I'm a bit upset.

[SimplyLucy]

I have a child who is contracted for 4 days a week. Every now again I'm asked to have him on the 5th day, this has happened say once a month/every 6 weeks. Never any notice, jif just they ask me on a monday it's ok to book friday for this week only. I've always had a space on a friday and the extra money was nice so I've never said no.

At the beginning of the school holidays I had a new parent wanting fridays only, great I thought and filled my space. Never even thought about mentioning it to my 4 day a week parent.

Well this week she asked me for friday and I've said no I'm full. She has realised I've taken on a new child in the friday space and gone mental.

She thinks I should have told her before taking on another child so she could have had the option of the space first! Cheek of some parents. She wouldn't have wanted to pay me for every week as a retainer anyhow.

Well as the days gone on I'm feeling a bit guilty about it, maybe I should have warned her that extra fridays were nolonger an option.:rolleyes:

[Chatterbox Childcare]

Lucy

Hindsight is a great thing.

Not sure of the ages of the two children you are discussing but ask mum if she would like to take the Friday space permanently and then contact Ofsted for an overlap. This would be classed as "Continuity of Care" and I don't believe would be a problem.

Debbie

[tulip0803]

If she knew that she needed a Friday even if it was ocaisionally she should have brought it up whent she signed contracts, but as you say she wuold not have paid a retainer to keep friday space. You should not feel guilty as you have been doing her a favour - she knew you had a space but did not want it every week and did not have it in her contract so she has no right to make you feel bad. As she knew there was a space on Friday she had her first refusal when she signed contracts. she did not want the day contracted she wanted to use it when she wanted and not pay for it at other times.

Parents are very good at making us feel guilty. You do not need to feel bad there was never any formal agreement and it was not regular as you said she just asked for a favour withou much notice and you helped when you could. Please don't feel bad.

[Mollymop]

That is cheeky of the parent, Lucy!!!:mad:
Ok, she thought you should have let her know about the space going to this other child so that she could have it first, but if not she would have happily used you for the fridays and would not have given a jot about signing up for a friday - cos that would have meant she wouldn have had to pay you for the fridays the little one is not with you. If she wanted the friday that much she should have sign up for it.
Tough!
Anyway, is there anyway you could ask for a variation on the fridays - if it is granted you could then get the parent to sign up for the friday and if she says no - I would tell her that I won't be having the little one on fridays anymore, when she wanted me.

[Annie_T]

dont feel guilty hun, it was a space that needed filling, its not up to the parent its your business, can you not get variation at all as its once a onth/6wks ?

[Blaze]

Lucy

Hindsight is a great thing.

Not sure of the ages of the two children you are discussing but ask mum if she would like to take the Friday space permanently and then contact Ofsted for an overlap. This would be classed as "Continuity of Care" and I don't believe would be a problem.

Debbie

I agree...v. cheeky of the parent, so don't feel bad!

[Mrs.L.C]

Lucy

Hindsight is a great thing.

Not sure of the ages of the two children you are discussing but ask mum if she would like to take the Friday space permanently and then contact Ofsted for an overlap. This would be classed as "Continuity of Care" and I don't believe would be a problem.

Debbie

I enquired about this a while ago and they said if I needed to it shouldnt be a problem as it was only for a few hours now and again. I just had to write in a letter stating the situation etc


A good option for you, if of course you wanted to

[Bevbeetle]

Some parents think its only there children you look after !!!!!!!!!
Do you have to tell the parents everything you do (please can i go toilet) sorry but i get do mad when the parents just use you. :angry: :angry:

I had a parent who just kept turning up when she wanted she owed me money so before i went on holiday i phoned her had to leave message told her i wasnt prepared to put up with it any longer and she needed to decide whether she needed me or not. (very brave on answer phone)

Came back from hols a letter through the door A4 saying sorry money she owed and list of dates to see if i could do. Im glad i put my foot down:clapping: :clapping:

[Julia]

I have a similar situation, a mum wants me for the Thursday and Friday each week, but nanna has her son on the Wednesday (mum only works part time), but Nanna has been very ill lately and more often than not she askes me to have him on a Wednesday.

