Braiding mindees hair!!

[lknight1976]

Hi Everyone!

I've had this child for around 3 years and she's great. Mum on the other hand, wants me to braid childs hair about once a week. I hate confrontation, like a lot, and never ever say/text what I want to say and just agree with everything. But its getting to the point where its a text about being late (not asking if its ok ) and always assuming i'll say yes because I never said no in the past. How do I change this without sounding abrupt. If I had to do all the girls hair before school i'd be a hairdresser! Is it a fair request from mum or is it out of order to even ask it of me? Thanks!!

[JCrakers]

Id just say that you don't have time. I wouldn't do it, that's the job of parent

I would possibly put it in a ponytail but the time before school is so busy

[chris goodyear]

I wouldn't do it either. If she is a schoolie like JCrackers I would do a quick tidy up but no more. I have a 3 year old who sometimes comes with hair that's not even been brushed and it's very long so I just tie it back and when school and play school runs are done I will sort it out properly so really it's the time element that determines what I do. I agree it is the parent's job but then I don't want to take a mindee out and it look like I'm not caring for her properly. If it was a one off I wouldn't say anything but if it is more of a regular occurrence then I would speak to mum and explain that I really don't have the time before school to do that and if I was asked to braid hair I would have to say no cos I can't do it!

[FloraDora]

I love dong my LO's hair- having only had sons I have found learning how to braid a lovel challenge
And love playing when they want the hairdressers role play out!
However, if you haven't time then it would be different - say you are happy to scoop into a pony tail or add a couple of slides but if she wants more, then she will have to do it.

[alex__17]

I have to say I have a little boy and would love to do a little girl to do hairstyles on so would have no problem, I always smile when a mummy of a little one I have goes away on business and begs me to redo dads hair efforts! Although daddy is getting so good I don't always need to step in!
However if I was in a rush a ponytail would have to do, depends on time, I wouldn't have a problem but would do whatever I have time to do

[tulip0803]

I don't do hair before school - except when a Mum went away to work and left a Dad in charge - he tried but he is more used to dealing with sheep than small girls hair. :laughing:

[Maza]

These posts about dads efforts made me chuckle! I remember once when DH had to take DD to school and I found him practising how to do her hair the night before! I hate doing hair with a passion, I find it such a chore.

I think it's like anything else, you don't mind doing it to help out now and again, but when you feel like it is being taken for granted that you will always do it then it starts to grate. What's the worst that will happen if you politely say you don't really have the time? Easier said than done, I know. x

[Mouse]

I only look after pre-schoolers and they often ask me to do their hair. It's really nice when it's a relaxed part of the day, but I wouldn't do it if I was in a rush to get out to school in the morning.

If it's something you don't want to do, don't have time to do or simply think it's something mum would be doing herself, there's really no harm in saying no. You don't have to be abrupt or confrontational about it. If mum asks you to braid her child's hair, say 'ok, I will if I have the time' and leave it at that. Then at the end of the day just say you didn't get chance to do it. If you say it all in a happy, upbeat way mum probably won't think anything about it. If you start apologising and saying sorry it automatically makes the other person think you're in the wrong so they're more likely to take it badly. A lot of it's not about what you say but about the way you say it.

[bunyip]

Id just say that you don't have time. I wouldn't do it, that's the job of parent

I would possibly put it in a ponytail but the time before school is so busy

I would either do this, or else braid it so incredibly badly that nobody ever asked again. :rolleyes:

I've only really had two hair problems. I get regular way-out-of-proportion complaints about lost hair bobbles. The other was a lo whose hair was always knotted. Mum seemingly couldn't face the fight to brush it out which meant a daily struggle with the lo yelling at me, even though I was as gentle as possible. I asked mum if she wouldn't rather cut it short and avoid all the discomfort but both mum and daughter wanted it long so, however much she didn't like the brushing, it had to be done. :(

[Maza]

I would either do this, or else braid it so incredibly badly that nobody ever asked again. :rolleyes:

I've only really had two hair problems. I get regular way-out-of-proportion complaints about lost hair bobbles. The other was a lo whose hair was always knotted. Mum seemingly couldn't face the fight to brush it out which meant a daily struggle with the lo yelling at me, even though I was as gentle as possible. I asked mum if she wouldn't rather cut it short and avoid all the discomfort but both mum and daughter wanted it long so, however much she didn't like the brushing, it had to be done. :(

Oh I love that idea!

I know what you mean about a LO who always has matted hair. That's my DD. Most days I cannot face the struggle, but it has to be done and I wouldn't expect anyone else to do it for me. I think that's why I hate doing hair. Mine is the same, my mum used to call me Worzel Gummage (sp?) every morning when she went through the battle. I find that when DD sleeps in a plat or two her hair is so much easier to brush the next day. She slept with it down last night (school holidays and so she likes her hair down as she has to wear it up for school) and today it looks like a bird's nest. :panic: Maybe you could suggest that LO keeps her braids in at bedtime.

Hope my comment about dads doing hair didn't come across as offensive. I'm sure Nicky Clarke/Vidal Sassoon would send their daughters off too school with first class braids that they had done with their eyes shut!

[loocyloo]

My dd used to hate having her hair brushed.

We got a picture of Rupenzel with her long hair hanging out of a window, and then dd coloured it in. Then i added some star stickers up the hair and laminated it. Each time dd had her hair brushed with no fussing, she got to move up a star. When at the top she got a hair related prize (mainly bobbles or clips!) It took a few runs up the hair, but soon the fussing stopped.

We also used a tangle teezer and a conditioning spray.
Good luck!

I only do hair if i have time for mindees! Dd however, will spend hours doing it!

[bunyip]

Hope my comment about dads doing hair didn't come across as offensive. I'm sure Nicky Clarke/Vidal Sassoon would send their daughters off too school with first class braids that they had done with their eyes shut!

No worries. I'm exceptionally difficult to offend: you have to try much harder than that. ;)

Anyway, why do you think most men go for low-maintenance short hair and an occasional trip to the barber's?

[blue bear]

I've done hair before when parents struggled and teeth and clothes...... But if you don't want to do it tell her no, I find the occasional use of no works wonders at reminding people not to take you for granted.

[kellib]

I've done it, when I have the time to do it.

I used to have one mindee who wouldn't let mum brush their hair but would let me, we used to play hairdressers a lot!