New mindee doubts

[Georgiepoo]

Hi, I'm a new childminder and currently only have a 1 year old little girl 2 days a week (9-3:30) who is a dream baby!
I was looking to fill my other days and possibly take on a school pick up. I had an enquiry for school pick up 3-5 with a 4 year old boy which was perfect...so invited them up for a visit to meet them. At the visit mum said that school have decided he isn't settling and have reduced his hours and could I have him during the hours he isn't at school-I agreed as this would fill my free days for a few months. The little boy was fine at his visit and played well with my 2 year old son-however was quite lively and excitable which I put down to new toys, someone to play with etc.
Since the visit I have found out he was a 'handful' at his nursery and have researched reasons why children are put in reduced hours at primary school and I am starting to think I may have taken on a BIG challenge!!
Mum has a meeting Tuesday with the school before I pick him up so I'm anxious to hear what they say, I am goin to suggest mum comes in for a coffee when she collects him to discuss and fill me in on what the school have said at the meeting-I just hope she is honest with me!!!

Views/advise please

Thanks
Nervous first time childminder.

[Kiddleywinks]

Best advice I can give without knowing all the facts

Do you have a 'settling in period' in your contract?
This is the period during which a new contract can terminate or be terminated if it's not working out. Normally during the first few (4) weeks.
If you feel you need to, you can always say to mum that as this change wasn't something either of you were expecting, you may have to extend it depending on what happens.
This in effect gives you a 'get out now' clause without having to give 4 weeks notice.
You may or may not be equipped to deal with adverse behaviour, but if it impacts on the younger children negatively, you have to be able to take immediate action.

On the flip side, the child might be much better on a one-to-one basis, which is something you may be able to support child, parent and possibly school with, so I wouldn't write it off just yet.
You will need to stress to mum that she MUST be honest with you for things to work. If she tries to hide something important for fear that you will run a mile, this could have that very effect but because she's not been honest.
I'd also get permission to talk to the school so you can be kept/keep them in the loop too. If that is refused, then I wouldn't be taking the child on purely because you all need to work together.

Good luck, and don't make a decision straight away. Sleep on it first, and have a good think about what you can and can't do :thumbsup:

[shortstuff]

Kiddleywinks has some great ideas. Another one for you. Could you ask to join her at the meeting at school? You will then be included and Mum cant hide anything from you?

[ziggy]

i think a 4 week settling in period is ideal in this situation, I do it with all my mindees

[Georgiepoo]

Thank you for your responses.

I have 'get out' clauses in my behaviour policy and zero tolerance policy also, so am covered should this child be too much and effect my child or my other mindee.

I am gonna give it all I have, coz he seems like a sweet kid and I am a glutton for punishment if I think I can make a difference to someone.

[yummyripples]

know it sounds awful but I would think very carefully about taking on this child.
Obviously it all depends on your routines etc but in my case I find 4 year olds (especially boisterous ones) are too old for the places I take them to such as toddler groups and the library. Parks and soft play are a breeze though.
Get out clauses in your policies are great but you have to remember that if you terminate a contract over whatever reason it does look bad on you. People think that you can't manage and it could affect future business.
I suppose I am looking on the negative side because I terminated a contract with an 11 month old child because for 5 months all he did was cry. It was having a detrimental effect on myself, my family and all my other mindees. So much so I was ready to pack it in.
The poor wee mite had constant ear infections and was constantly in pain ( 6 lots of antibiotics in 5 months). Mum kept sending him in unwell and it was just a nightmare. He was constantly picked up at home and was obviously upset when I couldn't do the same here.
When I spoke to her about it she said it was me who couldn't cope with babies (I minded her older child for 3 years from 6 months old with no problems) and I had lost interest in my job.
She told my other parents this (luckily they could see my side) and also her new childminder who spread the news that I was looking for a new job even though I wasn't.
Anyway thankfully it only lost me one prospective baby and since then I have had 3 new ones who have been great.
Sorry to ramble on - just be careful not to make life difficult for yourself

[FloraDora]

Difficult issue.
In my experience it is very rare for schools to reduce hours unless the child's issues are severe and only after team around the child meetings to do what is best for child. I can't see how not having him at school, but he has to go to another setting would be best for the child, two different expectations and routines no matter how much you work together.

It is probable that the child and staff can't cope so want to build up slowly, perhaps when school can afford/ provide another member of staff to support this child and don't realise the parent won't be looking after him in the time he is not with them.

I would wait until this meeting, my school experience also would want to see the minutes as I often found parents were in denial and didn't outline true behaviours at home etc.... But not sure where we stand on information sharing if parents don't want us to see it. Grey line as childminders should be as important as any private nursery or school on information sharing.

As for lack of equality: if you complete an informed risk assessment and decide the impact of the child on your setting and the setting's impact on the child is not a viable option then you have been open and honest. Not every setting is suitable for a child's specific needs and until you know the precise needs then you can't risk assess. It seems to me that it would not be good for this child to change from his present attendance, to part time attendance that collapses within or at the end of 4 weeks For him then to attend somewhere else, he needs stability and continuity not constant disruption and change to his life.
If you can, take time to get to know situation before you offer your services.
Parent could book time off work until next meeting as it is a crisis situation that needs a strategic plan to resolve.

[Georgiepoo]

Thank you for your comments.
I have had this mindee for a week week now and so far it's not been too bad. Have had to remind him about running about indoors, being overly loud and to calm down, but once told he usually follows direction.

The above being an exception today! Today I earned my money lol. He was 'full on' he didn't listen to direction, was overly lively and deliberately wound my 2 year old tired son up when having been asked to leave him alone!!!

Mum has the meeting tomo with the school as it was postponed before, have invited her Ito come in fire a coffee upon collection to discuss what the school have said and the actions going forward from them.