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View Full Version : Constant crying - what to do?



fluff1975
19-09-2016, 08:17 AM
Morning. I would never usually come on here whilst working unless teh children are sleeping but I'm getting a bit desperate!

I have a new starter - 11 months old, comes 2 days a week (8am -5.30pm), this is day 5, week 3. He also had 4, weekly visits of 2 hours during August.

He arrived at 8am this morning and has cried since (its nearly 9.15). He's only ever had care from parents and has only started daytime napping out of their bed or not in a sling/on them over the past 2 weeks (at my request). Hes a lovely little boy but the 2.5 year old I also look after doesn't think so and she's getting very upset.

I'm not sure he's ready to be left but not sure how long I should keep trying. The crying is commonplace, he does it whenever I touch him or look at him. Yes, seriously, every time adn I'm struggling to make any kind of connection with him due to this :(

Any advice?

mumofone
19-09-2016, 08:28 AM
Morning. I would never usually come on here whilst working unless teh children are sleeping but I'm getting a bit desperate! I have a new starter - 11 months old, comes 2 days a week (8am -5.30pm), this is day 5, week 3. He also had 4, weekly visits of 2 hours during August. He arrived at 8am this morning and has cried since (its nearly 9.15). He's only ever had care from parents and has only started daytime napping out of their bed or not in a sling/on them over the past 2 weeks (at my request). Hes a lovely little boy but the 2.5 year old I also look after doesn't think so and she's getting very upset. I'm not sure he's ready to be left but not sure how long I should keep trying. The crying is commonplace, he does it whenever I touch him or look at him. Yes, seriously, every time adn I'm struggling to make any kind of connection with him due to this :( Any advice?

I just had a baby start recently, same age and situation as you. It took them a good 4 weeks to settle with additional visits thrown in too...can they come and see you for an hour or so on a couple of other days just so they get more and more used to you. I thought the baby I have would NEVER settle so I would keep at it a bit longer and see. Good luck xx

mumofone
19-09-2016, 08:31 AM
I just had a baby start recently, same age and situation as you. It took them a good 4 weeks to settle with additional visits thrown in too...can they come and see you for an hour or so on a couple of other days just so they get more and more used to you. I thought the baby I have would NEVER settle so I would keep at it a bit longer and see. Good luck xx

Sorry point of this was to say they HAVE settled when I never thought they would so hopefully the little boy will for you too :-) x

JCrakers
19-09-2016, 08:45 AM
Its really hard when this happens. Some babies settle straight away, others take a couple of days to feel familiar or weeks. Occasionally some babies don't settle and its up to you to decide on how long you want to stick at it.

I've only had 1 experience of a baby not settling at all in 21yrs. She literally cried at everything and I couldn't do anything to comfort or settle her. She was a sibling of an existing child so even the presence of her older sister didn't calm her! I stuck it out for 8 weeks (4 days a week, 8am-6pm) and then literally couldn't do anymore...for my sanity and the baby.

Have you tried a comfort blanket that smells of Mum, or something that she's worn? Will she take a dummy? Could you try a sling (something which I personally wouldn't try as I have a bad back and I didn't want to be carrying baby around) but for some, it can help.

How about a home visit? If you have time...to see baby in her own home? This may help.

If nothing is working then its just a matter of picking a time that you will continue with it and then possibly giving notice, especially as its making your existing mindee unhappy.

mathremuk
01-10-2016, 10:15 PM
Morning. I would never usually come on here whilst working unless teh children are sleeping but I'm getting a bit desperate!

I have a new starter - 11 months old, comes 2 days a week (8am -5.30pm), this is day 5, week 3. He also had 4, weekly visits of 2 hours during August.

He arrived at 8am this morning and has cried since (its nearly 9.15). He's only ever had care from parents and has only started daytime napping out of their bed or not in a sling/on them over the past 2 weeks (at my request). Hes a lovely little boy but the 2.5 year old I also look after doesn't think so and she's getting very upset.

I'm not sure he's ready to be left but not sure how long I should keep trying. The crying is commonplace, he does it whenever I touch him or look at him. Yes, seriously, every time adn I'm struggling to make any kind of connection with him due to this :(

Any advice?

My daughter was this child and I was one very worn out parent. She wouldn't be with anyone but me and was a very miserable baby. Even I couldn't satisfy her at times! She never laughed until she was 1!

I don't know if this will help you but lots of time outside on walks settled her a lot. She liked to be carried a lot to watch everything. She was very nosey.

It's so difficult when they are like that. Don't get me wrong she's beautiful and a right character now but I hated the early days and i'm expecting my second soon. Praying I get a good one lol. Having a really content 11 month old in my care now has really highlighted to me how difficult my girl was.

Good luck.