The fb page... [Archive] - Childminding Forum

Becci26

12-07-2013, 06:49 AM

Does anyone else feel that lots of discussions on there are just turning into rants, competition and fellow cm's having a go at each other?

I'm in 2 minds of it tbh as it just doesn't seem to have the same 'feel' as the forum which is a shame as I love this place and u guys :-)

I don't want the thread to turn into a bashing of the page I just wondered if I am alone in feeling this?

Daisy De

12-07-2013, 07:12 AM

No you are not alone, was thinking the same which is a shame, some people seem to get very aggressive, we are all different and all have our own opinions and ways of doing things, no one is necessarily right or wrong, just different, variety is the spice of life :D

loocyloo

12-07-2013, 07:19 AM

i'm not on facebook but I often hear the same comments from people about it!

bunyip

12-07-2013, 07:46 AM

Hi Becci :waving:,

I must confess I completely avoid FB in all its forms, as I see and hear so many bad consequences flowing from its use and abuse.

Is the FB page much like this Forum?

I find the Forum invaluable. I find CMing to be very isolating, especially in contrast to my previous job where I knew and worked alongside 100's of colleagues. More so because my local CM group is run like a sort of childcare mafia and my face certainly does not fit.

I love the fact that the Forum has so many facets to it. It can be a place to come for support, practical advice, open discussion, or (sometimes) for the occasional rant. It's amazing that we have a 'one-stop-shop' here for serious news, a bit of joking, lively debate, and an i-hug when needed. :thumbsup:

Rants are ok so long as they're to let off steam for a moment and then get on with the rest of life. They're a problem when they begin to feed people's prejudices and inform their thinking (or lack of it.)

One of the biggest dangers of working alone is that we (I) do everything and see everything from our own viewpoint with little else in the way of ideas, opinions and another pair of eyes/ears to help us (me) think there might be another way. That's why differing views and discussion are a vital part of the Forum. I get a huge amount out of the discussions and knowing we can disagree without falling out. But I do notice there often seems to be a 'group mentality' and an expectation that we will all just agree with each other all the time, which can only lead to a bland, sterile forum if perpetuated. There seems to be a notion that any sort of disagreement or non-conformism amounts to 'disrespect' or 'rudeness.' There is a distinct hint of 'defensiveness' to towards those of us who dare to disagree sometimes (hence the unpleasant nature of some of the PMs I receive from time to time.)

I sometimes think Richard should set up a 'Just for Sycophancy' board, where we can post those threads where we only want members who agree with us. :huh:

Thankfully, what I've described is the exception rather than the norm. Certainly nothing like enough to put me off what is a fantastic place to meet other CMs. :clapping:

I also struggle with the undercurrent of anti-nursery, anti-babysitter, anti-parent philosophy that surfaces quite regularly.

I'm not sure now if that amounts to a rant (and possibly a slightly off-topic one at that) - hey ho. :rolleyes:

AgentTink

12-07-2013, 07:49 AM

im another non-fan of the facebook page. I am really uneasy that a parent can so easily join it, and see everything that is being said, and it at times can seem so unprofessional. I know parents can join this forum, but i would imagine as a parent when you have seen a few posts you would not be inclined to follow it everyday, whereas on the facebook group it constantly appears in your newsfeed, and most people now adays have instant access to facebook through their mobiles so it is always there, every moment of the day.

charlottenash

12-07-2013, 07:49 AM

I looked up this Facebook page and couldn't find it?

hectors house

12-07-2013, 07:50 AM

I am not on Facebook but have wondered recently if more people are using that now rather than the forum - as it seems to have gone quiet - maybe it's just the nice weather - I just hope we aren't being "diluted".

Mouse

12-07-2013, 07:58 AM

Which Facebook group is this?

I'm on so many and can never quite remember which is which! I'm very surprised at some of the things that are written, particularly because the poster is so easily identifiable, using either their real name or their business name. Even if the groups are closed it doesn't mean they're safe. I only post things on FB that I'd be happy for the whole world to see, as in theory they could.

jackie 7

12-07-2013, 08:02 AM

I haven't seen the fr page. I only use mine for family and friends. This forum suits my needs and I worry about the privacy settings on FBI worry me.

supermumy

12-07-2013, 08:16 AM

I love it as it quite easy to access on phone etc like this one but I do agree it is getting very argumentative now and some posts are just uncalled for but I suppose with all big large groups it I going to get that at times

i love seein the photos of settings and they have given me some great ideas and don't feel competition as we only do what is best for us and our own setting :)

sarah707

12-07-2013, 09:39 AM

We are really struggling to admin it to be honest with you.

We have some really good, useful, helpful, inspirational posts and members - and some who just seem to want to pick fights.

I am also starting to suspect we have a couple of trolls who are trying to make trouble :(

The rules are clear and we are taking posts off if there are complaints - but we can't be on there all day and we are finding that by the time one of us logs on there can be 50+ comments on a thread all attacking / defending etc.

We keep asking members - please tag an admin - please let us know - please stop posting and it will drop down the list - but we aren't being heard.

If anyone has any constructive ideas about how we can better manage it please let us know. We will be very happy to hear from you here or privately.

I think that it is so important that the Childminding Forum has a voice on Facebook. We just need to help each other to police it effectively :D

sarah707

12-07-2013, 09:41 AM

Oh and out of interest - the forum stats show that it had its busiest month last month - for new members and for posts - so FB is definitely not taking people away from here - they are complementing each other nicely and getting different membership groups interested and involved in sharing good practice :clapping: :clapping:

charlottenash

12-07-2013, 09:50 AM

Sarah what is the name of this page?

Can I suggest (if its possible) that the posts are read by admin before becoming public? A pain I know, but could make it more exclusive and friendly.

sarah707

12-07-2013, 09:54 AM

Rick

12-07-2013, 10:55 AM

Sarah what is the name of this page?

Can I suggest (if its possible) that the posts are read by admin before becoming public? A pain I know, but could make it more exclusive and friendly.

I'm not an expert but I don't think you could do it anyway. We wouldn't have time to do that and people want to reply to each other in real time. We try out best to delete incorrect or aggressive comments etc but as Sarah says we can't be on there all the time, we are volunteers with full time jobs!

bunyip

12-07-2013, 10:59 AM

https://www.facebook.com/groups/independentchildminders/

It's a lovely group - just a few issues which I am tempted to put down to the heat and the odd troll - one of whom we have spotted and is about to be deleted.

xx

If you would like "deleted" to become "liquidated", just give me an address. :cool:

Bunyip's Assassination Services Ltd.
(a wholly owned subsidiary of Bunyip's Childminding Corporation.)

supermumy

12-07-2013, 11:01 AM

If you would like "deleted" to become "liquidated", just give me an address. :cool:

Bunyip's Assassination Services Ltd.
(a wholly owned subsidiary of Bunyip's Childminding Corporation.)

Lmao this mad giggle

ziggy

12-07-2013, 11:06 AM

I stopped using it after first day as i was concerned parents may access it

hectors house

12-07-2013, 11:06 AM

If it is the same members who post on here how come there is such a Jekyll & Hyde personality change in the way people reply to Facebook posts? - I generally find on the forum that people are polite, I know I generally check my replies before I post to think "is that reply going to upset or offend anyone" :)

Rick

12-07-2013, 11:22 AM

I stopped using it after first day as i was concerned parents may access it

You would be surprised (or maybe not!) at some of the things we delete. You can obviously see the person's real name and then they go and talk about their minded children or in a way that makes them identifiable, or they post pictures of them. We cannot vet every person but we can make a judgment on individuals and remove them if they are aren't respecting the rules of the group.

butterfly

12-07-2013, 11:42 AM

I do wonder if on Facebook people change the way they think before posting. I think we're so used to be able to post a quick comment on a fb status that people type and send before really thinking about what they've put. When I come onto the forum I come with a different frame of mind - that of getting advice and supporting other childminders. I think carefully before posting - whether it would offend anyone or whether it is actually helpful to respond and whether I can bring a different or useful perspective to an issue.

I decided to take myself off the fb page mainly because it was clogging up my news feed and I feel that fb is social and the forum is work. I come onto the forum when i'm in 'work-mode' and want to talk about work things. I go onto fb to chill and relax and catch up with friends so I see them differently.

