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muffins
07-04-2014, 05:12 PM
I'm quite angry at a parent who has purposefully taken mindee to mix with another child who has chicken pox, mindee has now come out with chicken pox:panic:. In the process between mindee being exposed and coming out with it they have mixed with 3 other mindees, 2 of my own children and I also have another of my own children who didn't have direct contact, all but 1 hasn't yet had it! We also visited a toddler group!

I just feel parent has knowingly put all these children not to mention her own at risk:(

I'm not sure if I am being over the top about this because of another incident that happened a few wks ago when said mindee injured my own child resulting in non emergency medical treatment being given. This is still a little raw in my mind so my judgement is a little clouded.

karen2010
07-04-2014, 05:18 PM
Think you are being a little OTT !
Lots of Parents purposely mix their children in with others with chicken pox, so they get it early and get it over with!
It is her child so her decision.
Up to you but I wouldnt give notice for it xx

shortstuff
07-04-2014, 05:27 PM
I would have preferred ds to get cp younger to be fair.

Maybe it is too raw for you. Hugs.

rickysmiths
07-04-2014, 05:53 PM
No it strict business terms, she has knowingly brought a child that could be contagious into your setting. In my Pacey Contracts that is instant termination with payment in lieu of the notice period.

I know you could pick up CP from anywhere but this woman deliberately sort it out for the purpose of her child getting it and still continued to use you and the child would have been most contagious.

I would give immediate notice because she has abused your setting and your trust, I would be furious what a horrible and thoughtless woman. If she wants to do this fine but keep her child away from your setting during the incubation period. One of your mums could be pregnant, one of the other mindees may have issues that could mean getting CP could be difficult.

Koala
07-04-2014, 06:08 PM
No, I wouldn't give notice. I would exclude according to my sickness policy for a min 5 days from when spots appear and not return until crusted over.

I might be a bit miffed that she had put others including my own children at risk without any consideration whatsoever. It is ok, imo, for parents to make the decision for their own children being contaminated with the pox but when they are cared for by others maybe they should consider the wider implications and effects it could have on others - so I can understand your not happy. And yes, I think I might be rather upset and insulted too.

In the cold light of day though and looking at the situation without judgement and putting aside your feelings - is it really an issue that chicken pox has come to your setting in this manner - it does often work it's way around anyway without intentional actions. And I do agree it is best to get chicken pox when youngish.

This parent has done nothing wrong apart from being selfish (which is par for the course with a lot of people nowadays) as to your feelings and the effects the chicken pox may have on others, but arguably this is an acceptable and expected illness for most people to get and hopefully will just take it's course and move on.

Good luck with your little ones and I hope if they do get it, it's quick and over quickly and you don't have to close for too long because then what would chicken pox mum do for childcare then :D

bunyip
07-04-2014, 06:52 PM
I can see both sides of this.

Rickysmiths is certainly right that the mum has breached the contracted terms by bringing a child who is (if not 100% known to be infectious) then certainly intended to be infectious, into your setting. Whilst CP isn't of itself dangerous, it's not good to be in contact with it for pregnant women or people with some blood disorders.

OTOH, I'm old enough to remember my mum trying to make sure I got CP as early as possible. In fact, in the pre-MMR days of my childhood, these were referred to as "childhood infections" and it was seen as good practice to get them out of the way before they turned into serious development-threatening conditions by catching them 'late'. I'm also mindful of the fact that we can take all the precautions we like and children will still catch it, either from a total stranger in a bus queue, or from our settings cos it is passed on before the carrier exhibits any symptoms .

At best, we're at a point where there is no concensus as to whether children should be getting or avoiding CP. More likely, the way health trends go, we're at one extreme of the pendulum's motion before it all swings right back the other way.

In summary, you probably have the right to give notice, but that doesn't always make it the best thing to do. Personally, I'd go for a firm and unequivocal clarification of the policy and it might be best to remember that "...the quality of mercy is not strained..." and all that.

BUT I'm not sure that any of what I've just written is the tiniest bit relevant to your situation. My gut feeling is that what really rankles is the injury sustained by your own child (and I sincerely hope s/he is OK now :group hug: ) and that may be the real issue that is yet to be addressed. Hope it all works out for you.

smurfette
07-04-2014, 06:54 PM
I think I would be annoyed too, as rs said fine if they want to expose their kids to it but they should have ran it past you first ,, problem with exposing kids to it is that they might be any time up to 21 days Til they get it so they are contagious before that., fine if parents are home but if they are at work and Los are with you it shouldn't be done!! As pp said you could have a pregnant mum or a Lo whose immune would be compromised .. I have a lo whose sister has cystic fibrosis and obviously cos of confidentiality not all parents know it. Have u told mum you aren't happy with what she has done?

karen2010
07-04-2014, 07:04 PM
Most Parents would not think of the effect this may have on the Childminders business by doing this. I agree she should have ran it past you first but maybe you are more upset by the first incident and this has exacerbated it for you.
I would certainly exclude mindee from the setting until the spots have scabbed over, this will also give you chance to reflect on it all.
This is no easy job is it ??!!
xxxxxxxxxxxx

tigwig
07-04-2014, 08:07 PM
Oh dear I can understand why you are upset and annoyed. She has been out of order I agree. If you are looking for a reason to give notice this could be it however if it were me I would write a strongly worded letter to her saying how she has put so many children and other families at risk intentionally. Point it out professionally (and politely of course!) the possible repercussions of her actions. Then I would take great delight in excluding her child for as long as possible, at least 5 days, more if the spots arent all dried up.

blue bear
07-04-2014, 08:14 PM
Let's hope her little one and any others have it mild,silly lady. Most people think chickenpox is fairly harmless, it can be so very dangerous for some.:( .

muffins
07-04-2014, 09:29 PM
Thanks for your replies everyone.

