children

[Emmalou77]

I was wondering how many mums and dads out there agree with the opinion that if you have a third child (of your own) he or she will be left out?

[FussyElmo]

Sorry but what a load of rubbish :D

[Mrsh3103]

I agree, what a load of rubbish.

[Nicola Carlyle]

I think to agree with a statement like that is utter rubbish. I'm not saying that this does not happen of course but I really do not agree with it. I have two children of my own. I have no desire to have any more but if I did I could never leave them out. They would all get as much of my time as each other. x

[Emra81]

I'm the oldest of 3 siblings and completely disagree. My parents made sure we were all included and made to feel special. I think my brother and sister would agree...it's a parenting thing, not a '3 kids' thing.

[bunyip]

Speaking as the youngest of three, I can safely say I'm perfectly normal, and I'm sure everyone on this forum will vouch for that.


Er, .........................guys?

Guys - you will vouch for me.................. won't you.............???

Right..............?????

Hello.........................??????????????? Anyone............................................ .................................................. ..........?

Yours, normally,
bunyip

:joker::happy banana::jump for joy::jump for joy::jump for joy::happy banana::joker:

[tulip0803]

I am the oldest of three and have had three children myself - think I disagree with that statement:rolleyes:

[westbrom44]

I would disagree.

I have three children and I am also one of three children and have never had any problems.

[FussyElmo]

[QUOTE=bunyip;1284081]Speaking as the youngest of three, I can safely say I'm perfectly normal, and I'm sure everyone on this forum will vouch for that.


Er, .........................guys?

Guys - you will vouch for me.................. won't you.............???

Right..............?????

Hello.........................??????????????? Anyone............................................ .................................................. ..........?

Yours, normally,
bunyip




I will vouch for you being one of the most normal people on here :littleangel::joker::ROFL1:

[hollyvilla]

I have three children, now aged 32, 27 and 25. They are all loved equally and never left out. They are all very different, but equally special in their own way. Now my husband is one of three, and as the oldest he is often left out, the younger two taking priority. So it depends on your family.

[Emmalou77]

Thanks for replying, :-)
I think when people say this they mean two kids will play well together (not that parents leave them out) but when there are three one will feel less included by the kids. I do like your replies and want a third child myself, its the MIL that says the above!

[Tealady]

Thanks for replying, :-)
I think when people say this they mean two kids will play well together (not that parents leave them out) but when there are three one will feel less included by the kids. I do like your replies and want a third child myself, its the MIL that says the above!

Erm two kids play well together??? Never met my two! Sometimes they want to do different things, sometimes one wants to do something by themselves and the other wants to join in. Adding another into the mix wouldn't make things any better or any worse in my opinion. The dynamics might shift but that's it.

I don't think there is any perfect number of children to have. There are Pro's and Con's to all numbers and then their personalities have an effect to.

We toyed with the idea of having a third but my DH was a bit slower to want that than me. Now DS is coming up for 4 I don't want to go back to Babydom.

[shortstuff]

I must be the exception to the rule x sorry but i was the middle of three and made to feel like i didnt belong. Maybe because i was the only girl but who knows.

I do carry baggage but make sure my DS gets so much love and attention there is no way he will feel like an inconvenience. I was brought up only feeling useful when one or both of my brothers wanted or needed something. Oh and then number 4 came along and it got worse x

[TooEarlyForGin?]

I agree, there is no right number. But don't think it worked in my experience. It depends on the family. I am the youngest of 3 with 2 older brothers, they were only a year apart and I came 6 years later, and although loved by my parents, felt left out as my brothers were a pair and I was the odd one out. Today I am not close to them at all and can go years without really speaking to them. They also considered me to be spoilt, as I came along a bit later, my parents were financially in a better place and I was taken abroad on some if the first package holidays when I was a young teenager, and they had already left home. My DH is the eldest of 3 and is close to his brother who is only 2 years his junior, but not close to his sister who is 11 years younger, so similar to my circumstances but at the opposite end of the tree. I remind him it isn't her fault when she was born ( she is also accused of being spoilt). I never wanted 3 kids due to my personal experience, said I would rather have 4 or 2. Although my 2 are 5 years apart and seem to hate each other...... Go figure!

