I have a problem - please help!

[Little Bear]

I am having problems with a group of childminders in my area. They come up to me at school and claim very loudly that I leave children alone in the car, but they say it so loudly that everyone can hear. I do not leave the children alone as my mum is in the car and I have permission forms Crbs etc to allow this.
Another day another came up to me saying it has been noticed that I have too many children in my care, - this annoyed me as I have a variance on my registration to allow for this, and they are normally over on their numbers without permission. The funny thing is that one of them is no longer a registered childminder but is still minding!. This is really ....... me off at the moment as I don't know what I have done. Any suggestions :angry:

[kindredspirits]

sounds like jealousy - and bullying. i personally would tell them, quietly, where to go or you're phone might accidently start ringing ofsted and telling them about illegal minding and being over numbers.

[Pudding Girl]

Get in touch with your network co-ordinator or local development officer. I'd also make a copy of any variations etc to show them should they start on again - and if they continue to hassle you after that, I'd be thinking of solicitors letters tbh, this could seriously harm your business.

And report that illegal minder who is breaking the law! :censored:

[miss muffit]

sounds like jealousy - and bullying. i personally would tell them, quietly, where to go or you're phone might accidently start ringing ofsted and telling them about illegal minding and being over numbers.

I agree, they are bullying you, i would have a quiet word or just keep away from them
If it carries on i would phone ofsted yourself...just incase the nasty people report you
keep us updated
x

[Pipsqueak]

Sorry you are going through this - its bullying and harresment at the least.

I agree with getting in touch with your development officer and reporting it - you should not have to put up with this. I would also tell them calmly and quietly that you have no idea what their problem is but those in glass houses shouldn't throw stones - smile sweetly and then walk/turn away.
I would also write down every instance and circumstance of their harressment detailing what has been said and by whom.

How horrid of them

Think I would be reporting illegal childminding as well... after all those in glass houses!

[Mollymop]

Poor you, going through all this, it is bullying and they should know better!
I agree with the above- phone your dev. officer for advice, she should be able to help.
In the mean time, keep your head held high and dont let them get you down, hunny. xxxx

[Little Bear]

Thank you for your support

[angeldelight]

That is terrible poor you

I agree with everyone else

I would also stand well away from them with my back to them - if they speak to you then move away

Its nothing to do with them what you do - if you have everything in order then you have nothing to worry about

Hold your head in the air and ignore these petty people

Keep us posted

Angel xx

[Minnie mouse]

It sounds like there jealous because you have more children than them and they find you a threat. It really annoys me when people have to be so nasty to others, what is there problem! i would report her or perhaps someone else will over hear that shes working illegally and report her themselves if you see what i mean :rolleyes: keep your chin up dont let them get to you there bullys. And tell them straight that you are not the one working illegally!they have a nerve! :angry:

[Peppa]

I'm sorry you are going through this! Some people, I tell you, :mad:

I agree with above, some great advice.

[Michelle M]

Great advice, I cant add anything I just want to send you hugs and sorry you are going through this :group hug:

[Blaze]

Sorry you are going through this - its bullying and harresment at the least.

I agree with getting in touch with your development officer and reporting it - you should not have to put up with this. I would also tell them calmly and quietly that you have no idea what their problem is but those in glass houses shouldn't throw stones - smile sweetly and then walk/turn away.
I would also write down every instance and circumstance of their harressment detailing what has been said and by whom.

How horrid of them

Think I would be reporting illegal childminding as well... after all those in glass houses!


