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Npg1
17-06-2013, 09:03 PM
Hi. I have posted on here before about one of my parents. I deal with the dad alot more than the mum, first time parents to an 8mth old baby. They are quite fussy about baby and I feel everything has to be just so.

She always texts me late in the evening, am I wrong to reply at this time of day?

On Thursday I have x until 3.30 but mum asked me last week if I could have her late so I said yes but my own children have an eye test and I really didnt want to cancel it so said I could take x with me and drop her off home on way home, mum then said she would get someone to pick her up at 3.30 and would this fit? I said no sorry, doesnt give me enough time to pick girls up and get them to appointment.

She then said 'between the two of us when have we had a normal week? :/ ' and x will have to come as that's the only option. I just replied I would cancel appointment.

I feel like she doesnt think I have a life apart from x. I have her 3 days at the mo and in sept they are dropping her down to 1 day and im just really questioning whether this is working.

step11
17-06-2013, 09:18 PM
Some people think we don't have a life. I have the same issue. I would not bother, it will only get worse.

Rick
17-06-2013, 09:22 PM
It sounds like you are bending over backwards for mum and she is dictating your business.

I must admit I have had a problem with one parent always asking to change days and swap days, basically ignoring my fees policy of paying when mindees don't attend. I've caved in, in the past but I have manned up recently because she was starting to take the mick.

Good luck

:group hug:

angeldelight
17-06-2013, 09:27 PM
Hi. I have posted on here before about one of my parents. I deal with the dad alot more than the mum, first time parents to an 8mth old baby. They are quite fussy about baby and I feel everything has to be just so.

She always texts me late in the evening, am I wrong to reply at this time of day?

On Thursday I have x until 3.30 but mum asked me last week if I could have her late so I said yes but my own children have an eye test and I really didnt want to cancel it so said I could take x with me and drop her off home on way home, mum then said she would get someone to pick her up at 3.30 and would this fit? I said no sorry, doesnt give me enough time to pick girls up and get them to appointment.

She then said 'between the two of us when have we had a normal week? :/ ' and x will have to come as that's the only option. I just replied I would cancel appointment.

I feel like she doesnt think I have a life apart from x. I have her 3 days at the mo and in sept they are dropping her down to 1 day and im just really questioning whether this is working.

Sorry bit confused ha ha :laughing:

Do you mean the baby finishes at 3.30 .. she asked if you could have her later but because you had an appointment she decided to ask if someone else could pick up at the usual time of 3.30? But you said no?
Had you changed the babies times and told her in advance that you would not be able to work till your normal time

Sorry it is late and I am tired maybe I am reading this wrong?

Angel xx

Npg1
17-06-2013, 09:30 PM
Thanks for your kind words. I do feel like I bend over backwards for her, I used to worry so much about doing the right thing but now I just think I will do it my way. My other mindees parents are so relaxed. To top it off we are moving in 2 weeks time and this parent has been particularly fussy about drop offs and pick ups when all I have ever done is put the chikd first, we move on the monday and mum still wants me to have her on the tuesday because I go on holiday the following week so I cant possibly take anymkre time off. Arghhh! Sorry!

supermumy
17-06-2013, 09:32 PM
Sorry bit confused ha ha :laughing:

Do you mean the baby finishes at 3.30 .. she asked if you could have her later but because you had an appointment she decided to ask if someone else could pick up at the usual time of 3.30? But you said no?
Had you changed the babies times and told her in advance that you would not be able to work till your normal time

Sorry it is late and I am tired maybe I am reading this wrong?

Angel xx

This is the way I'm reading it too
If you have baby till 3.30 what difference does it make if someone else was To pick up?
:)

Npg1
17-06-2013, 09:33 PM
Haha! No. I normally have baby until 3.30 but she asked me to have her until 5pm so I said yes but my children have an appointment so can take x with me, thats when it got confusing with pick up times and she wanted to pick her up early.

