tetti
03-09-2013, 11:10 AM
I have recently taken on a 3.5 year old boy,who will be with me 2 mornings a week,from 8am to 12.30.It doesn't seem much,but after yesterday,I beg to differ :panic:
I had met him with his gran and mum before,and he seemed sweet as pie,and very much on the quiet side.
Then yesterday was his first day with me,and I took him to the park with my other mindee,a 1 year old boy,who has been with me for months.
The new boy would not stick to any activity for more than 5-10 minutes,before saying " I have had enough !",so it was a real challenge to amuse and entertain him,as he very quickly got very bored.
I gave him a drink,and he handed it to me,saying " I have had enough!",I replied "Oh,it's empty ",and he replied back crossly "No,I said, I have had enough! I did not say that it was empty ,did I ?"
I told him off and said "There is no need to be impolite sweetheart".
He would not hold my hand or hold onto the buggy,and would not stop when I told him to.
He then ran straight into the road,and I ran after him with the buggy,telling him off "You must NOT run straight into the road.It is very dangerous". He refused to look at me or even stop, so I said out loud and firm "Please look at me when I am talking to you" (he refused), "You must never run into the road,it is very dangerous.And you must ALWAYS hold my hand or hold onto the buggy. We want to keep you safe,don't we ?"
I also had to be stern with him about washing his hands after using the toilet,he refused to,and I said that "We always have to wash our hands after going to the toilet,just like we always have to wash our hands before we eat",to which he'd reply "Oh gosh !". I have never seen such behaviour in such a young child.
I sent his mother a text as she was at work,telling her of the situation,and I also didn't want to discuss the situation in front of the boy.
She was extremely apologetic.
When she came to collect him with her mother,they were both very sorry,and told me to please be very firm with him,to not be afraid to tell him off and to put him on the naughty step.They both assured me that his behaviour was very out of nature for him,and that he was probably just trying to test the waters as this is a new arrangement.
Before I took him on,I was told that he was very easygoing and not fussy,but when it comes to food,he doesn't seem to like anything,and he wants to control everything we do " I don't want to do that,I am fed up,I have had enough !",and I replied each time "When you are with us,you have to do what we do sweetheart".
I felt so exhausted after he left that one neighbour said "Are you ok ? You look absolutely deflated !"
I badly need the money,and I cannot afford to let this child go until I fill another vacancy.And part of me hope that I can manage to change his behaviour,or that these are just teething problems as he's new here
He does go to nursery part time,so this is not the first time he has been in a childcare setting.
He lives with his mum who is very young (early 20's) and she separated from his dad when he was 2 (the dad is still in his life)
I am also a single parent,so I am not blaming the mum here,but I just wonder if maybe she is just too soft on him?
If you have any tips on how to handle this situation in the best way,I would be every so grateful .I am dreading the next time he comes :/,how bad is that ?
I had met him with his gran and mum before,and he seemed sweet as pie,and very much on the quiet side.
Then yesterday was his first day with me,and I took him to the park with my other mindee,a 1 year old boy,who has been with me for months.
The new boy would not stick to any activity for more than 5-10 minutes,before saying " I have had enough !",so it was a real challenge to amuse and entertain him,as he very quickly got very bored.
I gave him a drink,and he handed it to me,saying " I have had enough!",I replied "Oh,it's empty ",and he replied back crossly "No,I said, I have had enough! I did not say that it was empty ,did I ?"
I told him off and said "There is no need to be impolite sweetheart".
He would not hold my hand or hold onto the buggy,and would not stop when I told him to.
He then ran straight into the road,and I ran after him with the buggy,telling him off "You must NOT run straight into the road.It is very dangerous". He refused to look at me or even stop, so I said out loud and firm "Please look at me when I am talking to you" (he refused), "You must never run into the road,it is very dangerous.And you must ALWAYS hold my hand or hold onto the buggy. We want to keep you safe,don't we ?"
I also had to be stern with him about washing his hands after using the toilet,he refused to,and I said that "We always have to wash our hands after going to the toilet,just like we always have to wash our hands before we eat",to which he'd reply "Oh gosh !". I have never seen such behaviour in such a young child.
I sent his mother a text as she was at work,telling her of the situation,and I also didn't want to discuss the situation in front of the boy.
She was extremely apologetic.
When she came to collect him with her mother,they were both very sorry,and told me to please be very firm with him,to not be afraid to tell him off and to put him on the naughty step.They both assured me that his behaviour was very out of nature for him,and that he was probably just trying to test the waters as this is a new arrangement.
Before I took him on,I was told that he was very easygoing and not fussy,but when it comes to food,he doesn't seem to like anything,and he wants to control everything we do " I don't want to do that,I am fed up,I have had enough !",and I replied each time "When you are with us,you have to do what we do sweetheart".
I felt so exhausted after he left that one neighbour said "Are you ok ? You look absolutely deflated !"
I badly need the money,and I cannot afford to let this child go until I fill another vacancy.And part of me hope that I can manage to change his behaviour,or that these are just teething problems as he's new here
He does go to nursery part time,so this is not the first time he has been in a childcare setting.
He lives with his mum who is very young (early 20's) and she separated from his dad when he was 2 (the dad is still in his life)
I am also a single parent,so I am not blaming the mum here,but I just wonder if maybe she is just too soft on him?
If you have any tips on how to handle this situation in the best way,I would be every so grateful .I am dreading the next time he comes :/,how bad is that ?