with you George.

Im really annoyed with this news story. (Been following it for a couple of days now). I dont think grandparents should be used as a childcare service anyway - let the poor buggers have their retirememnt/lives in peace. They've already raised you - why should they have to raise your kids as well?

Alright, maybe a day a week would be pleasant enough, but to look after a baby/energetic toddler full time etc???

Sx

Hey I am a grandparent and not anywhere near to retirment age and peace just yet thankyou very much

:laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

Angel xx

huggableshelly
25-03-2009, 07:23 AM
I'm too young to comment on this as might offend the wrinklies in the forum LMAO

I think grandparents should be reinboursed for expences with a small wage towards heating and water bills too but not paid as childminders/nannies unless they become registered and fit into regulations.

After all what would be in place to ensure the wrinklies dont take on more children and claim them as grandchildren too in order to line their pockets.

some Grannies are taken gor granted ... my Mum looked after my cousins on a daily basis, it started off as once a wk babysitting to all day every day whilst trying to care for her own children too (that includes me) she didnt work and had no income yet didnt get any money from my autn either, she provided all food and clothing too.

I love my Mum to bits but could never use her that way ( aparat from the fact that she lives 2 hours away lol)

in my opinion Grandparents have done their job with raising children and should beable to enjoy occasional babysiting not full blown daily childcare.

(yes I know there are alot of young grannies out there lol so I' stopping this post right now before I upset anymore)

Schnakes
25-03-2009, 08:42 AM
Im not saying that people over the age of 30 cant possibly look after children, okay - chill people!

angeldelight
25-03-2009, 08:58 AM
Im not saying that people over the age of 30 cant possibly look after children, okay - chill people!

We were kidding !!!!!

xxx

mandy moo
25-03-2009, 09:07 AM
Justhad to add my 2 ****** worth:laughing:
My MIL (she a very young 72) will babysit my 2 over nite at her house If hubbie and I are going to arrive home after 12pm, as I dont agree with her driving the 6 or so miles to her house at that time of night (same with my parents) I always buy her something to say thankyou mainly flowers, a small bottle of bailey as thats her favorite tipple, and a box of chocholates.
this happens probabley once every 3 or 4 months.
My brother in law and his wife however take the P**s, he has his own haulage type firm with well over a dozen lorries, wife works for him, so moneys not tight, even in todays current climate theyre doing ok.
The children are privatley educated, and they have a detached house swimming pool and a few acres of land.
SHe looks after their to girls very nearly every other weekend or so. and at least 3 days a week during the school holidays. she provides all their meals also while they are there.
They dont give her a thing! oh they did give her £200 pounds to go towards her holiday last year!
So I have mixed feelings about this, yes I do think they should pay her and not just expect it, simply because shes their grandmother..

Ok rant over

Helen79
25-03-2009, 11:57 AM
I think it's a good idea in principle as long as they're following regulations & become registered.
I also think it's so open to abuse. People would be claiming the child care element of tax credits for baby sitting for nights out & I think a lot of people would really take advantage of it.
I know my mum & mil would love to give up work to look after my kids if they were going to get paid for it.

In my area a lot of grandparents look after their grandchildren whilst looking after their own children after school. They'd be being paid to do what they're already doing which is what families are for & you can't always guarantee the level of care they'd be getting.

yummymummy
25-03-2009, 12:09 PM
I have mixed feelings about this as a few of the ladies I sit with at toddlers are grandmas who are very put upon. They grumble to us but if they dare say anything to their daughters/daughter in laws they go into such a strop that it causes a family rift. One doesn't get paid the other charges £2 an hour for two children, this barely covers the breakfast, lunch and tea she provides everyday and also as she is grandma sweets etc are expected to be bought from the shop on the way home. This lady is exhausted and says she would love to "enjoy" her grandchildren by just providing babysitting in the evening and at weekends (she is actually also expected to do this on top of the weekly childcare)
It is difficult because they both say if we had wanted another young family we would have had one, we just wanted to relax and enjoy our retirements. Their children made them feel so guilty that they agreed to providing the childcare.
A ex-mindees mum of a childminder friend got her mum to register as a childminder also and claims the Tax credits to pay her but keeps them!!!
This is hearsay of course so I do not know if this can be done and is true. So the whole subject may not be as straightforward as we first thought. Of course there are grandparents who do provide childcare that may not be for as long as the ladies I know so may be very happy to do so.

