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View Full Version : mum wanted to come and stay at mine too with her son!?!



sammy
04-02-2009, 09:05 AM
as the snow has been bad i havnt had one of the children i care for all week and as i normally collect him (not contracted though) i text her to say could she bring him to me. She phoned to say that He has been asking for me and sitting next to the door with his shoes on (hes only 2).

Anyway she said i really want to bring him, then continues to say maybe i can stay with him and just let him have a little play time with you. i dont think she wanted to make 2 journeys here due to the snow, although not sure how she would get to me anyway.

The thing is, she would probably think she wouldnt pay for this.

Would any of you have the parent and child to play during their childminded hours? I feel i just like to get on with my job and if she wanted to have "play time" then arrange another time thats more convenient for me.

Twinkles
04-02-2009, 09:07 AM
No sorry I wouldn't be happy with that. Can you just say you can't have her there due to ofsted restrictions - ie she's not crb checked ?

Blaze
04-02-2009, 09:08 AM
No sorry I wouldn't be happy with that. Can you just say you can't have her there due to ofsted restrictions - ie she's not crb checked ?

...As above!:)

marion123
04-02-2009, 09:11 AM
it depends on how well you get on with the mum and if you have other plans

sammy
04-02-2009, 09:13 AM
i just said i will probably be out and about in the garden with the kiddies. But shes not crb checked either,

mum22
04-02-2009, 09:15 AM
Hi
Would it just be here son there with you, if so then i guess it depends if you want her there but make it clear she has to pay. If you have others then no I agree that you should go down the not crb checked. Personally I wouldn't want a mindees mum around as none of us would act as we would normally iyswim;)

katickles
04-02-2009, 09:25 AM
I wouldn't. I'd try along the lines of Ofsted restictions & it not being faor on the other children as they would want there mummy to stay & play to which would cause confusion.

http://newtickers.bump-and-beyond.com/26/2694/269483.png (http://www.bump-and-beyond.com/)

wendywu
04-02-2009, 09:25 AM
No i would not do this. She would also have to CRB checked.:panic:

ajs
04-02-2009, 09:46 AM
sorry but why would she be crb checked if she was playing with her own son and you didn't leave her with the other children at any times.

one of my mums was working from home yesterday, had to drop into the post office near where i live so called in for a cupof tea E was trhilled to see her mum and not at all bothered that mum left 10 mins later as she was too busy playing with her friends to notice
i love the fact that the mums feel they can drop in,

i have an open door policy too, although generally if i have the little ones the parents are busy so don't get a chance to drop in.
i thiok it's important for the children to see mum/dad and minder getting on well

Rubybubbles
04-02-2009, 09:51 AM
sorry but why would she be crb checked if she was playing with her own son and you didn't leave her with the other children at any times.one of my mums was working from home yesterday, had to drop into the post office near where i live so called in for a cupof tea E was trhilled to see her mum and not at all bothered that mum left 10 mins later as she was too busy playing with her friends to notice
i love the fact that the mums feel they can drop in,

i have an open door policy too, although generally if i have the little ones the parents are busy so don't get a chance to drop in.
i thiok it's important for the children to see mum/dad and minder getting on well

excatly my thought!!

I wouldn;t want her their just for a play date, but if she wanted to come and have a coffee and watch him play with others then as above, open door poilicy! If it's not a contracted day though then I would say no, if it is then you say sure, but I will still be charging as per contract;)

ajs
04-02-2009, 09:55 AM
oh yes i didn't mention of course i would be charging mum for the privilege

Rubybubbles
04-02-2009, 09:59 AM
oh yes i didn't mention of course i would be charging mum for the privilege

hehe most important bit Mands

wendywu
04-02-2009, 10:02 AM
Yes i suppose as long as she signed the visitors book and was at no time left alone with the other children then it would be ok.

Twinkles
04-02-2009, 10:24 AM
I think the point was Sammy was looking for an excuse/reason not to have her there as she felt the mum wouldn't want to pay.

Rubybubbles
04-02-2009, 10:28 AM
I think the point was Sammy was looking for an excuse/reason not to have her there as she felt the mum wouldn't want to pay.

we know that lol

but as a good childminder she should have an open door policy and unless she had plans else where;) I think it's good pracitse to say come on over (and charge lol, you can;t say no you can't but bring the child, it doesn't happen very often that a parent wants to share some time together:laughing: , in my case, I collect the kids and drop them back off, I have invited them to visit during the day to see how they get on but nothing so far!!

sammy
04-02-2009, 10:33 AM
yes that was one of the main points, plus i dont mind parents watching there children play-i dont have anything to hide and i would welcome a great relationship between mindee/parent and childminder, but she made it sound that instead of me minding him then they will come and play instead. which i am happy to do when its arranged in my time, but not when im supposed to be paid for having him.