Last week the other child I have on a Wednesday had a week off, so that ment I would have the Wednesday off completely, lovely. The part time mum rang up and asked me to have her son on the Wednesday and I said no because I wanted the day off to take my kids out, she wasnt happy she tried to put a guilt trip on me saying she would have to phone in sick and she wouldnt get paid ladeda.......

Stuff her, thats what I say, shes not contracted on a Friday so you do not have to disclose to her if you fill YOUR friday space.

Dont feel guilty, shes in the wrong

[balloon]

I'm sorry to hear you're upset Lucy.

I don't think you should feel guilty though, you really shouldn't be expected to turn mindees away just because somebody may need you once every month or so. I expect that now the mum has had a chance to calm down she's probably feeling bad too (or am I still just too naive about parents?).

The variation thing sounds like a good idea if it's allowable and it's what you want.

[SimplyLucy]

Thanks for all the replies.

Not worth me getting a variations as the new child I took on was only for the summer hols.

My 4 day a week mum will just have to lump it! It's tough luck.

When we get back into the school term and she ask for Fridays as one offs I'm going to say no, maybe that way she'll give in and contract them!

[Bushpig]

I have a similar situ. I only childmind Mon to Thurs, on a friday I have another contracted design job I go to, where I freelance. One parent who also freelances keeps asking me about a Friday, and the way she asks me, makes me feel guilty. But I would then have to find THREE other children on a Friday to make it financially worthwhile to look after her one child (for half a day!:eek: ), plus I LOVE my design job on a Friday and do not want to give it up... grrr she keeps on asking me.. and doesn't even want to commit to every friday either, just as and when... some people want it all!

Phone OFSTED and ask them as advised, I am sure they'll listen :)

[Bushpig]

Thanks for all the replies.

Not worth me getting a variations as the new child I took on was only for the summer hols.

My 4 day a week mum will just have to lump it! It's tough luck.

When we get back into the school term and she ask for Fridays as one offs I'm going to say no, maybe that way she'll give in and contract them!

Yes, do that! She needs to commit, and if not, let her know you are advertising the Friday vacancy.

[Monkey1]

I have the same situation! One of my parents doesn't want a friday.....but for the last few months they have needed every other friday. I get a bit fed up when they presume it's ok so i like to throw the 'sorry its not convenient this week in occassionally to keep them on their toes!'

[J_J]

yeah your right, ive started saying no to change of days or hours now as they just think il do anything for them. I do like to be flexiable but sometimes they just take the mick and after all its your buisness!!

jx

[miffy]

Thanks for all the replies.

Not worth me getting a variations as the new child I took on was only for the summer hols.

My 4 day a week mum will just have to lump it! It's tough luck.

When we get back into the school term and she ask for Fridays as one offs I'm going to say no, maybe that way she'll give in and contract them!

I think you're right to say no in the future unless she contracts the extra day.

Don't feel bad about this - she had her chance and didn't take it.

Miffy xx

[Nicki L]

i have one little lad mon to thurs 8.30-2.15 and fri 8.30-1.15. After christmas his mum asked if i could keep him til 2.15 on fridays aswell for 8 weeks as his dad was asked to do overtime so wouldnt be doing half days. Which i willingly did. Well the 8 weeks came and went and so i mentioned it to her and she said no he still doing it. Well anyway the over time finished 3 weeks ago and due to being on hols for 2 weeks last week was my first friday. So i said to mum, 'OH his dad will be picking him up at 1.15 today wont he?' to which she replied no - ovetime is back on, sorry i forgot to say!!!!

Not is is ok, no notice whatsoever. I was gobsmacked, felt like i had to do it.

[Hannahlg]

we have one little boy whol coems all day monday and 11am till 6.30pm on friday but mum sometimes ask us to have him other days aswell sd he had meetings etc the other days at the time we could do it wasnt a problem. And if we couldnt fit the child in as we where full etc she was ok about it as it wasnt her contacted day anywhere. and she allways asked if we could do the exta days in good time

but mum has a had another baby baby is starting on first of setepmber (little boy has beening coming will mum being off having baby) but we will be only be able to have the little boy and baby on monday and firday as we are full up on tesday wed and thruday or can only have 1 of them which will be no good for her anyways.