Schnakes
25-03-2009, 12:45 PM
you can't always guarantee the level of care they'd be getting.
Reply With Quote

Exactly. I: know three ladies who gave up "work" to register as childminders to look after their childrens kids, one of whom is my aunty. She feels very put upon and taken advantage of at times. The other two, who I have observed at toddler groups etc, do not interact with the other children very well, and I wonder why they bother.

Thats not to say that ALL nans who register as childminders are going to be rubbish...I just think that childminders have to WANT to be childminders...not just cos it brings in a bit of extra money while they have their grandkids. (Or their own kids, for that matter.) (I'll just duck while you all throw rocks at me now! :p )

Sx

brightstar
25-03-2009, 12:53 PM
If this happens there will be a lot of unsuitable people looking after children because then they won't be forced to go out to work to get off benefits and the standard of care for the children will be diabolical. There are plenty of people out there who aren't too fussy about who cares for their kids and the standard of care.
It will put childminders in a bad light, people already moan about our charges, what hope will we have of making a decent living?

Chatterbox Childcare
25-03-2009, 01:01 PM
Okay everyone - stand back and look at what the grandparents can offer. It is the best for the child? Will they deliver the outcomes as directed by law and inspected through Ofsted?

If a parent wants the best for their child then they will go with whomever, including grandparents.

My personal view is that they would need to be trained and the standards and requirements these days, as we all know, take a lot of doing and continuing training.

Grandparents can be childminders and vica versa but if they are paid, are they any different to unregistered minders? Now that is another can or worms!!

donnadoo2004200
25-03-2009, 01:02 PM
[QUOTE=Schnakes;373248] you can't always guarantee the level of care they'd be getting.
Reply With Quote

Exactly. I: know three ladies who gave up "work" to register as childminders to look after their childrens kids, one of whom is my aunty. She feels very put upon and taken advantage of at times. The other two, who I have observed at toddler groups etc, do not interact with the other children very well, and I wonder why they bother.

Thats not to say that ALL nans who register as childminders are going to be rubbish...I just think that childminders have to WANT to be childminders...not just cos it brings in a bit of extra money while they have their grandkids. (Or their own kids, for that matter.) (I'll just duck while you all throw rocks at me now! :p )

No I dont want to throw rocks just yet. But I want people to understand that me and presumebly many other grandparents WANT to look after their grandchildren, they are not a burden, they are not put upon us. I worked in a bank for 10yrs most boring job in the world. I gave it up because I love children not only my grandchildren but all children. I live to play. I have also noticed a lot of younger childminders only interested in their own child and not mindee at toddler groups and I even told one of them you havent spoken or looked at their minded child in 40 min (told to mind my own business).
I just want to say each to his own. If a grandparent thinks they are upto the job goodluck to them. My children inc mindees are my world I love them all.

donnadoo2004200
25-03-2009, 01:08 PM
If the grandparents think they are capable of which I am sure they are with registering and following EYFS then why shouldnt they. Surely you cant think people would choose a stranger (childminder) to family there is no comparison. :panic:

mandy moo
25-03-2009, 02:27 PM
[QUOTE=Schnakes;373248] you can't always guarantee the level of care they'd be getting.
Reply With Quote

Exactly. I: know three ladies who gave up "work" to register as childminders to look after their childrens kids, one of whom is my aunty. She feels very put upon and taken advantage of at times. The other two, who I have observed at toddler groups etc, do not interact with the other children very well, and I wonder why they bother.

Thats not to say that ALL nans who register as childminders are going to be rubbish...I just think that childminders have to WANT to be childminders...not just cos it brings in a bit of extra money while they have their grandkids. (Or their own kids, for that matter.) (I'll just duck while you all throw rocks at me now! :p )

No I dont want to throw rocks just yet. But I want people to understand that me and presumebly many other grandparents WANT to look after their grandchildren, they are not a burden, they are not put upon us. I worked in a bank for 10yrs most boring job in the world. I gave it up because I love children not only my grandchildren but all children. I live to play. I have also noticed a lot of younger childminders only interested in their own child and not mindee at toddler groups and I even told one of them you havent spoken or looked at their minded child in 40 min (told to mind my own business).
I just want to say each to his own. If a grandparent thinks they are upto the job goodluck to them. My children inc mindees are my world I love them all.

