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View Full Version : anything i can do to ease the handover?



butterfly
29-10-2008, 06:51 PM
a couple of my older children (4 and 6) play up a little when their mum arrives at collection time and are causing their mum stress (to the point of crying). for example they won't put their shoes and coats on - they're just playing her up because they don't like the fact that she's gone back to work!

is there anything i can do to ease the stress? i try to chivvy them along but i don't the mum to get upset that they only play her up.

mum2two
29-10-2008, 06:56 PM
Most of mine do this! I tend to get their shoes on about 5 mins before mum is due to arrive, and that way, if they are playing up, mum can just grab coast & bags and drag them out. :thumbsup:

Works quite well, and stops them running of & being silly, as worse case scenario is they haven't got their coats on, but a 30 sec walk to the car won't kill them

xx

Twinkles
29-10-2008, 06:57 PM
Ask her to call you when she's five minutes away and you can get their shoes on ready , I bet they don't play you up do they ?
I also use a sticker reward system if any of mine get silly at home time. If they're really good they can have a sticker to take home. I'm quite strict about it though any silliness - no sticker.

cuddlybunny38
29-10-2008, 06:59 PM
Could you get her to prank you few mins before arrival so you can have them ready to go, then she could ring you later for a chat about their day instead of maybe chatting at pick up, or maybe you could take them out to her, not really sure what does she feel will help?

Fairydust
29-10-2008, 07:00 PM
I agree! I always get them ready 5 mins before Mum arrives as its mayhem & I often think makes Mum uneasy as she doesnt know how to deal with the behaviour in front of me. I sat down two of my mindees and explained that their behaviour was not acceptable when Mum arrives. They were using chairs to climb up onto my worktops!!! They are normally little Angels - I dont know what happens to them the minute Mum or Dad knocks on the door as they turn into devil children!!!:angry: :angry:

busylizzie
29-10-2008, 07:04 PM
I also have found this a problem in the past.

The way I deal with it is by writing a "handing over of responsibility" policy which I discuss with the parents when they join. I explain to them that this can be diffulcult time for both parents,child and childminder eg who is in charge of the child at that time?, children getting excited or a bit silly etc.

I explain that I am happy for them to come in and see what the children have been doing and have a quick chat etc but when they arrive it is their responsibility to look after their own children as I need to care for the others.

We discuss how "ready" they would like them to be and I try to have every thing ready in the hallway for them eg pictures,coats,shoes etc and I give them a copy of the house rules and childrens behaviour policy (written by the children themselves) so they know how to follow on the rules that I teach the children in my care.

Hope that helps:)

manjay
29-10-2008, 07:27 PM
I have this with one set of children but my rules are still applicable even when a parent is in my house. I always have everything ready in the hall and they are completely ready with shoes and coats on when Mum is due to arrive. I have too many other children in the house to be dealing with messing around so I do tend to be quite strict. I also always mention this when signing contracts as it can be a really difficult time for parents.

If parents arrive at different times each day I would explain that it would be helpful if they could send a text so you could get them ready. This should stop children testing the boundaries and stop the parent getting upset

Trouble
29-10-2008, 10:00 PM
i have a 1 1/2 year old who has a tantrum when she leaves (also gets everything out too before she goes if they come and pick her up)so now i put shoes coats hat on before they come and i now drop her off, they dont like it but it works better for me.

miffy
29-10-2008, 10:01 PM
I'd also have them ready to go and keep the handover as quick as possible even if that meant a call to mum later on to discuss the day.

I'm like manjay - it's my house and my rules even when parents are there and my pet hate is children who are rude to their parents!

Miffy xx

mrsb
30-10-2008, 10:28 AM
I also have a handing over of responsibility policy that I jiffled with fro mthe bromley site, It states that until the children are outside of the house I am responsible for them, the parents actually seem relieved when I tell the children to stop hitting them or stop breaking toys etc, the children learn that they still won't get away with being naughty even though the parents are there and touch wood we have no problems:panic: I also have them ready and waiting when the parents arrive though, each set of siblings has a different place for all their bags etc so they know where to pick stuff up fo when the doorbell goes:laughing: