Father's day

[gef918]

I have a mindees who has limited contact with her dad, just a few hours a month. With fathers day coming up in have the problem of who she should make a fathers gift for. Her stepfather is much more involved in her life and it's his first fathers day with her.

I have asked mum who she wants the gift to be for, but I'm wordering if I should be treating this child differently.

[kellib]

Can't she just make the gift and leave it up to mum who gets it?

[natlou82]

Could you make two for this child?

[Maza]

I don't do anything with the mindees for Father's Day or Mother's Day. I leave it to the families to organise/celebrate amongst themselves.

[Dragonfly]

I do make something for fathers and Mother's Day but if it gets done is has if not it's no big deal. I would leave it to the childs mother to decide.

[mama2three]

If the child is old enough they should decide themselves , or choose to make 2.
A close cm friend has a child with 2 mummies - the little girl will still join in fathers day crafts if she chooses to , and give them to whoever she likes - quite possibly grandad.

[Maza]

My mum's mum died when my mum was a little girl and she still talks now about absolutely dreading her classmates all having to make something for their mums and she remembers feeling really 'embarrassed' by the fact that she was different - nobody tried to make her feel different, of course.

My dad died when my sister was still at primary school and my sister was told to make the card for her granddad. When she told the teacher that she didn't have a granddad either, she impatiently said, "Oh, well...make it for one of your brothers then." She didn't give it to any of our brothers but made the craft anyway because she had no choice. A family friend has just had a similar experience.

I know my examples are a bit extreme, but I'm happier leaving Mother's/Father's Day to the families themselves.

[loocyloo]

I don't make specific Mothers or Fathers Day craft/gift etc ... we may make a card or something but it is up to the children/parent what is done with it, or who it is given to.

The only exception I have had, was a LO with just mum at home and very little/no family support and no partner (and LO never saw dad) so I used to make sure something was done for mothers day.

[gef918]

Thanks everyone. Mum decided grandad should get the gift.

I think in the future I will ask all parents who they want the card or gift to be for, then I won't feel that I'm treating children differently.