But how many grandparents feel like this I wonder, My MIL has told me herself that she finds it too much sometimes, but feels she cant turn round and say no, just in case ( & theyve had problems between themselves in the past, MIL and Daughter In Law that is, and DIL stopped her from seeing them fro a couple of years)their mum turns round and wont let them see their grandmother again.
But I do feel she ought to be recognised in someway especialy as they can afford it.

Schnakes
25-03-2009, 02:43 PM
I have also noticed a lot of younger childminders only interested in their own child and not mindee at toddler groups

Yes - which is why I mentioned about mums too. :)

If the grandparents think they are capable of which I am sure they are with registering and following EYFS then why shouldnt they.

But thats as a registered childminder though, not as a nan whos paid to look after her childrens children? There is a difference, and you know, thumbs up to grandparents who do register to look after their litle ones - at least they recognise what a huge responsibiity it is to look after somone elses child full time.

Surely you cant think people would choose a stranger (childminder) to family there is no comparison

Ha!! I think I could argue very well why that is not always the case. Just off the top of my head - how about babyP? Do you think he was better with a family member or a registered childminder? I know thats an extreme, but there are many many bad families out there. Just because you have given birth, doesnt automatically make you a good parent.

Also - are you trying to do yourself out of a job??? :jump for joy:

But I do feel she ought to be recognised in someway especialy as they can afford it.

Thats a matter for your family though...I think (from what Ive read in the news) they are saying that grandparents should get money from the government in the form of topped up tax credits, credits towards their pensions etc for looking after children. I personally think that there is plenty of highly trained, devoted childcare facilities out there. While that is the case, Im not sure that we should be encouraging families to get childcare on the cheap at all. Where does it end? The government could pay my sister to look after my kids. My best friend. My next door neigbour? No - this is how childcare was before it became regulated and it became regulated for a reason - to improve the outcomes for children. Why take steps back?

Lastly, I find this argument pretty laughable:
it has happened for centuries

So? So has slavery, prostitution, domestic abuse blahdy-blah. While Im not AT ALL comparing your mum looking after your child while you are at work with anything like that (although slavery....!!! :p ), I would like to point out that just because something has happened for a long time doesnt mean that its right. Things change...its called PROGRESS.

Sx

Tatia
25-03-2009, 06:10 PM
I'd kill to have my mother close enough to be paid to look after my DD. The whole reason I became a childminder in the first place and am having a hard time settling on wrap-around care for her now that I'm going back to work is because I don't want to have to choose between strangers (or even some minders I know:blush: ). I hate it. Do I think every grandmother or grandfather is suitable to care for children? No. But as a parent, if I choose to send my child to a grandparent instead of a registered minder, why shouldn't #1 I have that choice and #2 the grandparent be suitably reimbursed?

It's not the same as going with an unregistered childminder at all. It's family.

louloudi
25-03-2009, 06:22 PM
I absolutely agree with you George.

Im really annoyed with this news story. (Been following it for a couple of days now). I dont think grandparents should be used as a childcare service anyway - let the poor buggers have their retirememnt/lives in peace. They've already raised you - why should they have to raise your kids as well?

Alright, maybe a day a week would be pleasant enough, but to look after a baby/energetic toddler full time etc???

Sx

Totally agree with you here!!! I'm a single parent and don't expect my parents to have my son although they aren't old enough to retire my parents work full time as see them as having done their bit!!
I understand that it is hard to juggle everything but this kond of move would have a hugh impact on us!!!

Pudding Girl
25-03-2009, 06:27 PM
The Govt have said they have no intention of implementing any such payments for grandparents to look after their grandchildren - sense at last!

Just think of all the people ( incuding many of us!!) who would be put out of business.

It won't ever happen imo - too open to fraud and abuse.

Tatia
25-03-2009, 06:29 PM
But the point is, it's not for everyone. It's about allowing families the right to choose.

Tatia
25-03-2009, 06:30 PM
Sorry George, didn't see your last post.:) Ah well. I think it's sad but then, my mother lives 6,000 miles away so not likely to impact me either way.

Pudding Girl
25-03-2009, 06:31 PM
But the point is, it's not for everyone. It's about allowing families the right to choose.


They already have the right to choose. CM/Nursery/Grandparents/stay at home.

They can also choose to pay the grandparents themselves without the govt having to be involved.

Tatia
25-03-2009, 06:33 PM
Yes I know but that's what I think is unfair. Ah well, just my tuppence. At the very least, I think grandparents should be allowed to register JUST to care for grandchildren and not be forced to take on other mindees, as they are now. After all, we have the right to say who we will mind and how many so why shouldn't they?

