Dog being put down- what to tell mindees

[Pjs]

Sadly we are having to say goodbye to one of our dogs this week as she has a brain tumour. She has been a big part of my childminding. The children love her and one parent chose me because of the dog! ( we used to see the child on our walks before she became my mindee and she loved the dog). All the children I care for are school age. My dilemma is do I tell them she is going to be put down this week and prepare them or do I wait until the deed is done and then tell them she has died when the children arrive the following day? I'm going to text all the parents tonight and tell them so they can be prepared for any questions from their children. Really not sure what is the best way to handle it?

[littletreasures]

When we had to say goodbye to my old boy 2 years ago, I told parents.

2 of the children have been with me for a long time. They had both been with from tiny so knew the dog really well.

J used to cuddle up to the dog in his bed and used Harvey to learn to pull himself up to standing on Harvey.

They knew he was getting old because we used to talk about it. The fact that Harvey had to be helped up and didn't want to go out for walks. When I told Mum what we were having to do she brought the kids round so they could say goodbye. As you can imagine there were lots of years but I'm glad the children knew rather turning up to find Harvey gone.

J still talks a lot about Harvey and we talk about he good times. He hardly mentions the goodbye.

You have to do what's right for you and the children. I'm sorry you have to go throught this.

[Rubybubbles]

so sorry to hear your news my heart goes out to you:(

[Toothfairy]

Sorry to hear your sad news.
When we had to have our Jack Russell put down a few years ago now because of Cancer, we just told the mindee's that she was very sick and had died and gone up to heaven.
They seemed to take it in their stride.

Thinking of you x

[clareelizabeth1]

We just had to do this to one of my dogs. I let all my parents know and asked how they wanted to play it and went with that. My dog was very sudden so didn't have time to do tell before hand but parents all prepared them before they came. It's worth telling them as some parents like to do the heaven thing others don't.

Very sorry you are having to put your doggy down.

[hectors house]

I'm welling up just reading this post, this is the hardest part of being a pet owner and something you never get used to - sending you big hugs :group hug:, we chickened out last time and had our old collie put down the day before we went on holiday so at least we weren't at home to miss her straight away.

I don't know if it is still available but there used to be a book called "goodbye Mog" you may find it in your library under books for sharing.

I would see how the parents want to play it - maybe your lovely old dog could go to the vets for a long time and just stay there and still be too poorly to come home, until the time is right to tell the children that she didn't get better.

[Tazmin68]

When we suddenly had to put our last dog down ( she had a stroke so no warning). I explained that she had died in her sleep. I have a book somewhere which we used with our eldest son about an old dog dying and going to heaven. Cannot remember the name I can sort it out if you wish. It will be 4 years in June. We still have her ashes as we could not bear her being just left and we still have not scattered them. We know where as she loved our holidays in brean and being n the beach. We keep taking her but keep bringing her back. Daft I know but still too early to let her go. As I said to vet why is it we can make these hard decisions for our beloved pets but cannot do the same for adults my nan had Alzheimer's for 15 years and for 7 years had no quality of life and she saw a relative with it herself and she was a nurse and said to my mum shoot me if I ever get like that.

[Tazmin68]

When we suddenly had to put our last dog down ( she had a stroke so no warning). I explained that she had died in her sleep. I have a book somewhere which we used with our eldest son about an old dog dying and going to heaven. Cannot remember the name I can sort it out if you wish. It will be 4 years in June. We still have her ashes as we could not bear her being just left and we still have not scattered them. We know where as she loved our holidays in brean and being n the beach. We keep taking her but keep bringing her back. Daft I know but still too early to let her go. As I said to vet why is it we can make these hard decisions for our beloved pets but cannot do the same for adults my nan had Alzheimer's for 15 years and for 7 years had no quality of life and she saw a relative with it herself and she was a nurse and said to my mum shoot me if I ever get like that.

I was more concerned about hubby as he has ms and was in bits while we were at vets. We had a new pup 5 weeks later. As we only had the one dog the house felt too quiet without her.

[RuthJ]

Oh, how awful for you all :(

I would probably give the parents the opportunity to bring the children to say goodbye.

[caz3007]

So sorry to hear you are going through this, we had to make the same decision a year ago for our old girl, but it was a decision we made overnight and didnt tell our own Ds until he got home from school but we had a couple of hours to say goodbye as a family and I also let me older grown up children know.

My DS was 9 and we looked up online about the rainbow bridge and that really helped him thinking of her frollicking in sunny green fields

[Lorna45]

So very sorry for you all, sorry haven't got any advise as not faced this problem but didn't want to read and run big hugs to you all

[Pjs]

Thanks for your support everyone. I've texted all the parents and they are all going to tell their children what is happening. One parent preferred for me to tell her daughter after the event that the dog had died rather than tell her before that she will be put down. Thankfully the child is part-time so it works out well. The parents have been lovely, at least they will understand if I open the front door on the morning after looking all puffy eyed! Yes I agree that it's a shame we let humans suffer when they are in pain. I have a few childrens books on death, 'badgers parting gifts' is one and 'I will always love you' is another. Will miss my little dog- she has worn most of the dressing up clothes in the kids dressing up box and one of the mindees loved brushing her fur- we said she was like a dog version of Girls World!

[WibbleWobble]

Thanks for your support everyone. I've texted all the parents and they are all going to tell their children what is happening. One parent preferred for me to tell her daughter after the event that the dog had died rather than tell her before that she will be put down. Thankfully the child is part-time so it works out well. The parents have been lovely, at least they will understand if I open the front door on the morning after looking all puffy eyed! Yes I agree that it's a shame we let humans suffer when they are in pain. I have a few childrens books on death, 'badgers parting gifts' is one and 'I will always love you' is another. Will miss my little dog- she has worn most of the dressing up clothes in the kids dressing up box and one of the mindees loved brushing her fur- we said she was like a dog version of Girls World!

oh my love!

She sounds like she has been a good friend to all of you.

I cannot think about when our 18 yr old pussy cats pass on.....i will be hysterical. I can guarantee that!

sending lots of love to you

wibble xxxxxxx