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LCM123
10-03-2017, 08:03 AM
I have had an incident last night where an older child has drawn and wrote something racist - it was in context and they are very clever so know what they are doing. I had 2 children here at the time who would have taken great offence had they have seen it, and when asked said child how they would feel he knew that they would be hurt and we had a chat about what is and is not appropriate and that I would be having a chat with whoever picked up. The child then said that one word was meant to be something else - however the only similarity was the beginning sound and I know that they would not confuse all of the sounds within the word. Child then asked to check if they had accidently made any other pictures like that - I found them going through everyone else bags so I told them to stop and I would check, but I found nothing. I took a photocopy to keep with my incident report to cover my own back then gave the original to dad who was furious, I told him exactly what had happened and how we had dealt with it. He said that behaviour at home wasn't great and child had been in trouble with mum that morning. Recently they had been 'too big for their boots', which I said I had noticed too over the past couple of weeks but it was nothing terrible, there was just a small group needed reigning in at times particularly when weather was bad so have had indoor play at school.

Fast forward a couple of hours and I got a phonecall from mum who wanted to know exactly what had happened as she thought the child didn't understand what they had wrote. I relayed the whole incident to her and told her how on 2 occasions the child demonstrated to me (then to dad) that they did understand what they had done. She admitted that it was their writing, but I felt like she was trying to get me to say 'well actually, they had no idea what they have wrote', which I obviously couldn't say. She then went on to try and blame another child in a round about way who was here but even though they were near each other, there was no conversation between the 2 relating to the incident and their child said it had nothing to do with anyone.

I've chewed all night over it - apart from keeping a copy and recording the incident what else can I do? Thanks

bunyip
10-03-2017, 11:04 AM
Sounds like you've done all you can for the time being.

The only other thing I can think is to decide whether it falls within Prevent duty. As an isolated incident, I'd think not. But are there any other indicators to possible links with far right extremism? That would probably mean comments made by the child of parents, beyond 'casual' racist remarks.

Is it just showing off or repeating things they've heard that they think makes them look 'big'?

Difficult though it is, the important thing is to keep records and keep it all factual, avoiding emotive responses.

chris goodyear
10-03-2017, 01:04 PM
I have had an incident last night where an older child has drawn and wrote something racist - it was in context and they are very clever so know what they are doing. I had 2 children here at the time who would have taken great offence had they have seen it, and when asked said child how they would feel he knew that they would be hurt and we had a chat about what is and is not appropriate and that I would be having a chat with whoever picked up. The child then said that one word was meant to be something else - however the only similarity was the beginning sound and I know that they would not confuse all of the sounds within the word. Child then asked to check if they had accidently made any other pictures like that - I found them going through everyone else bags so I told them to stop and I would check, but I found nothing. I took a photocopy to keep with my incident report to cover my own back then gave the original to dad who was furious, I told him exactly what had happened and how we had dealt with it. He said that behaviour at home wasn't great and child had been in trouble with mum that morning. Recently they had been 'too big for their boots', which I said I had noticed too over the past couple of weeks but it was nothing terrible, there was just a small group needed reigning in at times particularly when weather was bad so have had indoor play at school.

Fast forward a couple of hours and I got a phonecall from mum who wanted to know exactly what had happened as she thought the child didn't understand what they had wrote. I relayed the whole incident to her and told her how on 2 occasions the child demonstrated to me (then to dad) that they did understand what they had done. She admitted that it was their writing, but I felt like she was trying to get me to say 'well actually, they had no idea what they have wrote', which I obviously couldn't say. She then went on to try and blame another child in a round about way who was here but even though they were near each other, there was no conversation between the 2 relating to the incident and their child said it had nothing to do with anyone.

I've chewed all night over it - apart from keeping a copy and recording the incident what else can I do? Thanks

All I would say is stick to your guns. You were there at the time, mum wasn't. It is always hard to tell a parent that their child hasn't been the best behaved but that's kids for you. Just think if you backed down and agreed with mum that it wasn't a big deal how would the other children and parents feel?

Maza
10-03-2017, 02:41 PM
Oh how horrible for you. You handled it very professionally. All you have done is explain to mum what happened and what you saw, which you have a duty to do, you haven't made any accusations or anything.

Mouse
10-03-2017, 03:08 PM
As others have said, it sounds as if you have dealt very well with an unpleasant situation.

I think mum's reaction is quite common. She knows what you've said is the truth, but doesn't want to accept it and is trying to put the blame on someone else. Hopefully she'll have time to think about it and realise she's out of order. If she does keep mentioning it I would be firm with her and tell her that no, you weren't mistaken - it was her son and he did understand what he was doing.

I would note is an an incident, including mum's and dad's responses.

bunyip
10-03-2017, 06:43 PM
All I would say is stick to your guns. You were there at the time, mum wasn't. It is always hard to tell a parent that their child hasn't been the best behaved but that's kids for you. Just think if you backed down and agreed with mum that it wasn't a big deal how would the other children and parents feel?

Absolutely.

I have a client who teaches primary. She is forever dealing with parents whose children "would never have said" precisely what my client and her assistant both heard them say. :panic:

BallyH
10-03-2017, 08:20 PM
You dealt with this incident really well. Well done. If it happens in schools it's held on their record, quite rightly.

sarah707
10-03-2017, 08:59 PM
In addition to what you have already done I think it's important to show Ofsted (who require us to show them any incidents of racist language) how you are managing it for the future.

I'd plan some after-school activities about caring and sharing and being respectful and accepting of others.

I'd also include books which focus on multiculturalism and diversity in my book box and encourage the children to read and discuss them.

I hope that helps :)