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View Full Version : What i really hate about this job



JCrakers
25-04-2013, 11:40 AM
....is comments that people make. It really annoys me and upsets me, even though I tend not to take them seriously otherwise I'd be down. It's either ignorant people who people who must think I must have no feelings....

Yesterday at the park my 9m old mindee was out the buggy crawling round the grass and another mum who I've spoken to before came over and made a fuss of him. She asked me if he was new to which I replied he's been with me a couple of months. She went on to ask how many days I looked after him. I said 3 at the moment but 4 in May and then 5 in Sept.
She sighed and let out a big groan and screwed up her face as if to say, poor little thing......(5 days a week with you basically). She then went on to say 'ah well, at least he gets to spend time with other children'

Today at toddler group the woman who runs it said 'oh I was speaking to someone the other day who has seen (mindee) at Tuesday toddler group with his mum, and you go too don't you'
I said I did and we continued talking a little about it. Then she said '(mindee) seems to talk a lot more at that group. So and so told me he's always talking but I don't hear him talking so much here'
I was a bit stuck for words so just replied..oh right. But should have actually said 'well, yes, he goes to the Tuesday group with his mum so he's bound to talk more there because when he's with me he has such a crap time he doesn't feel like talking'


I used to be a nanny from when I was 17 for 9yrs and used to look after children from 730-7pm, I used to dress them, give them breakfast and bathed and dressed in pyjamas at the end of the day. Parents used to see the children for 1 hr a day mon-fri and I never had any comments made. In fact if I told people I was a nanny they were impressed and asked questions and actually held a conversation with me.
Now I'm a childminder I get so many comments from people its deflating.

Plus I'm annoyed now because I've eaten two blinkin doughnuts!!!

Koala
25-04-2013, 11:48 AM
Feel for you, vent away......

It happens all the time, some people are just STUPID and what comes out of their mouth is :censored: , don't take it to heart.

oxfordshirecm
25-04-2013, 12:00 PM
I know how u feel- I swear people still think childminders stick the kids in front of the tv all day and drink cups of tea- I wish x

Kirstylob
25-04-2013, 12:06 PM
My younger daughter has recently finished a 2 year Level 3 - A level equivalent so the kids are bright - in Child Development and Education and one of the girls on the course said she wanted to be a childminder because she thought it was easy! My daughter soon put her right!

lauraring1
25-04-2013, 12:09 PM
Just ignor them... Don't let them get to you! I'd like to see half the people who make comments like these do our job :0) hope you enjoyed the doughnuts lol :0)

Sarsar3NCH
25-04-2013, 12:20 PM
I have had similar comments too, one of my favourites is when some parents have had hols with their kids and then come back to me a week/2 weeks later and say his/her speech has really come on over the hols! More like you've now spent enough time with your child to notice how much they can say!!
Also comments like 'I thought you would have given up once your own children were older' like its just a stop gap and not a career ;)

Dilly Daydream
25-04-2013, 12:20 PM
I heard from another friend last week that another mutual friend (who I did consider one to be one of my best friends) won't consider using my services as I have my own child of a similar age to one of hers. Apparently she feels the care I would give her children would be sub standard as I would always put my own child before hers. I hope I don't see said friend anytime soon cos I am so angry.

Why cant people follow - if you have nothing nice to say then don't say anything at all x x

Supernanny86
25-04-2013, 12:50 PM
I hear cm bad mouthing others all the time so it's not just other people. I get grief as I'm a nanny, purely as I don't have my own place yet. I quite often get told when asked bout my job, "oh your a babysitter then!!" NO!! I start at 7:30, I dress, bath, cook, feed, clean, tidy, plan etc etc!! I do so much more that just "babysit"!! I don't have to do planning and follow eyfs but I do, as I put everything in to my job and the children I look after!!

I agree that people shouldn't say anything if they have nothing nice or positive to say!! Especially as they then go on to say, "I couldn't look after other people's children!!" Now I ask you??!!! Really some people need to grow up!! And besides my job never really ends as I'm always planning or thinking of new ideas, places to go, things to buy them etc etc!! It's not just a 9-5 job!!

Kxx

caz3007
25-04-2013, 01:00 PM
I am finding it hard too at the moment. LO is off to nursery for her 15 hours soon and I attended the home visit and mum said 'oh LO doesnt interact very well with other children (she is my only EYFS at the moment) as she doesnt spend any time with them. Ummmm excuse me, we go to two toddler groups and have other friends over with children, so LO does interact and lately I have been writing in the DD all the time that sharing and taking turns and playing alongside is coming along nicely. I did interject and say that I couldnt agree, she has been coming along very well as we do mix quite a bit with other children

phoenix2010
25-04-2013, 01:04 PM
Happens all the time doesnt it ?

Ive had a mindee for 18 months and granny picks him up every day , in January I sent his evaluation and 2 yr check home and mum showed it to granny

next time I saw her she said she was really shocked that I had written all that , I replied that its all part of the EYFS and she said "oh you dont just have them then " She clearly walks into my house with her eyes shut :rolleyes:

Im sure she didnt mean it quite as condescending as it sounded but to be honest Ive had to grow a thick skin becasue people say things all the time that could potentially offend and upset me :D

emma04
25-04-2013, 01:31 PM
I was pushing two of my mindee's in a double pushchair, one was walking alongside it and my dd was walking in front, on our way to school.
I passed two old ladies at the bus stop, one obviously didn't realise how loud she was and after walking passed her she said.... 'see that (meaning me and the children) we're paying for all those kids!):eek::eek::eek:

How I didn't turn around I don't know, but I just kept walking!

I am constantly asked how I manage with so many children.....My NEW response is!.............I lock them in a cupboard for most of it and drink wine...Oh and I have a big stick.....Ever seen Nanny McPhee the Big Bang!
:blush:
They reply with a nervous laugh and never ask again!

Mrs O will appear on my doorstep soon i'm sure with her laptop, ridiculous questions and the odd pathetic rules and regulations................Like making sure I empty the puddles before the children play in the garden!!!:blush:

jackie 7
25-04-2013, 01:50 PM
I heard a man say as I passed by haven't you heard about contraception. Not sure if I should have taken it as a compliment as a 55 year old. The number who ask how I manage is crazy. I tinfoil around and say that as s nanny I cold have had as the parents had. Yes I was asked if I was the babysitter. And they thought if was an easy job! The workman who asked if I drank tea all day and did nothing was not offered a cup of tea. Thick skin is what we need.

merry
25-04-2013, 01:51 PM
I've had a Dad say that he'd taken some time off in school holidays so that his daughter wouldn't be 'stuck in childcare' every day:angry: I was diplomatic and didn't mention that I already knew about it because she'd been complaining to me all week that she'd rather come here cos he does nothing with her.

:)

Dilly Daydream
25-04-2013, 01:53 PM
I was pushing two of my mindee's in a double pushchair, one was walking alongside it and my dd was walking in front, on our way to school.
I passed two old ladies at the bus stop, one obviously didn't realise how loud she was and after walking passed her she said.... 'see that (meaning me and the children) we're paying for all those kids!):eek::eek::eek:

How I didn't turn around I don't know, but I just kept walking!

I am constantly asked how I manage with so many children.....My NEW response is!.............I lock them in a cupboard for most of it and drink wine...Oh and I have a big stick.....Ever seen Nanny McPhee the Big Bang!
:blush:
They reply with a nervous laugh and never ask again!

Mrs O will appear on my doorstep soon i'm sure with her laptop, ridiculous questions and the odd pathetic rules and regulations................Like making sure I empty the puddles before the children play in the garden!!!:blush:

I am pregnant at the mo so you should see their faces when I walk past the bus stop on way to pre school, I have my daughter walking who is 3 and 2 boys aged 2 and 1 in double - then they clock the bump! I am waiting for a comment cos hormones won't allow me not to react ;)

jep
25-04-2013, 02:06 PM
Yep... when i started taking mindee to Nursery everyone was very nice, they presumed i was Granny......when they found out i was a childminder wow what a difference in attitude i couldn't believe it! Now i feel everyone is watching me just waiting for me to slip up on something grrrrrrrrrrrr.

Wheelybug
25-04-2013, 02:15 PM
I was pushing two of my mindee's in a double pushchair, one was walking alongside it and my dd was walking in front, on our way to school.
I passed two old ladies at the bus stop, one obviously didn't realise how loud she was and after walking passed her she said.... 'see that (meaning me and the children) we're paying for all those kids!):eek::eek::eek:

How I didn't turn around I don't know, but I just kept walking!

I am constantly asked how I manage with so many children.....My NEW response is!.............I lock them in a cupboard for most of it and drink wine...Oh and I have a big stick.....Ever seen Nanny McPhee the Big Bang!
:blush:
They reply with a nervous laugh and never ask again!

Mrs O will appear on my doorstep soon i'm sure with her laptop, ridiculous questions and the odd pathetic rules and regulations................Like making sure I empty the puddles before the children play in the garden!!!:blush:

Ha ha, I make comments like this too! I'm sure Ofsted will turn up on my door one day because someone has taken it seriously!

