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View Full Version : oops i think ive upset a parent!



sammy
14-03-2009, 07:20 PM
basically i have a 2 and 4 year old once a week 3 til 7, when the parent drops them off the girl has worn flip - flops and a few times worn dressing up shoes, but lately summer shoes. and also a very thin top, normally summer tops and a coat thats not very warm. The boy has even come in a pj top, which is also very thin-but normally is just a t-shirt, and trousers too wide for him, once we walked to school and they fell down and revealed his willy!! as he doesnt wear pants!!

Anyway the parent knows we go out and do school run, so not as if they need to wear summer clothes as we dont stay indoors. Last week we went out for a walk in the woods and the little 2 were shivering so i had to come home (i have put my kids jumpers on them before) but this day didnt realise how windy it was. Anwyay they normally have coughs and colds etc.

So i wrote in the mums diary that we went out and was really cold, so if she could put a jumper and wellys in there bag, incase we go out for walks would be good. Anyway she text me to say have made a mental note to dress my kids more warmly and will supply wellies too - then she said i feel quite told off! i certainly didnt come across like i was telling her off. But why should i have to point the obvious out (also i did say in the beginning to have spare clothes which she does give me a spare t-shirt each and pants) but no warm clothes!!

I also updated some of my policies one included a sickness policy and sent copys out same day - funnily enough she bought her child with a cough and cold, (she did phone to ask if she could still bring him, i said it was ok) she also added another text saying - i hope we havnt broken your rules by bringing him to your place today - so was no need for that .

haribo
14-03-2009, 07:57 PM
i wouldt worry about it and like you said you are only pointing out the obvious- that her children need suitable clothes ! if she feels shes had a telling off thats her problem not yours if you put it politely . i agree there was no need for the second text if it was sarcastic but maybe it wasnt , id just stay polite and not let it get to you x

amirose
14-03-2009, 08:11 PM
I agree with the above, you did the right thing and your putting the children's best interest at heart :thumbsup:

Remember texts can be read and interpreted in a number of ways due to the lack of body language and tone of voice/context its said in. Mum was probably embarrassed at having someone else prompt her to dress kids more warmly (her fault though not yours) which is what sparked the comment.

brillminder
14-03-2009, 08:14 PM
i think parents dont want to tell the children no some times and they travel in the car and dont see we have to go out what ever the weather lol keep on it :thumbsup:

Pipsqueak
14-03-2009, 08:43 PM
But thats it - kids get ferried around everywhere in the car by parents/g-parents and the need for appropriate clothing isn't there. No matter how many times your tell parents - either in their rush or they just don't think the kids more often than not arrive in less than suitable clothing.

I use my sons clothes for the kids if necessary and as he outgrows them, I will keep a small selection for these types of situations. I also ask parents to leave me at least one set of spare clothes here (and only one parent has ever done so).

christine e
14-03-2009, 08:54 PM
I agree with the above, you did the right thing and your putting the children's best interest at heart :thumbsup:

Remember texts can be read and interpreted in a number of ways due to the lack of body language and tone of voice/context its said in. Mum was probably embarrassed at having someone else prompt her to dress kids more warmly (her fault though not yours) which is what sparked the comment.

I agree text messages can be misinterpreted mum's comments could have been made jokingly! I have recently sent e mail to people and they have not intepreted my comments they way I intended them to.

Cx

cher25
14-03-2009, 09:09 PM
Don't let this upset you. You were right in asking for extra clothes. And she should be dressing them in warmer clothes anyway. The way the weather has been this winter, it's more of a reason to make sure they are warm.
As for spare clothes, What are they??? lol Im still waiting for my mindee's parents to bring some.
:)

Daftbat
14-03-2009, 11:47 PM
I think you did the right thing. You will never be in the wrong if you have the childs best interest at heart. I also have parents who don't always supply spare clothing - have a whole cupboard full of stuff - sometimes my own things never end up coming back!

LittleStars
15-03-2009, 08:07 AM
I have taken to buying jumpers/ jackets/ gloves/ hats and spare tops and trousers for all my mindees from the carboot sale. I have a drawer of spares...that way if I don't think they are warm enough I can dress them up. I obviously have differing thoughts then my parents on how children should be wrapped up...I have a 10m old who never comes in a coat...even in the snow! and another little one who wears a t shirt and a raincoat..I asked and asked and asked for suitable clothing until I got too embarrased to ask anymore! I even have shoes here for one of my LOs as his are WAY too small for him!

I don't even hide it now. When the parents collect I say X let me have your jumper for your homebox...and off he goes home in his T shirt and raincoat!!!

I would be mortified if I were the parents...they don't even flinch!!! lol

Not an ideal solution...more of a last resort. But it works :-)

miffy
15-03-2009, 08:15 AM
Don't dwell on it - just remain professional :)

Miffy xx

mandy moo
15-03-2009, 08:35 AM
But thats it - kids get ferried around everywhere in the car by parents/g-parents and the need for appropriate clothing isn't there. No matter how many times your tell parents - either in their rush or they just don't think the kids more often than not arrive in less than suitable clothing.

I use my sons clothes for the kids if necessary and as he outgrows them, I will keep a small selection for these types of situations. I also ask parents to leave me at least one set of spare clothes here (and only one parent has ever done so).

I use my car a lot especially with my kids coz I live in a village and my husband and I's family live more than 5 miles away, our nearest supermarket is 7 miles away.
If its cold or raining etc I still dress my kids in coats and stuff, if we are in the car, simply because its gonna be horrible once we get out.
I dont get the whole thing personally.
It only takes a little bit of common sense.

I had one mindee walk to my house in trainers, long sleeve t-shirt and coat, no jumper under that tho, during all that snow. :eek: no spare jeans which were soaked thro had to give her a pair of mine. Which come to think of it i dont think I got back!!:(
MY other mindee (his mum is norweigen,shes lovley) has been coming to me in wooley tights under his jeans and water proof snow boots since september:)

samgeordie
15-03-2009, 12:34 PM
you did the right thing and are thinking of the childs needs. One of my mindees was dropped off in just tights and a top 2 times in one week, the mum thought it was ok and there were waterproof trousers in her bag for the school run. The 3rd time it happened i just said to the mum that when she is at mine can she please make sure her daughter has bottoms on, for her own protection when playing and doing activities and also if we were going out to the library,shops etc.

helenlc
15-03-2009, 04:43 PM
My 2 yr old mindee came a couple of time this week in just a hooded sweatshirt and body warmer thing - perfectly warm but not waterproof!

So when we walked to the local Childrens Centre on Friday afternoon and it looked like it was going to rain, I had to take the buggy and raincover otherwise he would have got soaked through. (He did still walk but it meant I had to take the buggy when I didnt need to)

I have an old pink pac-a-mac of my daughters that i have used on girl mindees before - it has drowned them but kept them dry when they have turned up in just cardigans, if that. I am going to look out for a pac-a-mac to keep at my house for my mindee incase we have another day where it looks like rain and he doesnt have his waterproof coat on.

I had a girl last year turn up in crocs - which was fine except we were going to the farm and I had warned Mum of this!! We didnt end up going that day as I didnt want to pick horse/cow/chicken poop out of her toes where they had gone through the holes in the crocs!! :eek: