View Full Version : Much needed advice after pretty horrendous day

Clever Clogs
12-12-2008, 07:43 AM
Hi everyone

Am looking for some pointers after a long sressful dy yesterday. Had some after school children for the full day due to their school being closed and whether it was the exitement of not going to school or what but they were high as kites all day and into everything. I also had an 18 month old, a 10 month old and a 3 year old and I think I spent the whole day running about after the older two. I thought I would be organised and have little cards ready for them to make xmas cards - that was fine and lsted for all of 15 mins where the mess was unbeleievalbe. #Got them to tidy it away (most of) as they said were finished went off to play with some toys (emptied all the aby toys everywhere) asked to make more cards, spotted the decoration kits we were going to make so asked for them, done that, 1 of themput two bits of glitter on one and said "I'm finished". Went through an argument of who wanted to play lay station, wouldn't eat lunch when made it then kept asking for food - then . . . the biggy. Asked for hamma beads so I set them up a place in the hall out the road of the one baby left by this time and they scattered hundreds of them on the floor. Told them they had lost their stickers for the day and to pick them up, told them the hazards left them to tidy, checked again and they were actually throwin them at each other! Needless to say they are now banned. Had already given them time out earlier - first time I have had to do it and am now wondering how today will be with half day at school.

My hubby suggested making set times for arts and crafts etc which I normally do but usually one doesn't want to do it - he goes and plays ps2 for little while then sometimes decides he will join in, by which time the others are nearly finished and goaway to pull out toys and there is mess everywhere. What do I do? I feelby telling them they either do this or that at a set time and if they don't want to do it they can read a book, do a jigsaw, something that doesn't need my attention is restricting their choices?

What do you all do? Yesterday I just felt the wee ones esp my son was't etting any attention and that's really not fair, th only attention they got was getting nappies changed, feeding etc, even then was getting asked "When can you get this?", "When can we do that?" "Are you ready yet?"

Advice greatly appreciated.


12-12-2008, 07:48 AM
Set a timetable up for the older ones with their imput, then get them to design it between themselves (should kill some time):D & put it on display ...with some freeplay (obviously not hamma beads though)...& stick to it!;)

12-12-2008, 07:50 AM
Poor you. How old are they? Maybe a review of house rules is necessary. Or get them to suggest some rules which I find helps them understand them better. Have you got them in Xmas hols? I am lucky in that I have a seperate room for my older ones and most of them are 11 and have been with me since they were 4 so they know the rules around lo's. Do you have enough age appropriate toys for them?

12-12-2008, 07:52 AM
LOL...was just coming back to suggest a house rules talk!

Also why not draw up behavioural "contracts" with them...I do this with all my over 8's.:)

12-12-2008, 07:59 AM
Oh dear - just wanted to say hope you have a better day today

Miffy xx

12-12-2008, 09:04 AM
The exictement is probably a mixture of christmas (I think the schools do a great job of winding them up to breaking point with christmas plays and class parties and christmas lunches etc etc etc).

I agree - a timetable was exactly what I was going to suggest - with their imput and put where they can see it so that they can even refer to what is happening next. Ensure there is time for everything they enjoy - so for example 9am - 10am - construction session with lego etc etc, 10 am -1015- snack time, 10.15- 11.15 computer games or colouring. etc etc etc.

If they dont want to do what is timetabled then sitting down with the book box is the alternative - and I would be quite stict with this. If a child doesnt want to join in I would offer this alternative but also point out that we aren't doing this for very long so just join in for a little while and you tell me what we are doing next.

I think you'll probably find that they enjoy the timetable and looking on it to see what is happening next and hopefully it will calm them down. I would keep the activity times quite short to maintain attention span. Once they have got into the flow of being a little calmer then you can always relax things again.

Good Luck

miss mopple
12-12-2008, 09:10 AM
I find with the big ones that the only way to keep my sanity is to go out somewhere. Even if its just a trip to the library- it breaks the day up and help diffuse things. We walk there and back if we can (kills more time :laughing: )

How about getting them to do stuff to have a cinema afternoon. Get them to make tickets, pop popcorn etc and really make a big thing of it before settling down to a nice xmas movie. Mine love this :thumbsup:

A timetable is a great idea :thumbsup:

12-12-2008, 09:23 AM
oh u poor thing u are not alone we all have days when we expected to do the impossible, firstly i ban the playstation i dont let them do any of that in my setting. I do have a set time for crafts and free play, try making yourself a plan and put one up on the wall so parents can see it.

Hope it goes well

christine e
12-12-2008, 09:23 AM
I think older children find in hard being indoors all day. When I have older ones we normally go out in the mornings and let them burn off some energy then inthe afternoon the little ones often have a sleep and the older ones can watch tv or have what they want out, I also have a wii which occupies them no end


12-12-2008, 02:00 PM
You poor thing, what a dreadful time.

Hope today went better for you

If you ahve to do it again, could you take a football over to the park and get them to run off some of the excess energy? - works for mine, lol!

Hama beads are a nightmare to pick up, I have to admit that I have never let the mindees play with ours but they are still a bit young yet anyway...

Clever Clogs
12-12-2008, 10:01 PM

Just wanted to thank everyone for their great advice - I did have a better day today. I took some tips and typed up a timetable and explained it to the two older kids when they came in. They were quite taken with it and every so often asked what time is it and what was it we were doing next? Having te 9 month old meant time overlapped with his feeding, changing etc so were maybe a bit out at times but did go better than expected. I told the kids today that I had picked the activities - all of which they seemed happy about but they could have input for next weeks activities which also worked well.

So thanks for your help - you saved my sanity today. The older ones are 5 and 6, the middle one 3 and t be honest he was the best behaved and the one with the longest staying power while doing crafts. Am going to try out the timetable way for the next wee while and see how we go.


13-12-2008, 12:29 AM
Glad you had a better day...now have a great weekend!:D

14-12-2008, 09:59 AM
sorry to hear about your awful day, sounds like the timetable worked well so hopefully this will make things easier for you.

I plan everyweek what I will be doing with the kids ive got, i look at their hours(cos they change week to week) for the week ahead and then plan timeslots of what we will do in that time(i ask the after school mindees what they would like to do). I do allow some free play and it does depend on which mindees i have, i know with some i need more structure and things planned as they behave better doing that, rather than being allowed free play when they tend to get a bit out of hand. Routine and structure definately help with a bit of planning - although that day you had it would have been hard to do that as it was unexpected to have the kids at home from school.

I also do "fun friday" for my after school mindee i have on a friday - if both her and my daughter are good in the week, they get to do a fun activity on the friday afternoon and they choose this activity(this is agreed at the beginning of the week). Its working well.

17-12-2008, 09:09 AM
Hope things are working out for you and you are feeling better now

Angel xx