Help with a child who snatches

[4365]

I have a child (2 years and 2 months) who has always found it difficult to accept that another child has a toy. He constantly scans for children choosing/picking up a toy and runs over to them and tries to grab the toy (it doesn't matter what it is) and if they don't immediately let go he pulls hair/bites/hits until they give in. I have to follow him closely all day long and intervene quickly so other children don't get hurt. I give the toy back to the first child and remove the snatching child for time out. His ear shattering rage then lasts for 20 mins or so but immediately I "release him" after re-explaining and reminding of rules he snatches again. It is not a particular rivalry and his parents are very supportive, nothing will distract him, I can see his eyes lock onto a child with toy and that is it.

I am exhausted with it and feel very nervous whenever we are out. Otherwise he eats, sleeps and responds well to individual activities.

Any ideas welcome please.

[tess1981]

I have no ideas but 2 X 2yo that do this daily and I'm exhausted so waiting to see who replies but in the meantime hugs....

[Koala]

Would it be an idea to intervene before any incident happens - depending on lo understanding.
As using, the usual (which I think you are doing right), corrective instruction, time out/consequences are not working, could you set standards/rules before the child needs to be corrected, (please don't think that I think you do not have standards/rules but obviously this lo thinks they are there to be broken) i.e. constantly telling him/her not to take items of other children even if they are not doing it at that moment, ask lo to give items to other children, say it to all the children but making sure this lo gets the full understanding direct it at them more, this may also help and support the other children's feeling about being constantly victimized. You will be fed up of hearing yourself say it but after a few days lo might just get the gist!?

This situation is obviously getting to you and I must admit it would get to me too and it is probably having an affect on the other children so good luck in getting it sorted and well done for addressing it with the parents too. :thumbsup:

[alex__17]

Watching this with interest, my own 2 year old is going through similar, he was bad a while ago, seemed to 'get' sharing, now has relapsed, I think due to lack of speech and frustration, but its so wearing! Will be after any tips and will try the constant reinforcement, distraction kind of works but less so now

[Simona]

After so long in childcare I have to say I have never questioned snatching...it is part of a child social development...most children go through that phase for obvious reasons.... and if handled well it will resolve itself with the right intervention, boundary and behaviour management
The child works on the basis 'I want I snatch' because he/she has not as yet learnt basic personal and social manner in their development


Whether at home, nursery, preschool or playgroup snatching incidents happen all the time...no need to be mortified or feeling helpless as there is plenty you can do

may I also suggest we look at our sharing/taking turn policy...the 2 are totally different and sharing is far removed from turn taking

See if this helps

Social development for your toddler - Get advice at Huggies.com.au (http://www.huggies.com.au/toddler/development/social/)

[4365]

Thank you for all your replies. I know he will grow out of it as he understands more but I have now looked after more than 40 toddlers and I have never had to deal with the violence that goes with the snatching like this before and for such a long period. The snatching is the trigger for the aggression so I am trying to deal with that first. I do intervene and try to explain before we go out/ get toys out etc what is expected (not acceptable.) I will keep going and I do appreciate those of you who have similar problems saying so as it is isolating sometimes when parents look at you as if it is your fault and you have brought some kind of monster with you!