WibbleWobble

12-07-2013, 11:58 AM

I said the b word on a post ... I apologise. But I am not a troll, fol der re doll

Wibble the non troll x

supermumy

12-07-2013, 11:59 AM

I said the b word on a post ... I apologise. But I am not a troll, fol der re doll

Wibble the non troll x

Oh no u should be punished! No wine tonight for u!

ziggy

12-07-2013, 12:13 PM

You would be surprised (or maybe not!) at some of the things we delete. You can obviously see the person's real name and then they go and talk about their minded children or in a way that makes them identifiable, or they post pictures of them. We cannot vet every person but we can make a judgment on individuals and remove them if they are aren't respecting the rules of the group.

my parents dont know i use this site and i dont want them to know:blush:, it is place i know i can come and have a moan to others who will understand. if they see i use the facebook page they may then come on here

sarah707

12-07-2013, 01:21 PM

ziggy

12-07-2013, 01:23 PM

my concern is that if they see i use site's facebook page they will then find this site and see my complaints, requests for advice etc.

hectors house

12-07-2013, 02:18 PM

my concern is that if they see i use site's facebook page they will then find this site and see my complaints, requests for advice etc.

I guess then we need to put anything that is confidential in the "Green members only" section - then blocking parents as well as childminders who haven't got to the 300+ posts.

Memina

12-07-2013, 03:10 PM

I guess then we need to put anything that is confidential in the "Green members only" section - then blocking parents as well as childminders who haven't got to the 300+ posts.

Can we do that after I reach 300 please after 4 years im almost there lol.

Simona

12-07-2013, 03:30 PM

I am sure there are a few parents - and we have representatives from Pacey and Ukcma - and of course any post can be copied and sent to anyone.

But if people are respectful and responsible about what they post it shouldn't matter who can read it!!

I sent a member a message yesterday - just to let you know I am deleting your post because ...

Her message back - oh no! I wouldn't want parents to read it! I didn't think...

We are doing our best - we are dealing with problems as we see them - we can't be there all the time!

Members have to take responsibility for their posts and think before they type!! xx

To troll or not to troll? Are these 'trollers' nasty and up to mischief and switch from Jackill to Hyde? or as referred in Norse folklore they are: demons?? not an appealing label to have
A troll is also a supernatural creature living in caves or mountains and can be either a dwarf or a giant...whatever I would say 'exterminate' or use Bunyip method!!

As if we didn't have enough to deal with at present...feel sorry for those who have to patrol the 'trolls' on Facebook!

Petshrinklj

12-07-2013, 03:55 PM

I'm a member if Facebook group. I'm not on there very often though so haven't noticed any arguments. Feel like I've missed out now lol.

leeanne910

12-07-2013, 04:25 PM

Im on the fb group. I dont use it much. Is enjoy seeing good advice and pics and if i come across anything such as i think i found some effective learning pdfs that i loved and used and wanted to share. But people should be going on there thinking "anything i write anyone can see and bite me on the bum!" So i just ignore the sillyness....its up to them...if they cant use fbook appropriately then im sure some parents of theirs or people they network with will be making judgements ;)

Becci26

12-07-2013, 04:46 PM

Will pop back on and reply properly a bit later once I have a full tummy and a less weary brain haha!
Lots of interesting posts, have been following through the day but not been able to reply as its been a funny old day!
I have however made the decision to (for the time being anyway) leave both the childminding groups on fb as they are not for me.... :-(

chriss

12-07-2013, 05:53 PM

WibbleWobble

12-07-2013, 06:48 PM

Just read a post on FB from a cm and the child can obviously be identified as I clicked on her name and of course it sent me straight to her page. At least on here we are anonymous to a certain extent.

Would not be happy if I was a parent and saw my childs cm discussing them in such a public place

I have a fb profile which has nothing to do with work. I rarely mention even being a cm. I do link to stuff like petitions but I don't mention names of children unless the parent posts something with child's name but them it will be just their initial. I am friends with all my parents but I have had their kids for over 3 years some of them. I have fab relationships with them. And an example of this is I have had my bank account hacked into and £500 taken. I have posted this and within 5 mins most of my patents have text me to say they will pay tomorrow in cash ( two weeks early) if I need the money.
And those who really know me will know I don't even use my real name on Facebook.

Wibble incognito xxx

Bumble Beez

12-07-2013, 06:57 PM

Not a fan of FB...was on there a while ago but after numerous comments from people who I suspect were just stirring or wanting to create trouble (and a lot of pleading from by DH) I came off and have never looked back.
I do at times miss some of the groups like the local for sale groups and the local minding group...but there is always eBay and I've got everyone's number who I need too.