[Bumble Beez]

I was told to stick with 2...apparently easier, however I wouldn't be without my DS3 and he is most certainly never left out, or the older two actually.
I was an only child and although I had a lovely childhood I would have loved to have a brother or sister :(
So I was adamant I wanted at least two...I love having three boys and wouldn't change it at all!!

Sarah x

[adedwards68]

I've got 4 children, all treated the same. I'm the eldest of 3 children and we were all treated the same. It's only now that one of my siblings who is always having relationship problems, can't seem to cope with her kids that we are treated differently My mum is always looking after her kids and mine,especially the youngest, seems to miss out on nanny and grandad time.
Moan over! Lol

[Samijanec]

I've had five and I've never left any of them out. Each is so special to me and I spoilt the lot of them! :)

[Chimps Childminding]

It happen in our house to a certain extent! I have a twin brother who I am really close too, and 9 years later my parents had a surprise (unplanned) third child (another boy) I never been as close to him due to the age difference. as he was starting school we were almost leaving so never really had a lot in common :( and he was only 11 when I got married and left home!

[Tinkerbell1979]

Totally disagree!!!!!


My 3 are all treated equally and all play together and a get cuddles. Often I'm sat in middle of sofa with my 8 year old cuddle me to my left, 6 year old on my right with my 3 year old on my lap :-)

[The Juggler]

i was the middle one and everyone used to gang up on ME :laughing:

[hollyvilla]

I don't think it matters how many children you have, it is entirely dependant on circumstances and characters. I have a brother who is 2 years younger than me, but circumstances happened that saw him and my parents emigrate when he was 16 and I was 18, I have seen him about 5 times in the last 35yrs and speak about once a year if that.

[loocyloo]

I have a step brother who is 13 yrs older than me, we've never been close as he only lived with us some of the time once my mum married his dad, and then went to live overseas. I have 2 younger half brothers - sometimes we get on, sometimes we don't and I haven't spoken to one of them since Christmas, the other I 'talk' to via text or email sometimes.

my mum still panders to my younger brothers ( in their 30's ) but not me, as i'm capable of looking after myself! she moans about having to do things for them, but when I say DON'T DO IT THEN, she gets upset and wants to look after them ( neither currently have partners, although one brother does have a child ) they get on sometimes, and at other times REALLY don't get on.

growing up I never felt as if we were treated differently, even by my step dad, apart from the obvious things that my brothers were 7/9yrs younger than me and so we did different things.

I have 2 children and didn't want a 3rd ( although if we had had a 3rd it would have been fine! we almost had a 3rd just because MIL kept saying 'you won't have any more, you've got your pigeon pair' ( whatever that means! ) but DH & I put our sensible heads on and decided that having a 3rd child just to say up yours to MIL wasn't the right reason!!! :laughing: )

sometimes my 2 get on and sometimes they don't!

[Allie]

My three girls sometimes got on and sometimes didn't now at 33, 30 and 27 they are good friends and help each other out. None of them seems unhappy to have been one of three

[Emmalou77]

Thank you for all your replies. Having read them I think the main thing I should do is not have them too far apart should circumstances allow this. I have a 7 year old, 3.5 year old and am thinking of having a third may 2015 making my youngest 5.5 years which is the max gap for me and cant wait! :-)

[line6]

I'm the youngest of 3, dh is the middle one of 3. We have 3 children. I'd say that at some point one of the kids may be left out yes but the next minute the dynamics will change and it'll be someone else. Could be the same with 4 , 5 or 6 etc. it probably also depends on the age/sexes. I'm the youngest of 3 girls but my older sisters were closer in age than they were to me. My kids have the same age gaps but there is a boy in the middle so its completely different. As a generalisation I'd say that having 3 means one is left out is nonsense.

[jackie 7]

I am the 2nd youngest of 7. I always felt I had been adopted! Now as an adult I really only get on well with 1 sister. Don't worry about numbers. Tell them that they will get the attention they need when they need it.