Twinkles
04-02-2009, 10:33 AM
I feel I'm a good childminder but I don't have an open door policy. And I would have said yes you can bring the child but you can't stay.

deeb66
04-02-2009, 10:45 AM
I think you are all good childminders regardless of whether you have an open door policy or not as everyone works differently.

I wouldn't have had mum sitting there either as I find that it disrupts everyone and the day.

Having said that if a parent booked time to come and see me for a specific reason then that would be a different matter.

As there was no specific reason other than can't be bothered to walk back and forwards I too would be saying "sorry it is not convenient"

haribo
04-02-2009, 11:50 AM
i agree with dee-whilst an open door policy is the ideal it is not the most practical i have my hands full whilst working and wouldt relish having to accomodate a parent. yes if its a settling in arrangement but no way just to make a parent life easier .. sorry :panic:

mushpea
04-02-2009, 11:53 AM
how about saying somthing like 'yes pop in with him for a coffee if you like, but i have to go out at (give a time 30mins after she gonna arrive) at which point you can either let him come or take him home again' at the said time if she dosent go you can then get the kids ready and if neccasery just walk round the block, fresh air good for them anyway.

mandy moo
04-02-2009, 02:14 PM
I get on well with all my parents,but They are not close FRIENDS, and Im not sure if I would want them sitting in my front room for more than 10-15 mins,
I wouldnt feel comfortable, I would feel I was being inspected..
AS daft as that might sound, thats me.
Would be diffrent tho of course is, as has been, said we'd booked a meeting to chat about any concerns they might have.

Rubybubbles
04-02-2009, 02:27 PM
I would just like to say that we all work differently and sorry if my post on this sounded harsh

It was what I would do:(

I have pm'd and said sorry for causing offence

ChocolateChip
04-02-2009, 02:36 PM
Guess you just have to make it clear that if it is a normal day for the lo she is still liable to pay, although welcome to 'pop in' if you are comfortable with that- if not take the good advice that others have given about how to get out of it.

haribo
04-02-2009, 02:41 PM
rubybubbles i dont see any need for you to apologise :)

madasahatter
04-02-2009, 02:50 PM
It's funny how different people have different views isn't it? I have an open door policy of sorts though it rarely gets used. One of my parents often stayed for an hour or so when she dropped off her eldest child (age 2) when she was on her maternity. It was great. We were able to talk about so many aspects of her boys learning. She also used it as a good opportunity to get ideas about the EYFS (she is a key stage 2 teacher and she knew she was going to return to school in the reception class). It was handy having someone to bounce ideas off (and vice versa!)

SimplyLucy
04-02-2009, 03:13 PM
What a fantastic idea, you can put a bit in the childs EYFS folder about working in partnership with parents. :D

sammy
04-02-2009, 03:20 PM
i only have him for 2 hours, so it seems pretty pointless for her staying for half an hour and then go, she just wanted for him to come and play with the toys - i think she looks as it being a toddler group!! but yes ive had her around before in the holidays for play time (only have him term time), and me and other parents have chats on the phone for 15-20 mins about other stuff too, not just about there kids which is nice. I wouldnt actually let them know i have an open house - they would try and abuse it - i know what they can be like

But as im supposed to be working for her this morning for 2 hours, i just thought, she would think if she came to play she wouldnt pay, plus i am so busy and like to get on with activities without a parent to keep amused too.

i could of charged to care for her too (the parent) !! haha

deeb66
04-02-2009, 04:09 PM
I would just like to say that we all work differently and sorry if my post on this sounded harsh

It was what I would do:(

I have pm'd and said sorry for causing offence

I don't think you caused offense sweetie.......you were just expressing your opinion :D

deeb66
04-02-2009, 04:10 PM
It's funny how different people have different views isn't it? I have an open door policy of sorts though it rarely gets used. One of my parents often stayed for an hour or so when she dropped off her eldest child (age 2) when she was on her maternity. It was great. We were able to talk about so many aspects of her boys learning. She also used it as a good opportunity to get ideas about the EYFS (she is a key stage 2 teacher and she knew she was going to return to school in the reception class). It was handy having someone to bounce ideas off (and vice versa!)

I have no problem with this in fact I would welcome it - I would just like it to be booked and arranged rather than last minute thing