View Full Version : anyone else feel lonely?

13-08-2013, 09:00 AM
I love my job, although not doing schoolies again!

BUT feel a bit lonely at times. Other childminders in my area just stay home and never attend groups or go to the park. I dont like visiting friends with little ones or inviting them here so feel very isolated.

Go to groups 2 mornings a week so get to chat to other adults there but would like to mix with other minders.

oh well just having a moan, thanks for being there

13-08-2013, 09:13 AM
Yep feel the same

Other cm Round here rather do there own thing or are very clicky can't win really lol

13-08-2013, 09:33 AM
Yep feel the same

Other cm Round here rather do there own thing or are very clicky can't win really lol

Same around here, cm and nannies already have clicky groups, I know a few but it is a downside :(

13-08-2013, 10:08 AM
Yes, I feel lonely recently. I know what you mean about not wanting to go to other people's houses and taking mindees, I just don't feel comfortable and don't really relax anyway because I'm watching mindees all the time. The stay at home mums meet each other for coffee but I can't drag mindees off for coffee either all afternoon. Sometimes they all meet up and go swimming but I can't do that - too many kids etc. I have started going to Slimming World again one evening a week and I enjoy the adult company there. x

13-08-2013, 10:15 AM
It's a real downside to the job.

I'm taking new babies on nxt week and I know for the first month or so its going to be difficult getting out. I have been going to park and a toddler group which has been lovely for me and the children. So it's going to be hard.
This forum really helps though!

13-08-2013, 10:36 AM
Yes I know how you feel. I have 2 19month olds and it can be lonely but I am trying to take them out more and more now as it does me good to get out. I also invite my friends round with their children.

13-08-2013, 10:56 AM
Guess this is biggest downside of job, other than difficult parents.

I also go to slimming world and have lots of adult company out of work but would love to meet up with other minders during the day. I used to work in a large day nursery and some days just miss the company.

13-08-2013, 11:12 AM
I'm lucky in that my auntie is a childminder too so we regularly meet up with her and her mindees.

Sometimes we go to visit my old childminder who has grandchildren the same age as my mindees, as do a few of my friends.

Sometimes my Grandad gets bored so will join us in the park for a chat lol.

After all that I'm quite ready for a day to myself lol

13-08-2013, 11:34 AM
Yes, I feel very lonely, although I have met up with another childminder this morning at the park. She has just registered. I've gone nearly 6yrs not knowing anyone but now have someone to spend time with whilst working :D So a trip to the park this morning was lovely rather than me just sitting on a bench watching the children play.
I hate the summer holidays and am making decisions not to work all week next summer. Maybe having Mondays off.

The problem I also have is although Ive lived in this town for 13yrs I've not really made any good friends. I know a huge amount of people to say Hello to in passing and have a natter but only 1 to socialise with so I do struggle at times. It gets me down every now again because I tried hard to make friends when we moved here but it's so difficult.

But then I think about my 2 lovely children, my dh and my friend and know it cant be all that bad :D

I always come on here which keeps my spirits up. When September comes and I get back into routine with school drop off, toddler groups I shall be feeling much better

13-08-2013, 11:48 AM
I spend alot of the holidays doing things on my own with mindees. I know other minders locally but not to meet up with and although I've suggested it, I've never been taken up on the idea. I do meet with a couple of minders I met on the forum though :-D I do see friends with my LOs but most of my friends don't have LOs!

hectors house
13-08-2013, 12:18 PM
I don't tend to go to childminder groups but just normal toddler groups - sometimes there will be a childminder there I can have a chat with, other than that have a couple of childminders I can go out walking with mindees and dogs or meet up at the park. I never go to other childminders houses with the mindees and rarely visit my friends when minding - all their children have grown up and they are mostly out at work during the day. Sometimes I do feel very lonely thats why the forum is so addictive!

13-08-2013, 01:13 PM
Ohh dear.. All these lonely childminders!! Chin up ladies its not all bad ;-)) any of you in north manchester?? Ur welcome round mine or meet up anytime x x

13-08-2013, 02:41 PM
I'm London if any one wants to meet up lol

13-08-2013, 03:26 PM
I was told this was a lonely job before I began and it is, but I like it.
I also worked in a nursery for 6 years but with some not very nice people so me time is great now!
I like the fact that I can 'choose' my own workmates, if I don't click with someone I don't have to
It's upsetting to read that others feel lonely, I think it must be because we're all thrown with the sch hols and hopefully spirits will lift come September.
Sending hugs to lonely ones xxxxx:group hug:

13-08-2013, 04:02 PM
Same story here...I only meet up with 1 cm regularly, i know probably 10 others quite well from courses/groups but although they are polite they aren't overly friendly and never seem that keen to meet up.