Schnakes
25-03-2009, 08:58 PM
Tatia, why on earth do you think grandparents who are registered are FORCED to look after other children?

Sx

donnadoo2004200
25-03-2009, 10:38 PM
What I think Tatia is saying that if you are a registered grandparent for the childs parents to claim tax credit you must also have another mindee not a family member on your books also. I know this is a fact as I contacted tax credit when I was in the process of registering last year. Also Ofsted said they would not inspect me with just grandchildren present you need other mindees not family there also.:)

Tatia
25-03-2009, 10:50 PM
Yes Donna, that's what I was getting at. You explained it much more clearly than I did as I assumed everyone knew that. :) Schnakes, there'd be your answer then.

angeldelight
25-03-2009, 11:32 PM
Yes Donna, that's what I was getting at. You explained it much more clearly than I did as I assumed everyone knew that. :) Schnakes, there'd be your answer then.

:laughing: :laughing:

angeldelight
25-03-2009, 11:34 PM
If the grandparents think they are capable of which I am sure they are with registering and following EYFS then why shouldnt they. Surely you cant think people would choose a stranger (childminder) to family there is no comparison. :panic:

I agree

My daughter in law is thinking of going back to work and I would hope that they would come to me first to care for my grandson and not to a stranger and why on earth would they even want to think of doing that

Angel xx

huggableshelly
26-03-2009, 07:39 AM
I've been discussing this with my hubby this morning.

My mother in law claims carers allowance for her daughter who now has twins but more often than not she cant cope with them so MIL steps in daily to feed shop take them out and has them as overnight care. She is unpaid and has given up her social life to care for the twins aswell as her daughter.

I think maybe there would be a way for Grandparents to claim some form of carers allowance that will help to reinborse their heating and water bills and give them a little extra allowing them to provide the food without having to go without themselves.

I know in this case she gets c/a for her daughter and she is there daily anyway to assist her but used to go from 1pm till 5pm 5 days a wk and her SIL would do the evening and weekend care. Now she wakes at 5am gets there at 6am leaves when twins are sleeping by 9pm or takes them home with her for the night. she deserves to get something but her daughter cant afford to give anything at all.

I feel she is being taken advantage of but its not my place to say so, i've tried and oh boy did i cause trouble lol.

there are parents out there in top jobs who can afford to help pay their parents bills.

Personally I think they should be given something and also have health checks too ... tbh my mother inlaw isnt pyshically capable and I've never allowed my children to do a sleep over there. I've asked her to babysit 4 times in 8 years, out of those 4 she has only done it once and that was awful, I got home both my babies were wide awake and screaming, she was watching tv ignoring them saying they will cry themsleves back to sleep.

anyway yes to SUITABLE Grandparents gaining finacncial help

mandy moo
26-03-2009, 07:43 AM
I agree

My daughter in law is thinking of going back to work and I would hope that they would come to me first to care for my grandson and not to a stranger and why on earth would they even want to think of doing that

Angel xx

You Angel are fantastic,:) and would be the obvious choice, but if they didnt how would you feel? Would they offer to pay you for your service, would you take it if they did?
The problem I have is that my MIL lives on her own, she only has her pension (i think ive said in previous post shes 72 alibet a young one) my brother and sister in law dont give her/help out with food or anything else while my neices are with her. its not like they cant afford it.


And yes I know Its a matter for my family. But IM pretty sure there must be grandparents in the same position that could do with a little help.
We have child tax credits, why not a credit of some sort for grandparents, who can show it is only grandchildren they are looking after and not some one on the on the fiddle.
Or prehaps Im just simply being naive.

mandy moo
26-03-2009, 07:46 AM
I've been discussing this with my hubby this morning.

My mother in law claims carers allowance for her daughter who now has twins but more often than not she cant cope with them so MIL steps in daily to feed shop take them out and has them as overnight care. She is unpaid and has given up her social life to care for the twins aswell as her daughter.

I think maybe there would be a way for Grandparents to claim some form of carers allowance that will help to reinborse their heating and water bills and give them a little extra allowing them to provide the food without having to go without themselves.