Thankfully child is tto and I have the week after Easter off so they won't be here anyway! Time to think! Also time so see if anyone else catches it, at which point I would be none to impressed! Thankfully no pregnant mums (that I know of), v young babies or anyone with suppressed immunity.

Yes the previous incident wasn't nice but nothing too major it was just unfortunate my dd had to have anti b's as a precaution, what happened certainly wasn't acceptable but mindee wasn't to understand the implications of their actions. What upset me most was that it was 2wks for any kind of apology, if it had of been my child I would have been horrified! I have been shadowing child since to avoid any repeats.

alwaysright
07-04-2014, 09:30 PM
i would be furious if she did that as she puts everyone as risk including you as you could catch shingles! i also really disagree that chicken pox is not dangerous, people seem to think its a harmless childhood illness but it isnt! a little girl of 7 recently died from chicken pox and my own daughter had it just over 12 months ago and ended up very ill and having to see a cardiologist, all brought on by the virus!
i think only you can decide if you give notice as its fine for me to say i would but i really dont know until i was i your situation. i have a situation at the moment where one of mine had chicken pox last week so obviously was in contact with everyone before we knew but the child has a sibling also with me, i allowed the sibling to carry on coming as they showed no sign of the illness and still hasnt. i wasnt happy about it but i couldnt exclude as he didnt have it!

jackie 7
08-04-2014, 07:23 AM
Having had c p 3 times and the last when I was in my 30's I know how sick I felt. It is a virus and has different effects on everyone. I would be very cross with mum. I would let her know how you feel.

hectors house
08-04-2014, 08:23 AM
i would be furious if she did that as she puts everyone as risk including you as you could catch shingles! i also really disagree that chicken pox is not dangerous, people seem to think its a harmless childhood illness but it isnt! a little girl of 7 recently died from chicken pox and my own daughter had it just over 12 months ago and ended up very ill and having to see a cardiologist, all brought on by the virus!
i think only you can decide if you give notice as its fine for me to say i would but i really dont know until i was i your situation. i have a situation at the moment where one of mine had chicken pox last week so obviously was in contact with everyone before we knew but the child has a sibling also with me, i allowed the sibling to carry on coming as they showed no sign of the illness and still hasnt. i wasnt happy about it but i couldnt exclude as he didnt have it!

Just to correct you there - you can't catch Shingles, it's a virus that remains dormant in anybody who has previously had chicken pox, and you can develop Shingles at any time, often people with low immune systems (after cancer treatments or long term illness) or people suffering from stress related illnesses can develop it. However a person with Shingles can infect others with Chicken Pox.

In my opinion it is far better to get chicken pox when you are young, when me and my brother had it as children we gave it to my dad - he was VERY ill, in and out of consciousness for several days and the doctors think this triggered his fibromyialgia that he now suffers with.

A few weeks ago a mindee came and the mum said that she had just heard that after a birthday party that her child attended at the weekend, several children had now developed chicken pox, she knowingly sent that child and I gladly accepted that child knowing that she had been exposed to the virus and yes, child did go down with it last week. Waiting to see who will be next - but won't be my problem as I'm off on holiday on Thursday!

Koala
08-04-2014, 08:39 AM
I agree with h h about the transmission of shingles :thumbsup:

Also having had a recent conversation with our gp - chicken pox itself only emerges once in any individual (the virus then stays dorment in the body but can re trigger as shingles later on for which I now believe there is an immunization for older/vulnerable people) - often other disease such as hand foot and mouth can be miss diagnosed as chicken pox.

I know people will reply with "i've had it twice" but could it possibly have been something else. Having had several children over the past month develope chicken pox, they have been so different in their individual circumstances - one could easily have just had a bit of nappy rash - it was so minimal but one OMG COVERED from head to toe with nasty big blistery spots.

Hope it all works out well for you though. :thumbsup:

hectors house
08-04-2014, 08:59 AM
I agree with h h about the transmission of shingles :thumbsup:

Also having had a recent conversation with our gp - chicken pox itself only emerges once in any individual (the virus then stays dorment in the body but can re trigger as shingles later on for which I now believe there is an immunization for older/vulnerable people) - often other disease such as hand foot and mouth can be miss diagnosed as chicken pox.

I know people will reply with "i've had it twice" but could it possibly have been something else. Having had several children over the past month develope chicken pox, they have been so different in their individual circumstances - one could easily have just had a bit of nappy rash - it was so minimal but one OMG COVERED from head to toe with nasty big blistery spots.

Hope it all works out well for you though. :thumbsup:

The severity of it depends on the amount of exposure - often a child will just sit next to the wrong person at snack time at toddlers and get a very mild dose - my 3 year old mindee last week only had about 30 spots and most of them were in her hair and on face, but the other children that she has played with constantly for the time she was contagious (but spots hadn't appeared) may get it worse as they have been more exposed to it. This is why in America I believe they immunize siblings.

yummyripples
08-04-2014, 07:28 PM
I would be annoyed and I would make my reasons known to the parents.
I had a parent who when the child was poorly would blame it on everyone else. When her child brought chicken pox into my house she refused to believe my diagnosis. Her child passed it on to the other children in my setting. She thought it was funny because her son had 20 spots (ish) and they had all crusted over within 5 days. The others had in excess of 400 spots and were off for over a week. If it would have been the other way round I never would have heard the end of it

Mummits
14-04-2014, 08:47 AM
I heard a couple of weeks ago that there was now a vaccine being offered locally for chickenpox. I'm not sure if it is only privately as I didn't take much notice as my children have already had it. I might think about it though if they hadn't, as apart from being a nasty thing to have, it could cost a lot to potentially have to close for a week or more.