At first she said for me to take her but not let her have an afternoon sleep so she sleeps in car/ buggy. I have now said I will cancel appointment x

angeldelight
17-06-2013, 09:36 PM
Haha! No. I normally have baby until 3.30 but she asked me to have her until 5pm so I said yes but my children have an appointment so can take x with me, thats when it got confusing with pick up times and she wanted to pick her up early.

At first she said for me to take her but not let her have an afternoon sleep so she sleeps in car/ buggy. I have now said I will cancel appointment x

So your appointment was later than 3.30 so you offered to take baby with you so you could have him until 5pm?

Got it now ha ha

Well you offered so I would def not have changed my children's appointment

Angel xx

Npg1
17-06-2013, 09:37 PM
Sorry see what u mean. She asked me last week to have x until 5pm thurs and I said yes then realised my children had an appointment so text her right away but she has only just text me to ask if her mum can pick x up at 3.30 but I said it wouldnt give me enough time and offersd that I could take her or cancel the appointment, it was up to her

angeldelight
17-06-2013, 09:41 PM
Sorry see what u mean. She asked me last week to have x until 5pm thurs and I said yes then realised my children had an appointment so text her right away but she has only just text me to ask if her mum can pick x up at 3.30 but I said it wouldnt give me enough time and offersd that I could take her or cancel the appointment, it was up to her

All confused again now :laughing:

So you had made the appointment thinking you were having the little one till 5 is that right but now she has changed the plan and wants her mom to collect at the original time of 3.30?

I will get there yet ha ha :laughing:

Angel xx

supermumy
17-06-2013, 09:41 PM
Sorry see what u mean. She asked me last week to have x until 5pm thurs and I said yes then realised my children had an appointment so text her right away but she has only just text me to ask if her mum can pick x up at 3.30 but I said it wouldnt give me enough time and offersd that I could take her or cancel the appointment, it was up to her

I'm still confused lol doesnt take alot lol
But if normal pick up time is 3.30 for baby don't understand what prob is as I say I'm blonde haha

angeldelight
17-06-2013, 09:44 PM
So you are not happy because you tried to help and she has changed her plans at short notice

Leaving you to cancel your children's appointment is that right?

I would not have cancelled it

We live and learn though so next time be a bit tougher

Hope your house move goes ok and you have a good holiday , if you book time off in advance she seems the type who will moan but make sure you still have what you need.

Angel xx

Npg1
17-06-2013, 09:45 PM
Haha. Because I need to leave before 3.30 for the appointment (thinking I would have x until later so wouldn't be a prob) so I wouldn't be here at 3.30 for someone to pick her up!!!!

supermumy
17-06-2013, 09:48 PM
Haha. Because I need to leave before 3.30 for the appointment (thinking I would have x until later so wouldn't be a prob) so I wouldn't be here at 3.30 for someone to pick her up!!!!

Okkkkk I get it u booked appt after she said work late till 5 :)
Told ya I'm blonde haha
Well in that case I wouldn't of cancelled appt :)

angeldelight
17-06-2013, 10:11 PM
Okkkkk I get it u booked appt after she said work late till 5 :)
Told ya I'm blonde haha
Well in that case I wouldn't of cancelled appt :)

Both of us blonde but think we got there in the end ha :laughing:

Angel xx

Koala
18-06-2013, 05:16 AM
I think you know the answer.

Bye Bye Baby.

If the situation is making you feel uneasy or is having a negative impact on you or your family, It's not worth the hassle or aggro, life is too short.

Your moving house is an ideal opportunity to end the contract and it will only get worse, save yourself a few grey hairs.

:thumbsup: GOOD LUCK :thumbsup:

mrs robbie williams
18-06-2013, 05:46 AM
Hi. I have posted on here before about one of my parents. I deal with the dad alot more than the mum, first time parents to an 8mth old baby. They are quite fussy about baby and I feel everything has to be just so.

She always texts me late in the evening, am I wrong to reply at this time of day?

On Thursday I have x until 3.30 but mum asked me last week if I could have her late so I said yes but my own children have an eye test and I really didnt want to cancel it so said I could take x with me and drop her off home on way home, mum then said she would get someone to pick her up at 3.30 and would this fit? I said no sorry, doesnt give me enough time to pick girls up and get them to appointment.