I know in this case she gets c/a for her daughter and she is there daily anyway to assist her but used to go from 1pm till 5pm 5 days a wk and her SIL would do the evening and weekend care. Now she wakes at 5am gets there at 6am leaves when twins are sleeping by 9pm or takes them home with her for the night. she deserves to get something but her daughter cant afford to give anything at all.

I feel she is being taken advantage of but its not my place to say so, i've tried and oh boy did i cause trouble lol.

there are parents out there in top jobs who can afford to help pay their parents bills.

Personally I think they should be given something and also have health checks too ... tbh my mother inlaw isnt pyshically capable and I've never allowed my children to do a sleep over there. I've asked her to babysit 4 times in 8 years, out of those 4 she has only done it once and that was awful, I got home both my babies were wide awake and screaming, she was watching tv ignoring them saying they will cry themsleves back to sleep.

anyway yes to SUITABLE Grandparents gaining finacncial help

We must have posted at the same time shelly, I did mention it once in a round about way and was basically told to mind my own buisness.:(
My brotherin law and sister in law certainly can...

angeldelight
26-03-2009, 07:46 AM
You Angel are fantastic,:) and would be the obvious choice, but if they didnt how would you feel? Would they offer to pay you for your service, would you take it if they did?
The problem I have is that my MIL lives on her own, she only has her pension (i think ive said in previous post shes 72 alibet a young one) my brother and sister in law dont give her/help out with food or anything else while my neices are with her. its not like they cant afford it.


And yes I know Its a matter for my family. But IM pretty sure there must be grandparents in the same position that could do with a little help.
We have child tax credits, why not a credit of some sort for grandparents, who can show it is only grandchildren they are looking after and not some one on the on the fiddle.
Or prehaps Im just simply being naive.

Got to be honest I would do it for free but hubby would go mad ha

But they have all already said I would be first choice and they would pay like any other parent

I am not sure though how it works if grandparents do this - is it wise to work with family I wonder ?

Angel xx

huggableshelly
26-03-2009, 08:09 AM
We must have posted at the same time shelly, I did mention it once in a round about way and was basically told to mind my own buisness.:(
My brotherin law and sister in law certainly can...

I mentioned this to my Hubby and Brother in law too, they agree with me and my BIL tried to make his mum slow down and got told to mind his own business. He moved away from his mum due to work reasons as did hubby and me, and tbh I'm glad too as I feel I would have stepped in with the twins offering free care then would be putting MIL's nose out of joint.

I know what I think to it all in that situation but even so I do feel MIL should get something. ALSO ofcourse my sis inlaw gets her disability allownce which is an income she could give some to her.

omg ok i need to stop typing as its rattling my cage.

mandy moo
26-03-2009, 08:16 AM
I mentioned this to my Hubby and Brother in law too, they agree with me and my BIL tried to make his mum slow down and got told to mind his own business. He moved away from his mum due to work reasons as did hubby and me, and tbh I'm glad too as I feel I would have stepped in with the twins offering free care then would be putting MIL's nose out of joint.

I know what I think to it all in that situation but even so I do feel MIL should get something. ALSO ofcourse my sis inlaw gets her disability allownce which is an income she could give some to her.

omg ok i need to stop typing as its rattling my cage.

Me too:) unfortunatley its :( something I feel strongley about

huggableshelly
26-03-2009, 08:19 AM
Me too:) unfortunatley its :( something I feel strongley about

I guess really until the goverment decide to do something about it then we have to just leave them to it. I just hope the twins never come to any harm, luckily her bungalow is pretty child friendly apart from the fireplace.

mandy moo
26-03-2009, 08:25 AM
Got to be honest I would do it for free but hubby would go mad ha

But they have all already said I would be first choice and they would pay like any other parent

I am not sure though how it works if grandparents do this - is it wise to work with family I wonder ?

Angel xx

There is also that point also..

Pudding Girl
26-03-2009, 09:04 AM
If a grandparent registers as a CM then yes they are expected to look after other children, but this does not mean that they HAVE to/are forced to - just that they have to be seen to be advertising ;) and of course no-one suitable may come along for a long time, and even if people did visit they might not take your space ;)

we all know how hard it can be to get mindees - and what if one left, would they then be disbarred or whatever? Nope.