I agree...I've been there (& still am)...I had a vicious complaint made against me last year by 2 minders...after 3 months I was cleared by both OFSTED & SS...the best thing you can do is hold your head high & not give them the satisfaction...you don't need them, you have us!:group hug:

PS: I would however mention glass houses to them, as Pip suggests, but that's me!:D

[loocyloo]

oh little bear,

i feel sorry for you, wish i could offer some help, how horrid of them.

but as the others have said, hold your head up high, you know you are in the right. i would talk to some one, and probably phone ofsted, just to let them know that you are getting hassle, so that if they complain, you have got in first, if you know what i mean.

and i would probably report the minder working illegally.

good luck

xxx

[angeldelight]

Hope you are ok today

Angel xx

[Bushpig]

People like them make me mad... you hold your head high. I agree it must be jealousy... how petty. I wouldn't try and defend myself/enter into conversation with them even - they aren't worth it, and they are wanting a reaction from you... don't give it to them ;)

And I would start noting dates, times and who makes comments to you... perhaps even letting them see you taking out a notebook every time they talk to you... just say you're 'making notes'... ;)

[Spangles]

That's really dreadful, what horrible people. Wouldn't want anyone like that looking after my child.

I would report what's happening to your development officer just incase they phone Ofsted and try to cause you more trouble - don't want to scare you but they do sound very nasty and vindictive and I think you should think to protect yourself.

Also, write down every incidence from now on in a diary; date, what's said, where, etc. Also write down what you remember has happened so far. Write evidence that they are making false accusations, ie. your mum's CRB, etc.

Other than that I agree that you should just try to blank them, hopefully they will get bored, leave you alone and they can get back to their sad little lives.

[Andrea08]

BIG HUGGS your way hun i agree with the above and this is ANTI-BULLYING WEEK!!!

you must ring ofsted and inform that they are giving you verble complaints and that you are not in breach of your registration!!

then write it up as a reflection of your childminding, (this will help with the anger inside too)

write a letter informing of your variation and how your mother has crb etc and add a complaints form....lol .... give to the bullys and say..."SO you think i am in breach of my registration ??? please fill in the Legal complints form as im sure you all understand EYFS and its requirements and return it to me i then have 28days to get back to you with any referance to your complaint oh and dont bother i have already informed Ofsted and they will be happy to look into ALL local childminders to see who is or is not in breach of registrations!!!:p i hope that will help with any confusions and i also am seeking legal advice concerning SLANDER, as your public comments could harm my buisness,,

as sarcasticly as possible im sure it will shut them up, I HATE BULLYS.

all said i do wish you lots of luck and yes hold your head up high and if ofsted show up advertise the outcomes as im sure you will get a GOOD if not OUTSTANDING!!!

xxxxxxx

[Ripeberry]

This is why i'm going to be a bit wary of getting in touch with other childminders in my area as my old childminder used to say they were a back stabbing lot and she was really experienced and outgoing.
I'm just a shy little thing:p .
This would be my worst nightmare!:panic:

[Spangles]

There are a lot more lovely childminders out there than nasty ones!

Look at everyone on here for a start!

If you're worried, can you talk to your dev officer and ask them if they can recommend anyone for you to get in contact with or introduce you to or find you a childminding group to go to?

[mandy moo]

i too would be tempted to take copies of everything, and in a VERY LOUD VOICE say well here is all my documentaiton, does anyone want a look . if no one offers to take you up on it, take it to them and shove it under their noses..:p take someone with you for moral support?

sorry bullies cant stand them:angry: mandy

[nikim]

i cant beleive this from grown adults!!! are they having a go at you in front of children? ,i am disgusted !! and they r doing it as a group !!
i am lucky that although we live in a village with 4 other minders and we all are good friends and we welcome new minders with open arms,
i am sorry you are going through this, minding can be a very lonely job how did they manage when they were new ?
we r not all like that xxxx

[Hebs]

I would have a private word with the head of the school too as it is happening in school grounds, maybe he can tell them that if they continue to do this around other parents and children then they'll have no choice but to ban them from the school grounds.
they can make it out the ANOTHER parent has complained to them about whats going on :thumbsup:

[ChocolateChip]

Sorry to hear you're having to put up with this ****!
Excellent advice already given about taking notes of what has been said.
It's probably best to rise above it, as you are doing, however hard that may be, and not get into a slanging match in front of the kids, they're probably trying to provoke you so they can report that!
Go on, get someone to dob 'em in!!:D

[bubbly]

Like the others above me, I'm so sorry to hear what you're going through. I have a parent of a girl in my son's class at school who tries to intimidate me every day in the playground at collection time. Yesterday I walked home a different route to avoid her. People like these are plain ignorant and should get their facts straight before making false accusations.

