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View Full Version : Mum still not putting seatbelts on - police called.



ceegee
08-03-2013, 08:57 AM
I wrote a post a couple of weeks ago about one of my parents not putting seatbelts on her two little ones aged 18 months and 3 years.

After telling her another 2 times and saying it was my duty to tell the police she's still ignoring me.
Last night I watched her again put the children in the car and drive off.
They are not English and the children hardly speak a word, so although I talk about safety within the car with them, I don't think the 3 year old understands me - mums English is fine but refuses to talk English to the children.
Mum says the 3 year old refuses to wear his belt - he's as good as hold with me - but that's not an excuse and whys she not putting her 18 months old harness on either?

I called the police last night and gave all details including what time she will be driving the kids and picking them up from nursery today ( I only have them twice a week )

I know I've done the right thing, but feel totally terrible that its actually come to me calling the police on her :(

hectors house
08-03-2013, 09:10 AM
Did the police say what they would do - will they go round and see her or write or just try to catch her in the car with the kids not strapped in. I know you must feel terrible for reporting her but just think how you would feel if those children died in an accident not having seatbelts on.:panic:

Zoomie
08-03-2013, 09:15 AM
You have done the right thing. Have you recorded these 'conversations' with mum?

I think I would log it with safeguarding team too, as each time she does it she put the children at risk of significant harm.

Hopefully someone more knowledgeable will come along and confirm whether you need to contact Ofsted too (I think you may)

:group hug::group hug::group hug:

Daisy De
08-03-2013, 09:16 AM
You did the right thing :clapping:

phoenix2010
08-03-2013, 09:18 AM
Good for you and dont feel bad, there is absolutely no excuse for not strapping your kids in , in my opinion its abuse

what is her problem it takes 2 seconds :angry:

hopefully this will make her see sense , but honestly , what kind of parent needs someone to tell them its the right thing to do !!!

Imagine how much worse you would feel if they were injured or killed and you had done nothing :(

caz3007
08-03-2013, 09:19 AM
I would log all the contact you have had re this, in case something more comes of it and you are contacted.

I saw a child about 2 being driven to nursery in a car the other day sitting in the lap of the passenger and the passenger was texting. There was a car seat in the back and I was gobsmacked. Why do people do it? As my son got older and he could do himself up, he used to tell hubby off if he even started the car if he had plugged himself in

ceegee
08-03-2013, 09:24 AM
The police are going to lay stop her tonight near to get house after she leaves mine buy being in their car in a road just before hers and catch her in the act hopefully ( unless an emergency comes in and they can't attend )
They have said they will call me tonight with a progress update and they will keep all my details confidential.
They will make out they were in the area and spotted her with kids in no seatbelts.

The saddest thing of all is that she wears her seatbelt!

Off to call ofsted now to cover my back and make them aware what I've done.

I've not written down conversations with her, but will now write down what I saw and talked about last night with her.
I'm sure ofsted will advise me.

starlight1
08-03-2013, 09:45 AM
Well one on what is difficult but this may well save the childrens lives....Not even crashes emergency stops can be dangerous when not strapped in

vikkit
08-03-2013, 10:57 AM
This is so terrible!! I hope they catch her!! And I hope she loses her license too!!

ziggy
08-03-2013, 11:03 AM
oh poor you, what a horrible situation to be in. Hopefully if police stop her today she will see sense and strap them in. I wouldnt want to report any parent but as mentioned, if children were in an accident you would never forgive yourself

All of my parents strap children in but amazes me how many other children i see not strapped in.

hectors house
08-03-2013, 12:03 PM
Think it is a £60 fine for not ensuring passengers are wearing seatbelt or could be a court appearance and up to £500 fine! (maybe court is for when someone has been injured through not wearing seatbelt)

k1rstie
08-03-2013, 12:39 PM
Think it is a £60 fine for not ensuring passengers are wearing seatbelt or could be a court appearance and up to £500 fine! (maybe court is for when someone has been injured through not wearing seatbelt)

I had a family where the parents were strapped in and the kids were never strapped!

The youngest freaked on the first day of me strapping in, but by the third day, he was fine. He was incredibly strong willed.

I once observed mum strapping him in, (the front seat), after a wriggling battle, he then wiggled down and sat in the footwell with his neck under the seat belt. That was how mum drove home.

They would occasionally have friends kids in the car - again no belts.


About 3 months after they left me, she was stopped by the police, and got a £60 fine for the car seats and points for having no mot on the car!


About 6 months ago, she contacted me about care for a new baby - sadly I had no vacancies on this occasion !


I was very worried about the children

Zoomie
08-03-2013, 12:42 PM
I fell out with my MIL over the use of seatbelts.

She cared for my eldest when he was a baby and I always left a car seat for her to use.