^^ from my DO by the way, not just my uninformed opinion.

happytotschildminding
26-03-2009, 09:30 AM
I can see both points of view - I myself paid my mum to look after our daughters (over 10 years ago now) but it worked so well, I tried to make sure mum didn't feel put upon, she enjoyed doing it, daughters enjoyed going, and it was the best choice for us and our circumstances.
Carol

barbarella68
26-03-2009, 10:55 AM
I personally think that it is ok for grandparents to look after children and get paid for it,I don't think it's anyone elses business but the people involved, but they should not be forced or bullied into doing it.:(

mummyroysof3
26-03-2009, 11:08 AM
the only problem is that when you help out family you dont get as much of a say than if you paying for a childs care, things can be strained between family members as it is and people take affence easily in some families, its very rare i need care for my children and obviously i would ask family to help out first but it has caused many problems and would definatly concider using a childminder for a regular care arangement as i feel you are better able to discuss your childs care, where as for example a parent may just do things their way and you feel like you cant have a say because it would upset them, does that make sense? im not very good at explaining what i mean:blush:

charlotte x

angeldelight
26-03-2009, 11:09 AM
I personally think that it is ok for grandparents to look after children and get paid for it,I don't think it's anyone elses business but the people involved, but they should not be forced or bullied into doing it.:(

I agree 100%

Angel xx

Schnakes
26-03-2009, 11:46 AM
You explained it much more clearly than I did as I assumed everyone knew that.

Being neither a grandparent or someone who uses a grandparent as a childcare option, Im not quite sure why I should automatically be privy to this sort of information.

I personally think that it is ok for grandparents to look after children and get paid for it,I don't think it's anyone elses business but the people involved

Exactly. So why should we, the tax payer, pay for it?

Its not grandparents looking after children that I object to (although in some cases I do)...it was the suggestion that it should be government funded. That is what I disagree with.

Sx

FizzysFriends
26-03-2009, 01:08 PM
I personally think that it is ok for grandparents to look after children and get paid for it,I don't think it's anyone elses business but the people involved, but they should not be forced or bullied into doing it.:(

I agree with this, but I also think the Government shouldn't help pay for it, it would be to open to fraud.

Tatia
26-03-2009, 04:06 PM
You explained it much more clearly than I did as I assumed everyone knew that.
Being neither a grandparent or someone who uses a grandparent as a childcare option, Im not quite sure why I should automatically be privy to this sort of information.


Yeah, that's sort of what assumed means. I assumed, Donna cleared up my vague point.:D

Princess Sara
26-03-2009, 04:18 PM
What I think Tatia is saying that if you are a registered grandparent for the childs parents to claim tax credit you must also have another mindee not a family member on your books also. I know this is a fact as I contacted tax credit when I was in the process of registering last year. Also Ofsted said they would not inspect me with just grandchildren present you need other mindees not family there also.:)

Things have changed since my mum was registered to look after ds1, but she was registered to look after him, and only looked after him, for about a year I think. That was 3 years ago. She had no intention of looking after anyone elses children at the time and so didn't. Ofsted had no problem with this, she was providing one-to-one care. She did not advertise for others either. When ds1 started pre-school at 3 a year later she did start minding other peoples children, but gave it all up a while later.

If grandparents want to register and do all the paperwork etc, then I think that's fine, they should be paid acordingly wheather they look after other peoples children or not. But unregistered care should not be paid for, it's family help and nothing more imo. If you want to pay grandparents out of your own pocket then go ahead, but I do not think the govenment should pay out of the taxpayers pocket.

mummyroysof3
26-03-2009, 04:39 PM
i agree with pincess sara, if family want to help out then fair enough give them some money towards it but why should it be classed as the same as a childminder or nursey and get government help?

charlotte x

Schnakes
26-03-2009, 06:26 PM
If grandparents want to register and do all the paperwork etc, then I think that's fine, they should be paid acordingly wheather they look after other peoples children or not. But unregistered care should not be paid for, it's family help and nothing more imo. If you want to pay grandparents out of your own pocket then go ahead, but I do not think the govenment should pay out of the taxpayers pocket.

Ah - you have summed up what I was trying to say!! Thank you! :thumbsup:

eah, that's sort of what assumed means. I assumed, Donna cleared up my vague point.