You sound like a brilliant minder who has everything in order and puts the care of the children first. Don't let the :censored: 's get you down.

[Little Bear]

I have spoken to my development officer this afternoon and I have her full backing as she is aware of the issues/unfriendlyness of this group. She has told me I am doing nothing wrong but not to sink to their level.
It is so nice to hear your support, thank you :blush:

[yummymummy]

Poor you, what a horrible experience to have to go through. Although I think I have probably missed out on a lot this is the reason why I have never gone to childminder groups etc.
I agree this is bullying and they want people to think "no smoke without fire"
it seems as if they are trying to ruin your reputation as you are so busy and they are jealous. It is great news that your developmnet officer is behind you and is aware of this group should there be any further accusations.:thumbsup:

[DudleyChildmind]

It's disgusting the way they are treating you and they aren't very good role models for the children are they :angry:

I'm glad they don't look after my children!

[Heaven Scent]

Some people are so full of poison - there is a mum at my daughters school who watches everyone and has plenty to say about them all. She spent 2 years trying to forge a friendship between my DD and her DD and they did begin to become quite good friends until out of the blue she decided to latch onto another girl in the class so my DD was cast aside. When she was into my DD I had a conversation with her about my minding and my accounts and tax returns etc. anyway she is a cleaner and told me that she didn't pay tax or NI now as far as I'm concerned thats up to her - I know, I know its not fair but I still feel its her affair she doesn't claim anything except perhaps the family may be in receipt of tax credits or some sort or other. I know she charges £10.00 PH and probably works between 4-6 hrs per day.

Anyhow as she has nothing on me in this area and she knows that I know her business I think she is now trying to find some dirt on me. A few months ago I went to pick DD up from school after I'd been to collect the other mindees and I had just 1 seat available which was in the back row of my Citroen C8 so I hopped out and opened the tailgate and let her in that way rather than disturb the mindees in the middle row and off I went on my merry way. Then a couple of days later my morning assistant/cleaner asked me if my car was full the other day and did DD have to get in the boot - I thought she meant access her car via the tailgate and I said yes in all innocence. She said in reply that I should be very careful as S has been watching me and telling everyone that H had to sit in the boot. Well I really got a shock and said "Oh no, she got in through the back but there was a seat for her" I explained that she only used this access to save me disturbing another younger mindee and then I got really cross and told her to let this S know that DD had a proper seat and she always uses a seat belt and I would never carry any child in the boot of my car nor would I ever allow my child to travel in the boot of anyones car. - its absolutely amazing how often people like this can get the wrong end of the stick just so they have something to gossip about.

[LisaH]

What a shame you've found yourself in such a horrible situation little bear!!
At least you know you are doing things properly, it will come back and bite them on the bum sooner or later!!

It's just sad that these so called childminders give the rest of us a bad reputation:angry:

[emmadines]

caould you not htreaten to sue for slander??

what horrid people

[angeldelight]

I have spoken to my development officer this afternoon and I have her full backing as she is aware of the issues/unfriendlyness of this group. She has told me I am doing nothing wrong but not to sink to their level.
It is so nice to hear your support, thank you :blush:

Nice to know you have her full backing and support

Keep us posted

Angel xx

[tinyhands]

HI LITTLE BEAR, HOPE U GOT YOUR PROBLEM SORTED LET US KNOW!!!!
SHERON AKA TINYHANDS
PS NO CHILDMINDERS WHEN THERE WERE YOUNG:rolleyes:

[Chatterbox Childcare]

Wow what bitches. Sounds like the green eyed monsters are out in force (well it was Halloween not so long ago so maybe they will go away quickly)

My only comment regarding your first post was is your mum Ofsted approved as an assisant and covered by insurance and done her first aid. Might sound petty but just having the parents permission isn't enough and the bullys might just get you on this.