Cathy x.

skatie
25-04-2013, 04:14 PM
Pharmacist once told me whilst handing over my contraceptive pill prescription 'that I clearly needed them' nodding to the pills and looking the kids up and down. Lol, I just walked away laughing!

ozzy10
25-04-2013, 05:20 PM
I had 3 under 2 including my own toddler last summer while heavily pregnant. Really made me laugh people smiled at the boys in pram then spotted bump and smile turned to shock!

Bob
25-04-2013, 06:06 PM
I know how u feel- I swear people still think childminders stick the kids in front of the tv all day and drink cups of tea- I wish x

Ummmmmmm ! You typed that as if it's something wrong. ;)

oxfordshirecm
25-04-2013, 07:16 PM
Haha bob- just jealous that I don't get enough time to go to toilet let alone boil a kettle

lizduncan72
25-04-2013, 07:16 PM
I know how u feel- I swear people still think childminders stick the kids in front of the tv all day and drink cups of tea- I wish x

You mean we shouldn't be doing this???? I'm going to have to totally change what I do now!! lol :)

bunyip
25-04-2013, 07:23 PM
I know how u feel- I swear people still think childminders stick the kids in front of the tv all day and drink cups of tea- I wish x

The reason they think this may be because some CMs I know do exactly that. :(

lubeam
25-04-2013, 07:54 PM
don't shoot me -
as a newbie I was amazed at how much CMs did!! I've always sent mine to day-care because I thought they did it properly where as with a CM it was like bein at home with me.

how very wrong I was ! my SIL is a teacher for FS! & FS2 kids and I no more about EYFS and development matters than her!!! yet because shes a teacher and im (nearly) a CM its all hail her and tut at me!!

im good at politely insulting people so cant wait till ppl start with the comments ! lol

we all need to 'keep our chins up':clapping:

KatieFS
25-04-2013, 08:46 PM
Sadly some cm's give the job a bad rep. Which does not help.
I'd like to hear anyone trying to tell me I'm a babysitter. ****** cheek!

Rachael's stars
26-04-2013, 01:00 AM
Iv had a lady ask me what I did for work when I have a 2 &3 yr old myself I replied im a childminder. ... her responce.... how irresponsible! With children of your own too? I couldn't believe it , what planet do some people live on! Some people are just pig ignorent and dumb!

Optimalstar
26-04-2013, 06:38 AM
I'm a qualified primary school teacher so people think I'm crazy to be childminding when I could be 'teaching'.

I always had a high regard for childminders though before I started childminding. That might be because my sister childminded once over and I had friends who did. I chose to send my daughter to a childminder rather than a nursery. My perception of private nurseries was not good, confirmed more when I then worked in one. With a childminder she got the continuity of one person all the time, went out in the community more and I figured more attention than she might have in a nursery.

winstonian
26-04-2013, 06:44 AM
DH and I omce took 10 on a bus and the drive wouldnt let us pay as he said we deserved a hand but that DH should get the snip! :blush: I tried to explain but he wouldnt listen and then the old couple on the bus wanted to know if we were Catholic!

doris127
26-04-2013, 07:06 AM
When someone comments on the number of children just smile sweetly and say "I know - and they've all got different dads" - the look of shock always makes my day!!

Supernanny86
26-04-2013, 07:10 AM
Haha Doris that's good one!! I'm one of 7 and thats always the first thing they ask!! How rude are some people!! (But yes we are!!)

Kxx :)

toddlers896
26-04-2013, 07:18 AM
When someone comments on the number of children just smile sweetly and say "I know - and they've all got different dads" - the look of shock always makes my day!!

This is funny. A couple of months ago I had three children with me, one was Indian, one was Polish and the other was white English. I had to nip into Tesco before we went to softplay so I popped them all into a trolley and the looks I was getting of people was so funny. I felt like saying they all have different dads. lol

maryp0ppins
26-04-2013, 07:54 AM
When someone comments on the number of children just smile sweetly and say "I know - and they've all got different dads" - the look of shock always makes my day!!

I'm steeling this one, LOVE it. Quite looking forward to someone saying it to me today as its a given ;)

lauraring1
26-04-2013, 09:32 AM
This is funny. A couple of months ago I had three children with me, one was Indian, one was Polish and the other was white English. I had to nip into Tesco before we went to softplay so I popped them all into a trolley and the looks I was getting of people was so funny. I felt like saying they all have different dads. lol

Haha I no this well, same thing happened to me, only I had 2 white English boys and an Indian girl all in a trolly. We had a few strange looks then one rather old lady said to her obvious hard of hearing husband " oh look at her... One of each" lol she obviously forgot that my hearing is heaps better than his... I just turned round, smiled sweetly and walked off :0)

muddybootskids
26-04-2013, 09:40 AM
I LOVE IT!!! Doris so funny gonna use this one day when I have more kids and start to get the looks!!! Lol x

Rubybaby
26-04-2013, 10:25 AM
It is SO aggravating when other people make these types of comment...I've had my fair share of looks and remarks too , and have often been made to feel that I should justify my choice of career when it's implied that i'm ONLY a childminder.