She then said 'between the two of us when have we had a normal week? :/ ' and x will have to come as that's the only option. I just replied I would cancel appointment.

I feel like she doesnt think I have a life apart from x. I have her 3 days at the mo and in sept they are dropping her down to 1 day and im just really questioning whether this is working.

Hiya i havnt read any replies but if x is contracted until 330 and she has asked you to have her for extra hours then she must expect you to have appointments to attend, which you have arranged when x has usually gone home. I tell you if it wasnt for parents this job would be lovely :angry::laughing::laughing::laughing::laughing:

Npg1
30-06-2013, 09:03 PM
Hi everyone. Still having problems with this parent. Its stressing me out, had baby 3 days a week and in sept dropping to 1 day a week so thinking is it worth it as I have other children starting.

Nearly every day she texts me to ask me something or make a remark, heating food up, changing nappies, the list goes on.

We move house tomorrow and she wants to pop round tomorrow at 5pm to see the house!!! Doesnt want me to take tuesday off so I have to get everything sorted tomorrow. I said no sorry. She seemed ok but its all the time

Advice please

MessybutHappy
30-06-2013, 10:24 PM
I think you have three choices here.

1. Ignore the silly comments
2. Have a meeting and explain how you feel and what you need changed
3. Serve notice

I think you know #1 isn't an option, so that leaves #2 & #3, you can try #2 & move on to #3 if needs be, or go straight to #3, but only you can decide that.

What ever happens, you have to do something!

Hope the new house is lovely!

Koala
01-07-2013, 04:27 AM
Don't let the bad karma into your new home, it will ruin it for you.

You owe it to yourself to be respected. I had a parent similar and the endless chipping and pointless comments are pathetic and wear you down and I was constantly be on edge even though I new I was doing a very good job.

If you don't believe it will change or if you don't want to carry on - don't - it's your life and your business. :thumbsup:

CLL
01-07-2013, 05:43 AM
Not really worth it for one day a week. Give notice.

yummyripples
01-07-2013, 10:41 AM
I recently had a neurotic parent leave me - got to say that although I lost money I have never felt better. The mum expected me to adore the baby. I got phone calls at weekend and evening to tell me baby has held finger food baby os crawling etc. Hmm weekend? Wait till Monday to tell me.
Then she was telling me how to look after the baby proprly, cooled boiled water not tap water, no cows milk etc etc. She even had me trawling the internet to find details of the activity centre to make sure his toes were touching the floor at the correct position.
Baby cried a lot simply because he was so used to being cuddled (mum denied this and apparently he was only like that with me. ). I spoke to mum about it and she pulled him out.
Bit upset at first because I felt I had failed but now I so happy they have gone x

emma04
01-07-2013, 11:45 AM
I recently had a neurotic parent leave me - got to say that although I lost money I have never felt better. The mum expected me to adore the baby. I got phone calls at weekend and evening to tell me baby has held finger food baby os crawling etc. Hmm weekend? Wait till Monday to tell me.
Then she was telling me how to look after the baby proprly, cooled boiled water not tap water, no cows milk etc etc. She even had me trawling the internet to find details of the activity centre to make sure his toes were touching the floor at the correct position.
Baby cried a lot simply because he was so used to being cuddled (mum denied this and apparently he was only like that with me. ). I spoke to mum about it and she pulled him out.
Bit upset at first because I felt I had failed but now I so happy they have gone x

This sounds like me to an absolute tee!!!

I've just got the notice period to serve and lo is gone along with her neurotic mother who thinks;

'no one can possibly look after her lo as well as she can!!'

The answer to all of her problems were in that sentence!!!

(If you have to work and use childcare, don't read baby books like they're a flipping bible!! Alternatively, read as many books as you like and jack in your job!!)

Minstrel
01-07-2013, 12:04 PM
I think you need ofsted to send you your new certificate before you mind from a new address.