Oh - sorry - misunderstood. :)

Sx

Cammie Doodle
26-03-2009, 10:04 PM
I personally think that it is ok for grandparents to look after children and get paid for it,I don't think it's anyone elses business but the people involved, but they should not be forced or bullied into doing it.:(

I agree totally. What I learnt and experienced from my own Granparents was amazing and I thank my lucky stars that I was fortunate enough to be able to spend as much time with them as I did . My own Parent have always looked after my nephews for my sister to return to work (her choice) I did'nt have that luxury as we moved with Hubby job, and used to worry that my son was missing out. I think Grandparents are wonderful EDUCATORS and can teach a child many talents and skills without EYFS

Pauline
26-03-2009, 10:21 PM
Hey I am a grandparent and not anywhere near to retirment age and peace just yet thankyou very much

:laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

Angel xx

Me too - we are the trendy Granny and Nan aren't we Angel! :laughing:

Pauline
26-03-2009, 10:41 PM
if I choose to send my child to a grandparent instead of a registered minder, why shouldn't #1 I have that choice and #2 the grandparent be suitably reimbursed?

I totally agree with you Tatia, you should have the choice and that the grandparent should be reimbursed.

My argument with this current idea is that they are saying grandparents should be paid by the government, but why shouldn't they be paid the same as a childminder would be i.e. via the child tax credits, workplace schemes or by the parent? Otherwise to use a grandparent for care would be getting free childcare when others, who have no grandparents available would have to pay from their own pocket.

Seems unfair to me, unless I have misunderstood what they are suggesting. :rolleyes:

huggableshelly
26-03-2009, 10:52 PM
ikkle green pest floating around giggling at all the grannies in the forum

wonders off understanding that it would be fair for grannies to gain equivilant payments afterall grannies more often than not provide a more personal service ... cms do too but not like grannies who were created to spoil grandchildren with love (toys too but thats beside the point)

mandy moo
27-03-2009, 09:21 AM
I always think of grannies as stooped with a stick and grey hair in a bun, and at least 70 yrs old. :eek:

No offence to the grannies on here specially the 2 above:blush:

So how long before the little green pest becomes green then?
I just noticed your post count Shelly:eek:

Pauline
27-03-2009, 09:37 AM
I always think of grannies as stooped with a stick and grey hair in a bun, and at least 70 yrs old. :eek:

No offence to the grannies on here specially the 2 above:blush:

So how long before the little green pest becomes green then?
I just noticed your post count Shelly:eek:

None taken - I will just hit you with my stick :laughing:

Don't encourage LGP :eek: - she is waiting patiently :rolleyes:

angeldelight
27-03-2009, 10:06 AM
I always think of grannies as stooped with a stick and grey hair in a bun, and at least 70 yrs old. :eek:

No offence to the grannies on here specially the 2 above:blush:

So how long before the little green pest becomes green then?
I just noticed your post count Shelly:eek:


OMG OMG

How mean is that

:laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

I have blonde hair and im def not 70 haha

I do know what you mean though


One of the children told me that I cant be a nan because I am not old
Bless

Angel xx

Tatia
27-03-2009, 07:11 PM
I see what you're saying Pauline. I don't know enough about the debate to know the ins and outs but I would think that if people are using grandparents that their ability to pay should still be means tested same as being funded to pay a cm or nursery.

Tatia
27-03-2009, 07:14 PM
I have blonde hair and im def not 70 haha
Angel, I thought your hair was blue or pink or something like that?:laughing: Wasn't there an unfortunate event with hair dye?

Ooooh, I just twigged! I'm gonna be a granny in October! And I'm just 38!!!! At least I'll be in good company. :D

angeldelight
27-03-2009, 07:15 PM
Angel, I thought your hair was blue or pink or something like that?:laughing: Wasn't there an unfortunate event with hair dye?

Ooooh, I just twigged! I'm gonna be a granny in October! And I'm just 38!!!! At least I'll be in good company. :D

:laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

xx

Pauline
27-03-2009, 08:20 PM
I see what you're saying Pauline. I don't know enough about the debate to know the ins and outs but I would think that if people are using grandparents that their ability to pay should still be means tested same as being funded to pay a cm or nursery.

I must admit I don't know more than has been bandied around on the radio and media, but yes, if it goes ahead and people need help to pay then they should get it whether they pay a nursery, cm or gran.

Schnakes
27-03-2009, 09:00 PM
if it goes ahead and people need help to pay then they should get it whether they pay a nursery, cm or gran

But why should the government fund paying grandparents? And of course, by government I mean - me, you and everybody else who pays taxes.

Sx

Schnakes
27-03-2009, 09:02 PM
I paid over £2000 in taxes this tax year. Id like to think that my money is going to the NHS/schools/to fund an illegal war in Iraq (okay, the last one was a joke!!) than to pay granny to potter around after her grandchild.