Sarah x

marnieb

12-07-2013, 08:23 PM

Same as you mighty Wibble - my FB page is mine, I am only friends on there with 1 parent I mind for as we were friends before I had her children, I so not mention minding or anything connected to it. I am very surprised about the posts on the cm groups, when I said I saw another cm over minding 90% of the replies were actually in her favour!!

Daisy De

12-07-2013, 09:15 PM

FussyElmo

12-07-2013, 09:28 PM

I'm on FB but never ever mention anything about children or childminding, its purely for my friends/relatives and for me to find out what they are all up to.

I also play Candy Crush, Song Pop and Words with Friends :blush:

Totally agree.

Tonight I have taken my children and my mindee to the school disco. Now I wasn't working and mindee stayed for tea and came to the disco else she would have had to miss. Now I have photos of her but they have been sent to mum via email because I cant bring myself to post the photos. Now if they want to tag me that's ok but I wont :thumbsup:

Kirstylob

12-07-2013, 10:18 PM

I guess then we need to put anything that is confidential in the "Green members only" section - then blocking parents as well as childminders who haven't got to the 300+ posts.

I agree to a point but I'm not quite at the 300 posts post yet so I could potentially miss out on lots of valuable advice if this happened. And surely its the newer minders who tend to need and/or ask for advice and they wouldn't then be able to either.
Is there anyway that the members area could be made just for Childminders- no parents allowed?!!

Kiddleywinks

12-07-2013, 10:59 PM

I don't have any parents on my personal FB, as it's for family and friends, and the odd game.
I rarely post about work on there as I do try hard to keep my work and personal life separate as much as possible.
When I started minding, I changed my profile pics and settings so that parents don't know if it IS me so they can't add me either.

I ended up creating another profile on facebook due to all the different sources of information over MGC so linked that to my forum name so I can now comment over work related facebook and still not be identified. I don't have any pictures on there. Initially I did feel guilty about that, lets face it, we like to know who we are talking to visually, but at the same time, I wouldn't want parents to take offence to anything I said in a professional capacity.

I made a personal comment on my personal profile this week, that I definitely wouldn't want anyone that didn't truly know me as a person, like my family and friends of many many years do, seeing that as I'd probably be reported to Ofsted! :laughing:

Work is work, personal life is private :thumbsup:

Wibble! You mean your name isn't really Wibble?!! I'm shocked! You had me fooled :cool: :laughing: :thumbsup:

Simona

13-07-2013, 08:11 PM

On the hottest day of the year I did my Child Protection refresher today and Facebook was a subject we discussed!!!
It does relate to safeguarding yourself and your children after all.

What goes on there is totally out of any cm's control...just be aware that you are responsible for 'safeguarding 'your children and your setting and things can get out of control because some parents may not understand the implications???

Facebook is a 'social' media not a professional way to connect with parents...be sure you have it in your contract that parents are not allowed to refer to you, your practice or anything related to your work..if they do you run the risk of them breaching Data protection and Confidentiality

Food for thought!

FussyElmo

13-07-2013, 08:23 PM

Strangely Simona I was on safeguarding as well today.

They stressed quite strongly to always be professional not to share pictures of the families, or rant about your day or families.
They also to be aware of sites like moshi monsters where there are chat rooms linked to it. Grooming on these sights is quite high :( They did say it was very hard in this technology age but to use sensible precautions.

oxfordshirecm

13-07-2013, 09:07 PM

I rarely actually post on Facebook- I go on it a lot but normally just to lurk around the different rooms and stalk a few people... Good that doesn't paint a good picture of me :)

Bumble Beez

14-07-2013, 05:33 AM

I rarely actually post on Facebook- I go on it a lot but normally just to lurk around the different rooms and stalk a few people... Good that doesn't paint a good picture of me :)

Lol...that's made me giggle! Don't think you're alone in doing that...:)

Sarah x

beachgirl29

14-07-2013, 06:05 AM

I have a business page on fb but my parents all signed a form and are happy with that. I do have a personal page which i never say anything about minding except about my daughter and never used to add parents to that but got one now who i regret adding as she likes to follow me even now child has left and if i go on for sale sites she buys things off me and likes what i like! getting abit creepy now so wont make that mistake again I will keep my personal page just friends ...wibble included of course :)