I don't smell,honest!.....I hope!:blush:

I can get lonely and tbh i'm dreading September as all of my big ones are leaving me for school and my oldest mindee will be 26 months so conversation will be even less...ah well,I feel like I talk to myself most of the time anyway so it should make no difference:laughing:

13-08-2013, 04:06 PM
It's such a shame to hear that so many of you feel lonely,I go to music groups,shops (lots of people stop to chat) story time at the library,more than happy to meet up if you are in Sutton Coldfield x

13-08-2013, 04:19 PM
yes it can be very lonely, but one of my mums is hoping to register so hopefully I won't be too lonely for long

13-08-2013, 09:45 PM
It can get lonely but I try and get out everyday and it seems to help

14-08-2013, 02:46 AM
It can get lonely but I try and get out everyday and it seems to help

This is what i do, if i was alone for 10 hours with 2 toddlers all day in the house id go nuts!! ;)

14-08-2013, 05:56 AM
Aww i know what you mean. :( ive only been minding for a short while but its not to bad.

I go to my local childrens centre twice a week and chew anybodys ear off on the school run!!! Poor people!!

Also a mummy from my town stareted A fb group called mummys meet up. So we post things on there where we can meet up. With kids during thd day or just adults in the evening x We are going to hatfield forrest tomorrow.. :) maybe worth an idea. Dont have to just meet up with other cm!!

★ xx

14-08-2013, 06:24 AM
I was fine until my buddy moved :-(

When sept comes and routine comes back it will all be fine. My big thing is hubby takes the car to work so can't make it to any other childminders outings.

14-08-2013, 06:47 AM
I live in a small village, don't use the car and no other childminders. I'm very rarely lonely though, I have now been childminding 23yrs and have become used to it. I can't imagine doing anything else!

14-08-2013, 07:02 AM
Its definitely the school holiday blues for me. Come Sept it will be mon, tue, thur and fri morning toddler group and thur morning starbucks visit before toddler group opens. There are always lots of people to talk to there :D I always struggle with the summer hols and can be sat in the house all day sometimes with no adult conversation at all.

Only 9 days left as mine go back on 29th and with B/H and a friday off when I look at it like that im quite excited...lol

14-08-2013, 07:13 AM
Yes Definately did before I had my daughter but she's made me some great 'mummy friends' as i call them. I'm however feeling it a bit now in the holidays as all my groups have stopped. I normally go to a group Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and every other Wednesday but I'm having to find different things to do now and I find it harder when children centre workers aren't around (I have permission to leave children with them whilst I pop to the loo) especially as I have three under 18 months. Off to Zoo today with children centre and some friends today tho so should be a nice day (although busy and hectic lol)

mrs robbie williams
14-08-2013, 04:11 PM
Definitely, although I do make sure we get out everyday term time is better as groups as school runs so see other mums, think I'm just having down week, dd 18 isn't talking to me and I'm still not comfortable with her bf living here plus got abcess on tooth so in antibiotics although am ok to drink so having a vino although only country manor, took my two to zoo today which was no e but again no adult company, mtg a friend tomoro with ds and her girls and her gorgeous baby for a picnic :) need to snap out of it xx

jax clinch
14-08-2013, 04:38 PM
I don't feel lonely because I invite my friends with children round for a cuppa and a natter which breaks up the week, I've joined a childminding group, and toddler groups, but was does get to me sometimes is It would be quite nice once in a while to get an invite to my friends houses just for a change of scenery!!!!

14-08-2013, 05:47 PM
Hi i was very lonely to begin and i considered if cm was for me.. Since i have started going to the same groups every week where i have made friends (most are cms) i now know all the local mindees and we all go for coffees or park together so mon-fri we are always out. X

14-08-2013, 06:39 PM
Hi supermummy where in London are you?

14-08-2013, 06:52 PM
Hi supermummy where in London are you?

South east London (Lambeth)

14-08-2013, 07:45 PM
Chance would be a fine thing!!

DH is of work with a broken hand and is driving me nuts!!

Gets in shower in morning, just when I'm about to!
Decides to cook a fry up at exactly the same hour parents arrive with children
Sits on iPad Moaning about noise
Potters around garden moaning about mess
Comes in from a walk moaning about nappy smells
Decides to make a sandwich whilst I'm in the middle of preparing mindees lunch
Tells me I'm bossy when I ask mindees to stop fidgeting about and sit still whilst they eat
Moans about wee in a potty that has been there less than 10min
Complains about how often the house needs hoovering!!

Glad all my carving knives are blunt!!



jackie 7
14-08-2013, 09:40 PM
I know what you mean. When I met murphf we did talk about you. We wished you were closer to Dublin. When I moved out of London I had s friend here but recently I have really started to
Meet others and talk during the day. It was the same when I was a nanny. It takes time but it is hard.

14-08-2013, 09:46 PM
ah well if only a bit of being alone was only problem, as just posted found out yesterday my landlady is selling house so more to worry about now

14-08-2013, 09:51 PM
ah well if only a bit of being alone was only problem, as just posted found out yesterday my landlady is selling house so more to worry about now

Ah no Ziggy you aren't that long there are you?! Sure while you are moving come move by me, lots of work around here!!! Seriously hope it works out ok, is there much rented accommodation near you to choose from?

14-08-2013, 10:12 PM
Ah no Ziggy you aren't that long there are you?! Sure while you are moving come move by me, lots of work around here!!! Seriously hope it works out ok, is there much rented accommodation near you to choose from?

yes luckily there are a few, my first instinct was to find somewhere asap but now i've decided to take my time, house going up for sale 1st september and will be shocked if it sells quickly plus my contract doesnt end till 1st november so i panicking a lot less tonight

thanks for your support, much appreciated xx