It's hard to feel motivated when you feel undervalued .If they only knew how hard we work (for often long hours) for little financial reward and how seriously we take our jobs!

Ignore the looks and comments...these people don't really have a clue, and remember 'No one can make you feel inferior without your consent'.(Betty Ford)!!
x

Rubybaby
26-04-2013, 10:39 AM
It is SO aggravating when other people make these types of comment...I've had my fair share of looks and remarks too , and have often been made to feel that I should justify my choice of career when it's implied that i'm ONLY a childminder.

It's hard to feel motivated when you feel undervalued .If they only knew how hard we work (for often long hours) for little financial reward and how seriously we take our jobs!

Ignore the looks and comments...these people don't really have a clue, and remember 'No one can make you feel inferior without your consent'.(Betty Ford)!!
x

JCrakers
26-04-2013, 10:40 AM
Thanks for all the responses that cheered me up.

I'm feeling a bit more positive today so onwards and upwards and stuff everyone and their comments ;p

tiredandemotional
26-04-2013, 09:23 PM
I am pregnant at the mo so you should see their faces when I walk past the bus stop on way to pre school, I have my daughter walking who is 3 and 2 boys aged 2 and 1 in double - then they clock the bump! I am waiting for a comment cos hormones won't allow me not to react ;)

I'm pregnant too and TBH really relish the shock I give some people when I go through town with my bump, pushing my one year old mindee with my three year old daughter, six year old son, and five, eight and ten year old mindees! I put on my best 'calm' face and breeze along pretending not to notice all the stares and, like you Helen, I am a hormonal rage waiting to happen if anyone commented! :laughing:

Supernanny86
26-04-2013, 10:23 PM
I do love the looks I get!! I have a medical prob at the mo, I look preggers but am not!!! So.....

Looking preggers + twin 18m boy charges + that I look young = looks of disgust

It's hilarious really!! I might even start telling people that "the next one" hasn't got the same father and they're triplets!! Lol

Kxx

Dilly Daydream
27-04-2013, 07:07 AM
I'm pregnant too and TBH really relish the shock I give some people when I go through town with my bump, pushing my one year old mindee with my three year old daughter, six year old son, and five, eight and ten year old mindees! I put on my best 'calm' face and breeze along pretending not to notice all the stares and, like you Helen, I am a hormonal rage waiting to happen if anyone commented! :laughing:

Haha Susie glad its not just me! How far on are you? My baby is due end of July - I feel huge but people keep saying I am very neat?! Feel like I waddle now instead of walk x

tiredandemotional
27-04-2013, 06:58 PM
Haha Susie glad its not just me! How far on are you? My baby is due end of July - I feel huge but people keep saying I am very neat?! Feel like I waddle now instead of walk x

Hi Helen. I am 28 weeks now, due on 17 July. I have quite a neat bump (some people have only just noticed I'm pregnant with the shedding of winter clothes!) but I am tall so it's all hidden! Mind you, being my third, I feel huge! It's hard work being pregnant and childminding isn't it?! You gave me some good advice regarding maternity leave on my post a while ago - I have applied for MA and am planning on taking the full 39 weeks off - yippee :clapping: x

Allie
27-04-2013, 07:24 PM
My cm friend was asked if her mindee looked like his dad she answered I can't remember....

Supernanny86
27-04-2013, 08:40 PM
My cm friend was asked if her mindee looked like his dad she answered I can't remember....

I might steal this one too!!!
Kxx

Dilly Daydream
27-04-2013, 09:06 PM
Hi Helen. I am 28 weeks now, due on 17 July. I have quite a neat bump (some people have only just noticed I'm pregnant with the shedding of winter clothes!) but I am tall so it's all hidden! Mind you, being my third, I feel huge! It's hard work being pregnant and childminding isn't it?! You gave me some good advice regarding maternity leave on my post a while ago - I have applied for MA and am planning on taking the full 39 weeks off - yippee :clapping: x

Aw glad my advice was helpful Susie, I just refreshed my memory with your thread! When do you finish work hon? I stuck to my guns and am finishing in 3 weeks, it seems to have flown. It is really hard minding whilst pregnant - I am so tired it is untrue. Looking forward to a bit of me time when there are no mindees here and my daughter is at pre school. Means I get some much needed extra sleep so I can be a better mummy to her when she is home.

You must keep in touch our babies are due the same week x