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View Full Version : Unfair pressure from teacher?



Aimee McMillan
07-03-2014, 11:08 PM
My daughter(6) cannot zip her own coat yet, she has trouble connecting the zip but can pull it up if its connected by someone.

Her School teacher is putting pressure on her though by saying that by the end of next week, she has to be able to zip it herself so my daughter is getting frustrated when I'm teaching her due to the pressure of having to be able to do it by end of next week.

So, I am now having to worry about my own daughter struggling to zip her coat as well as having to deal with the 8yr old that I mind, refusing to zip up her coat.

*daisychain*
08-03-2014, 07:57 AM
Let's hope the weather is nice and no zips / coats are needed! Sure you are fed up with zips at the moment ! I would have to tell the teacher that she will do it in her own time when she is ready and that you are supporting her at home.

Koala
08-03-2014, 08:18 AM
Buy a cheap coat from supermarket with velcro or buttons. Get the teacher to try and zip that one up! :D poor kid :D I agree this is too much pressure but maybe the teacher is just trying to help your daughter develop (incorrectly by putting time limits on IMO it's not exactly A levels YET! :D) I would support your daughter by removing the issue and mastering it at your own pace :thumbsup: Give her a big hug and treat her to a new coat if you can.

Maza
08-03-2014, 08:20 AM
You'll be dreaming of zips soon! Yes, I think that's unfair. Have a word with the teacher. He/she might not realise the impact of his/her words. Some coats just have trickier zips than others. As we speak I am wearing a cardigan which I have to pull over my head because I cannot undo the silly zip on it. I'm sure here are plenty of kids who can't do their zip at that age. x

Glitter
08-03-2014, 08:25 AM
You need to talk to her teacher and explain why your daughter can not zip up her coat. I know the teacher will be frustrated as zipping up a coat seems like a simple thing to do, but the extra pressure will not help your daughter.

I agree with Koala about buying a coat which does not have a zip (or sewing velcro strips in her coat).

I understand what you are going through- my daughter could not put on her own socks until she was 8 and still can not use a knife and fork at the age of 12, and this often gets her in to trouble.

bunyip
08-03-2014, 10:08 AM
My daughter(6) cannot zip her own coat yet, she has trouble connecting the zip but can pull it up if its connected by someone.

Her School teacher is putting pressure on her though by saying that by the end of next week, she has to be able to zip it herself so my daughter is getting frustrated when I'm teaching her due to the pressure of having to be able to do it by end of next week.

So, I am now having to worry about my own daughter struggling to zip her coat as well as having to deal with the 8yr old that I mind, refusing to zip up her coat.

OK, so: teacher says DD has to be able to zip her own coat by next Friday............

.....or......

......what, exactly? :huh:

Is the school planning to expel her or actually, er.....well......er, support and teach her, maybe? :huh:

IIWY I'd ask. School-issued ultimatums are frequently an exercise in bluff-calling. :p

scottishlass
08-03-2014, 10:11 AM
I would also put her in a different coat without a zip for next week! My daughter can sometimes get her zip done other time not and she is 7 - seems to get it first time or gets annoyed and loses the rag at it! Xx

Ripeberry
08-03-2014, 12:35 PM
Give her a big jumper type fleece. Sorted! :thumbsup:

blue bear
08-03-2014, 12:40 PM
Agree with the above but looking at it from another angle which bit does your daughter find difficult, have you tried to break it down so this week we will try getting the metal bit into the two bits and I will zip it, next ...
Or may be just start with getting her to hold it in her hands the correct way no putting it together just getting the hold right, baby staps like you do with any learning. Most children I've ever worked with have been able to master coat zipping by six, most but not all. My 21 year old still can't and never will.

Allie
08-03-2014, 01:38 PM
My 8 year old granddaughter has trouble with all fine muscle control and stuggles with this, so coats with velcro as well keep her independent

Aimee McMillan
08-03-2014, 02:01 PM
Agree with the above but looking at it from another angle which bit does your daughter find difficult, have you tried to break it down so this week we will try getting the metal bit into the two bits and I will zip it, next ...
Or may be just start with getting her to hold it in her hands the correct way no putting it together just getting the hold right, baby staps like you do with any learning. Most children I've ever worked with have been able to master coat zipping by six, most but not all. My 21 year old still can't and never will.

Its connecting zip she has trouble with, she can pull it up if its connected for her.

I will just keep working at it.

Aimee McMillan
08-03-2014, 02:45 PM
Let's hope the weather is nice and no zips / coats are needed! Sure you are fed up with zips at the moment ! I would have to tell the teacher that she will do it in her own time when she is ready and that you are supporting her at home.


Weather up here is anything but "nice", yesterday was really heavy rain with strong winds, weather was so bad that teacher zipped DD coat all the way to the top and today it is just strong winds but luckily she is indoors today.

Simona
08-03-2014, 04:04 PM
OK, so: teacher says DD has to be able to zip her own coat by next Friday............

.....or......

......what, exactly? :huh:

Is the school planning to expel her or actually, er.....well......er, support and teach her, maybe? :huh:

IIWY I'd ask. School-issued ultimatums are frequently an exercise in bluff-calling. :p

Imagine what teachers will do when presented with 30 2 year olds in nappies?
I would like to know what kind of ultimatum will they be issuing on such young children?...let's guess...'either you learn to use the loo or I will return you to a CM when you will do that in your time' :angry:

Seriously...the child will learn to zip up her coat as and when ready ....would I buy a new one with Velcro? certainly not and ask the teacher to be a little bit more patient

FussyElmo
08-03-2014, 04:18 PM
To the op were you there when the teacher made the comment?

I was just wondering whether or not this is a misinterpretation of what was being said.

Could the teacher have said with a little bit of practise you could learn to do your zip by next week - its only this bit you are having trouble with. Not you will learn to fasten your zip by next week. Children have a tendency of only hearing certain parts of sentences.

Like my when 6yo came old and told he his teacher was trying to drown him. Loosely translated he had been asked to go in a deeper part of the swimming pool :laughing::laughing::laughing:

AliceK
08-03-2014, 05:52 PM
I would definitely be speaking to the teacher if only to find out exactly what was said, but in all honestly whatever it was it has obviously stressed your DD and made her worry about it. If it were me I would if I could send her in a coat she could do up herself if only to avoid the stress she may be feeling when she has to have her coat on at playtimes / lunchtimes and at home I would practice with her with the zip.
I have a 4yr old mindee who starts school in Sept and she has only just learnt to do her zip up with my constant helping because I know the school wont bother and they'll leave her with it open. On the other hand I have a 2 yr old who can already zip her own coat up. They all learn in their own time.
My own DD aged 6 got very stressed with having to put her tights on after her PE lessons, she can do it but it takes her ages and they don't have ages when they are at school. I didn't realise how much she was stressed by it until she one day told the teacher she couldn't do PE because her leg was hurting and the teacher called me. I think if I can alleviate some of the stress then I will, so now on PE days I send her in trousers with tights underneath (as it has been cold) but I put her a pair of long socks in her bag so after PE she can just put her socks on instead of her tights. Anything to make life a bit easier for her so she doesn't have to stress so much.
I'm sure your DD will learn to do her zip in time but putting pressure on her isn't going to help.

xxxx

Aimee McMillan
08-03-2014, 07:18 PM
To the op were you there when the teacher made the comment?

I was just wondering whether or not this is a misinterpretation of what was being said.

Could the teacher have said with a little bit of practise you could learn to do your zip by next week - its only this bit you are having trouble with. Not you will learn to fasten your zip by next week. Children have a tendency of only hearing certain parts of sentences.

Like my when 6yo came old and told he his teacher was trying to drown him. Loosely translated he had been asked to go in a deeper part of the swimming pool :laughing::laughing::laughing:

No, i was waiting outside for her so it could be that it was a misinterperation.

As I said though, I will keep teaching her, probably won't be tonight though as I will find it hard to concentrate after that typical loss from jaws of victory from Scotland Rugby team :'(.

bunyip
08-03-2014, 07:44 PM
No, i was waiting outside for her so it could be that it was a misinterperation.

As I said though, I will keep teaching her, probably won't be tonight though as I will find it hard to concentrate after that typical loss from jaws of victory from Scotland Rugby team :'(.

Oops they did it again: - 'Oh, Shower of Scotland..............' :p

Aimee McMillan
08-03-2014, 08:20 PM
To anyone saying get a coat with velcro, the coat has velcro but as its the coat issued by the School, she has to wear it plus the teachers insist on it being zipped up whilst at School so at start of day when she goes into School and during break/lunch it has to be zipped up and on way out of School its either teacher or me that zip it up, teacher does it more often than not though, I let her leave it unzipped if teacher hasn't done it if its good but if its poor weather and teacher hasn't zipped it, I start it off and let her pull it up.

Simona
08-03-2014, 09:27 PM
No, i was waiting outside for her so it could be that it was a misinterperation.

As I said though, I will keep teaching her, probably won't be tonight though as I will find it hard to concentrate after that typical loss from jaws of victory from Scotland Rugby team :'(.

Isn't that what happened in the Scotland-Italy game 2 weeks ago when Scotland snatched victory at the very last minute for just 1 point?

No matter...it was a very good game!...on we soldier with Oh flower of Scotland!! and the Inno di Mameli...otherwise known as Fratelli d'Italia!!!

Aimee McMillan
09-03-2014, 10:06 PM
Worked on this for a while today but she still isn't getting it which is frustrating poor bairn, just told her to keep at it.

I showed her that once its connected she has to keep a hold of zip and pull the zip, keeping a hold of the bottom tightly so that it zips up properly.

She gets zip into its part but doesn't hold bottom tightly enough meaning it is not zipping properly, hope this makes sense, its best way i could describe her problem.

Aimee McMillan
10-03-2014, 12:31 AM
When my DD is trying to zip her coat, the zipper is splitting, like in the final image of this link.

blackcountrywiththekids.com/tag/zipper-splitting/.

Maza
10-03-2014, 11:50 AM
I get what you mean, you described it perfectly. I should imagine it is a common problem. Have you spoken to her teacher yet? Poor thing, it's not worth her stressing over is it?

AdeleMarie88
10-03-2014, 12:23 PM
What exactly are they going to do if she can't master it by then?

The teacher needs to be supporting her in this, rather than just setting her challenges. I would remove the pressure from your child, not pay any attention to zips, try using. Different coat, or just say to your daughter, it's ok if you can't do it yet, I will always help you. Make sure you tell the etcher your plans of how to help your DD too x

Aimee McMillan
10-03-2014, 12:58 PM
I get what you mean, you described it perfectly. I should imagine it is a common problem. Have you spoken to her teacher yet? Poor thing, it's not worth her stressing over is it?

Yes, I spoke to her teacher and she apologised for her words, she didn't realise that it stressed my dd so much.

She said that she will also teach her with bit she's having trouble with and told my dd that she will help her whenever its needed.

Aimee McMillan
10-03-2014, 09:34 PM
Worked with her for a while with the connecting the zip because after School she had trouble, kept splitting on her so I had to step in and connect zip for her, she didn't give up when I was teaching her so it helped that I spoke to her teacher, did reassure bairn that there is no pressure on her.

Ripeberry
11-03-2014, 10:08 AM
Life is too short to worry about zips! I still have trouble with zips! :panic:

Maza
11-03-2014, 10:51 AM
Life is too short to worry about zips! I still have trouble with zips! :panic:

I totally agree, but does she have any clothes with easier zips on which she could practise? x

Aimee McMillan
16-03-2014, 11:03 PM
Spent a bit of time with her over weekend plus her teacher has been teaching her all week, she is still struggling with connecting the zip but she isn't giving up as easily as she was.

Sometimes she can connect zip and other times she can't, when she does connect zip without trouble, she has zipped it right up so now it is getting her to consistently connect zip. I reckon she may have mastered zipping her coat up in next couple of days.

AdeleMarie88
17-03-2014, 07:14 AM
I. Not quite sure why this is such a problem, lots of adults struggle!!


http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=yAH6FkmbZQ4

Xx

Maza
17-03-2014, 11:58 AM
I. Not quite sure why this is such a problem, lots of adults struggle!!


http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=yAH6FkmbZQ4

Xx

Fantastic! Puts it all in perspective doesn't it? :laughing:

Aimee McMillan
22-03-2014, 06:32 PM
That is her now able to zip her own coat after me and her teacher continually taught her :).

She has even zipped up the coat of child that i mind for a couple of times for me.

blue bear
22-03-2014, 07:36 PM
So pleased its sorted, well done your dd :clapping:

Aimee McMillan
22-03-2014, 10:10 PM
She now enjoys helping me with child I mind and feels important as she now zips the mindees coat whenever needed.

Bip1982
23-03-2014, 08:01 PM
my daughter started nursery last September in a school. She was 3 when she started and turned 4 in November. The teacher told her something very similar that she had to be able to do her coat up herself next week. My LO came home and mUst have thought long and hard about it (not mentioning it to me) and the following day announced she wanted to wear her button up raincoat to school. So I let her wear that one instead of the normal zip up coat with no understanding as to why.

Following week she had a certificate saying she had learnt to put her coat on and do it up herself which I laughed at because I knew she could do it already buttons she's been doing for ages....lol

She can do the zip now, she practiced loads but she clearly didn't fancy the teacher telling her to do it... ;)