If I was you and all was in order I would tell them to "go away" in no uncertain terms and if you have your variance, let them report you as nothing will come of it. If Ofsted investigate, which I doubt, they will want to see your attendance records, so keep that spot on too.

Your bullys are like spots and eventually will disappear.

Hope they stop soon

[angiebubs]

Hi hun,

I really feel for you. I would keep a record of any harassment, what was said, who said it etc, and send a copy to Ofsted to keep on your file. I would definately report the lady who is not registered, these people give the rest of us a bad name.

Keep your chin up and be proud of the great job you are doing.

Love and Hugs.

Angie:littleangel:

[Jules27]

Everything has been said really but just wanted to offer my support, can't believe grown adults can be so nasty!!! Obviously they are jealous you are doing so well. You HAVE to report the woman who is minding illegaly hun!!

[Little Bear]

Just an update
One little boy was leaving my care today and to say goodbye I took the children out for dinner, we had a wonderful time and the children were really well behaved. When I got home I had only just shut the door when there was a knock at my door - OFSTED investigating 4 complaints ( strange there are 4 childminders in that group)

The complaints:
I leave children in the car on their own for periods of longer than 15 mins!
I am over my numbers
The children are in danger!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I queried the last one as this was a new one on me, apparantly I let the children hold hands when walking - they are brother & sister and walk next to the pushchair, Ofsted want me to use my double buggy and put the 2 youngest children in, they are nearly 3 and 3 years. I do use reins before anyone asks

Ofsted went through my paperwork and asked in depth questions, fine toothcomb with the attendance register and didn't find a thing wrong!!!!!!!!!

She will write a report and will suggest some things like the pushchair etc. I'll have to wait and see, but as you might imagine I am ......... off and can't believe their jelously.
Thanks for your support

[Twinkles]

OMG how do you prove you don't leave the children alone ? Is it enough to just deny it ?
I can't believe some people can be so petty , poor you , lets hope that's the last of it now.

[Ripeberry]

You need to fire off 4 complaints of your own. That will teach them! Especially the unregistered one.

[loocyloo]

big hugs to you.

glad ofsted didn't find anything wrong, just a few suggestions.

did you tell ofsted that you have been having trouble with these people? and that you have spoken to your development officer about it?

take care, thinking of you

xxxx

[Little Bear]

Hi, yes I have told them. My development officer says wait for the report then we will talk about it.

Did tell Ofsted about my problem and they said they will speak to my development officer to find out about them.

[miffy]

Just an update
One little boy was leaving my care today and to say goodbye I took the children out for dinner, we had a wonderful time and the children were really well behaved. When I got home I had only just shut the door when there was a knock at my door - OFSTED investigating 4 complaints ( strange there are 4 childminders in that group)

The complaints:
I leave children in the car on their own for periods of longer than 15 mins!
I am over my numbers
The children are in danger!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I queried the last one as this was a new one on me, apparantly I let the children hold hands when walking - they are brother & sister and walk next to the pushchair, Ofsted want me to use my double buggy and put the 2 youngest children in, they are nearly 3 and 3 years. I do use reins before anyone asks

Ofsted went through my paperwork and asked in depth questions, fine toothcomb with the attendance register and didn't find a thing wrong!!!!!!!!!

She will write a report and will suggest some things like the pushchair etc. I'll have to wait and see, but as you might imagine I am ......... off and can't believe their jelously.
Thanks for your support

So sorry to read this - there seems to be nothing that some people won't stoop to. It's hard to believe we are all doing the same job!

I'm glad your development officer is supporting you and hope that the Ofsted inspector realises these are malicious complaints. Personally I think her idea of putting two 3 year olds in a double buggy is ridiculous but if that's all she can find to say then really it's nothing is it?

Hope you're feeling OK today. Keep your chin up and remember you can always "talk" to us

Miffy xx

[Ripeberry]

Try and have a nice weekend :)