Am i a nanny or what?!!

[bunnyjess]

Sorry for the moan. I'm getting a bit fed up with a parent. She's only been using me for 2 weeks (this is the third week) and I feel she's taking the mick a bit. She keeps constantly calling me when I haven't got her daughter and telling me silly things like she's constipated? When she could just tell me that to my face when I actually have her child? She also turned up today and have me £1 and asked me to walk to the shop to buy her child some crisps?! Am I overreacting? I was a bit taken back so I agreed to it but I think it's a bit rude to be honest

[Koala]

OMG - have you got a bunny boiler?? :laughing: :laughing: :laughing: I too think she is over stepping the mark - big time - and more fool you for taking part :D

Give an inch and she will take a mile.

[Ripeberry]

You need to nip this in the bud, or she will be getting you to do her laundry. I can just see her arriving one morning with the child and a whole weeks worth of washing, with full instructions on how to iron it all to perfection. Why would ANYONE in their right mind ask someone to get crisps for their kid? I take it she has only just met you two weeks ago?

[Simona]

Sorry for the moan. I'm getting a bit fed up with a parent. She's only been using me for 2 weeks (this is the third week) and I feel she's taking the mick a bit. She keeps constantly calling me when I haven't got her daughter and telling me silly things like she's constipated? When she could just tell me that to my face when I actually have her child? She also turned up today and have me £1 and asked me to walk to the shop to buy her child some crisps?! Am I overreacting? I was a bit taken back so I agreed to it but I think it's a bit rude to be honest

It could be that the parent is anxious and sharing some information with you even though her child is not in your care on the day?
If it is her only child she may be asking for your support and tapping into your knowledge...constipation can be very upsetting in some children and the parent may not know what to do?
If this is her only child and just started with you the parent may be suffering form separation anxiety...best to consider all angles.

Tell her you will discuss it with her when she next brings her child and that you will monitor the situation, record the fact she has alerted you to constipation and go from there.

Giving you money to buy food for her child could be because she is not sure you will provide some food?
Explain again what is provided by you...I am sure she will understand and be reassured

[bunnyjess]

She's got an 8 year old so she's quite clued up and she knows that I don't provide food. I just don't know what to do as it's stressing me out a bit as I don't want to be harsh but I don't want to be taken the mick out of either.
I don't mind if she txts me or tells me on the day or writes it in her daily diary but she constantly calls me and if I don't answer she doesn't leave a message she just calls back straight after.

[Mouse]

I would be straight with her. Tell her you can't always answer her phone calls, so unless it's an emergency, she will have to text you and you will reply when it's convenient. Does she phone you during work hours, or is it in your own time that she's calling?

[Simona]

She's got an 8 year old so she's quite clued up and she knows that I don't provide food. I just don't know what to do as it's stressing me out a bit as I don't want to be harsh but I don't want to be taken the mick out of either.
I don't mind if she txts me or tells me on the day or writes it in her daily diary but she constantly calls me and if I don't answer she doesn't leave a message she just calls back straight after.

OK...take it a step at the time...am I right is saying this an after school child?
If you do not provide food then agree with her she puts some food in her child satchel

With regards to the calls explain you cannot always answer the phone as you may be busy with other children and unable to leave them...could she text you and you can call her back when you are free?

If the child you are referring to is the 8 year old do you do a diary for him/her? or is this a sibling you are talking about?

As this is a new contract consider reviewing the arrangements you have with her after a few weeks and clarify any sticky points.

Think of the many times the phone rings when you are changing a nappy and cannot rush to answer?
It has happened to me and the parent told me she was worried because I had not answered her call.
I was once asked by a parent to go and collect her child's raincoat from her house because she had forgotten it...once explained I could not do that the parent understood

Hope this helps

[bunnyjess]

No it's a 12 month old. She comes to me twice a week. Her mum mostly calls me when she's not here. It's been all times of the day, early and late and on the weekend.

[Simona]

No it's a 12 month old. She comes to me twice a week. Her mum mostly calls me when she's not here. It's been all times of the day, early and late and on the weekend.

So the phone calls need to be sorted as well...do you have in your contract when you can be contacted when not working or at weekends?
Some CMs state no calls after 8pm or say before 7am...also say clearly that you do not wish to be called at weekends UNLESS very urgent.

[bunnyjess]

No I don't have anything like that. Would I put it in my contract or my policies? I'm definitely going to do that thank you

[Simona]

No I don't have anything like that. Would I put it in my contract or my policies? I'm definitely going to do that thank you

I have it in my Terms and Conditions...it basically clarifies the boundaries and understanding we are not open all hours and need time away from work like anyone else

Good luck...get back when all is resolved.