Sx

LOOPYLISA
27-03-2009, 09:08 PM
I must admit I don't know more than has been bandied around on the radio and media, but yes, if it goes ahead and people need help to pay then they should get it whether they pay a nursery, cm or gran.

I agree :thumbsup:

Pauline
27-03-2009, 09:08 PM
if it goes ahead and people need help to pay then they should get it whether they pay a nursery, cm or gran

But why should the government fund paying grandparents? And of course, by government I mean - me, you and everybody else who pays taxes.

Sx

Why not, it would be the same as paying a cm or nursery if the parent could not afford it on their income.

You seem to be missing the point Schnakes, I'm agreeing with you. :rolleyes:

Pauline
27-03-2009, 09:12 PM
than to pay granny to potter around after her grandchild.

Sx

I don't 'potter around with my grandchild' Schnakes, I help educate and entertain them to become happy, content, individuals with a lust for life. :)

Schnakes
27-03-2009, 09:25 PM
But Pauline - YOU ARE A CHILDMINDER!!! Of course you do those things. :) Please refer to my earlier post re: RBC having such concern over a certain group of grandparents looking after their grandchildren that they had a huge program about it.

Seriously. They focussed on children entering nursery at some schools that a high number of children from this background go to and the children (3/4 years old) had NEVER seen or played with toys before. I find that really shocking. Thats not good for the kids is it? Thats not what you or Angel or any other of the "grannies" on this thread see as a good childcare option, surely, when the children have never even been given the opportunity even to play with toys?

Why not, it would be the same as paying a cm or nursery if the parent could not afford it on their income.

No it wouldnt. Childminders and nurseries are trained proffessionals...

Sorry Pauline, but Im not sure that we are agreeing?!! :( Maybe Im not reading you right...I already got Tatia wrong on this thread...it could happen again! :o


Sx

Pauline
27-03-2009, 09:36 PM
Schnakes - The thread is about whether a grandparent should be paid by the government to care for their grandchild.

I say no. They should be paid the same way as a nursery or childminder, by way of parent payment, vouchers, company schemes, tax credits etc. not by the government as that is not fair on those parents who pay for their care that way and cannot get 'free' (proposed government funded) care with grandparents.

That way parents would not be put in the position of taking advantage of the 'free' care and therefore using grandparents who are not fit and able to care for little ones.

Schnakes
27-03-2009, 09:38 PM
Ah ha - so I DID get it wrong!! My apologies Pauline - thank for for explaining to me...in my defense, I have a cold. I think its affecting my brain...!!!! :doh:

Sx

Pauline
27-03-2009, 09:41 PM
Ah ha - so I DID get it wrong!! My apologies Pauline - thank for for explaining to me...in my defense, I have a cold. I think its affecting my brain...!!!! :doh:

Sx

No need to apologise S, I love a good debate. :thumbsup:

Schnakes
27-03-2009, 09:47 PM
Heh - me too...have you ever wandered over to the Guardians talkboards? If you are ever having a stressful day, go over there and let rip at some poor unsuspecting fool...anything and everything goes over there...and the more pompous you are the more fun it is!! LOL!!! Its vicious but in a fun way!

Sx

Pauline
27-03-2009, 09:50 PM
and the more pompous you are the more fun it is!! LOL!!! Its vicious but in a fun way!

Sx

Ahhh.....now I see your game plan :D

angeldelight
27-03-2009, 10:06 PM
Ahhh.....now I see your game plan :D


:laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

xxx

Tatia
28-03-2009, 08:25 AM
That's why I like this website. People generally respect each other's views and agree to disagree in a respectful manner.

Except Pauline and Angel. They bash everyone!:eek: :ROFL1:

donnadoo2004200
28-03-2009, 09:05 AM
WELLDONE EVERYONE from another GRANNY (REGISTERED)

Schnakes
28-03-2009, 10:24 PM
That's why I like this website. People generally respect each other's views and agree to disagree in a respectful manner.

Oh for gods sake...

Yeah...I like this website for the reason above - I dont generally go round here like I would on the Guardian talk board because this is a place where I respect the people here and am genuinely interested in their views. Do you actually go on the other website? The whole baiting thing is done in high spirits - its totally different to this website. Its not even slightly the same. I jokingly suggested to Pauline that she might try it. I cant be bothered with this anymore, tbh. :(

s.