One day, I came home early, to find her just driving out of her yard with DS on the lap of a front passenger. I reached in through the car, and took my DS out of the car. I don't know exactly what was said (it was 14 years ago) but I know I didn't speak to her for 3 months. I never let her look after my children again, where there was any possibilility that they could go in a car with her, and fortunately we moved to the UK a few years later.

She had allsorts of arguments and although it was the law in that country (I can't imagine it wasn't), the police hardly ever enforced it, and it just seemed to be the culture there. Even adults hardly wore seatbelts (myself included when I was younger and before I had children) and once I was stopped and told by the cop 'to wear it every now and then'. :angry:

I hope the police catch her (really think they should be on the next road from yours to minimise the risk) and she should get points on her driver's licence.

Ripeberry
08-03-2013, 12:45 PM
You've absolutely done the right thing. I hope they catch her and throw the book at her. Maybe a fine will make her think.
I once told off one of my parents for letting her then 3yr old start the car. She would give him the keys and he would climb on the passenger seat and turn the engine on. In the meantime she would be trying to strap the little baby brother in the car seat at the back :eek:
She never did it again, well not in front of me anyhow.

k1rstie
08-03-2013, 12:57 PM
You've absolutely done the right thing. I hope they catch her and throw the book at her. Maybe a fine will make her think.
I once told off one of my parents for letting her then 3yr old start the car. She would give him the keys and he would climb on the passenger seat and turn the engine on. In the meantime she would be trying to strap the little baby brother in the car seat at the back :eek:
She never did it again, well not in front of me anyhow.

My step father once accidentally ran my mother over!

She went to pick him up from the station, and get herself stuck in a space! She jumped out to let him get the car out, but as he got in his foot touched the accelerator , and as she had left the engine running, the car moved, causing her to fall.

She spent a few days in hospital, and was thankfully okay apart from loosing her sense of smell!


I now get very jumpy when patents leave the engine running.


On the plus side, my mum now believes that her farts do not stink!!!!!!!

Shamai
08-03-2013, 12:59 PM
Your duty is to safeguard the children which you've already done by explaining to Mum they need to put their seat belts on, even though they are no longer in your care at that time. If she ignores you, you have no choice but to get the police involved, I would have done exactly the same. I cannot understand people who risk their child's lives in this way. Don't feel bad x

nipper
08-03-2013, 01:44 PM
As everyone else has already said, you've done absolutely the right thing. You are in a position to stop this happening again (hopefully). I wonder if she has car insurance as well? Maybe the police will also check her driving documents if they manage to catch up with her.

The Juggler
08-03-2013, 01:50 PM
its a hard thing and a horrible thing to have to do hon but not worse than a car crash with the kids in the car with no belts and you feeling awful you hadn't said anything :panic:

totally behind you.

cathtee
08-03-2013, 07:42 PM
I think you have done the right thing, there is nothing worse than seeing a child not strapped in a car seat or seat belt, and then to see
the parent strapped in safe is so infuriating:angry: Hope she gets the book thrown at her.

RuthJ
08-03-2013, 07:47 PM
You've absolutely done the right thing - well done. x

migimoo
08-03-2013, 07:47 PM
Well done for making this hard decision.

My BIL never uses a seatbelt and would never strap his son in....he was messing about with the door when he was 5 or 6 and as his dad went around a bend flew out of the door at 20-30mph-luckily he only suffered cuts and bruises but even after that BIL wouldn't strap him in.:panic:

If my kids are in his car he tells them not to bother but they know better....some people are just plain thick!!

flashers
08-03-2013, 07:49 PM
Well done - Totally the right thing. Some people, honestly makes me so mad

wendywu
08-03-2013, 08:38 PM
It was the only course of action you could take really, so well done for standing up for what is right :thumbsup:

blue bear
08-03-2013, 08:57 PM
Well done,much better to get pulled over by the police and learn her lesson than have an accident and live the rest of her life with regrets.

alex1604
09-03-2013, 05:27 PM
Have you heard anything? Did they stop her? Well done for being brave, I cannot understand why anyone, let alone a mother would risk a child's life!

ceegee
11-03-2013, 11:14 AM
She was caught - police called me yesterday morning.
They stopped her 2 roads away from her home and witnessed older child jumping up and down between front and back seat with their own eyes, exactly like I had described.
Fine and points and a stern telling off given on the spot and both children unbuckled.
They said she didn't even seem remorseful and just accepted her fines.
They will be keeping an eye on her and have asked me to dial 999 if I suspect lack of seatbelts again.

Wonder if she will tell me about it at all?

Toothfairy
11-03-2013, 11:23 AM
I'm glad they caught her. I hope for the childrens sake she takes note now and straps them in.
Well done you :thumbsup:

Christi
11-03-2013, 11:26 AM
I hope she does take it in :(

Ripeberry
11-03-2013, 11:36 AM
If she carries on doing it then she is either mad or bad! :mad: