Mindee cries unless tv is on

[skatie]

More specifically she cries unless Peppa Pig or Mickey Mouse is on. Even if an advert comes on or someone gets in front of the tv it sends her into another fit of crying. I'm at a loss with what to do, I only have her for 7 hours one day a week but because mum works from home she has the tv on constantly. I've tried banning the tv but can't engage her in playing with anything else, after 45 minutes of very high pitched, hysterical crying I cave and put the tv on and the crying is on and off throughout the day. It's not fair on her or my LO but I don't feel like I am being paid to sit her in front of the TV. She is 22 months and doesn't talk at all, so communication can be difficult as 95% of the time I don't even get a nod or shake of the head in response to my questions not even eye contact sometimes. She is also not confident in social environments, she cries when we go to toddler groups etc, cries if someone comes to visit and cries if she sees the front door. She is my first mindee and I've had her since September, I feel that I should help her to become more confident and less dependant on the tv etc. mum is going to take her to speech and language drop in and will try to limit the TV to see if that helps. Just wondered if anyone else has experienced anything similar and what you did to resolve the attachment. Peppa Pig/ Mickey Mouse is clearly her 'safety blanket' but how do I show her that there is a much more interesting world beyond that box?

[sarah707]

Oh dear she wouldn't like it here then - we don't watch tv at all during the day we are far too busy.

I think you need to speak to mum - if your observations show that she is behind in lots of areas of learning and development then steps need to be taken urgently to support her.

Does she have any other comfort items? Maybe a soft Peppa Pig to hold?

xx

[jillplum]

Dont think she would like my place either. Can only siggest Peppa or mickey books and toys, maybe a radio on as background music?

[blue bear]

What is she like outside, I had one who had been permantly baby sat by the tv at home and really didn't know what to do without it. But outside although took lots of support she would engage more and was less fixated on getting the tv on (not that mine is ever on).
I found because my garden was full of interesting things to investigate that she didn't really have anywhere else she slowly but surely came out of her shell, she liked a wooly blanket to hold which gave her confidence. It took along time to get her comfy at groups with her permantly on my knee but I took it very slowly with short visits to quieter groups and we got there.

[zippy]

She'd be spending a lot of time wailing at mine then lol, stick to your guns they'll soon give up, earplugs are good too:laughing:

[migimoo]

Oh dear-I had one like this,he would bang and shake the TV screaming because I wouldn't put it on....he also has no speech-makes you think the two must be linked doesn't it?

I stuck to my guns and after a few months he showed some interest in what was going on around him but is now referred to our local children's centre for speech,play,social and behaviour delays as he still doesn't play as such so you may find yourself in the same boat no matter what you try.

The other day I asked mum if I could have him to go to a special group and her reply was basically-no thanks he's happy watching cbeebies today....all day.

Hopefully your mum will be more responsive-good luck!

[angeldelight]

It sounds like she is used to a lot of tv at home

First I would speak to mom and explain that you are trying to discourage it a little and could she support you and do the same at home maybe

I would leave the tv on in the background for the first hour she arrives, it sounds like it is her comfort zone

I would then distract her, do you have any musical instruments, or a saucepan and wooden spoon, use the tv programme and make some noise to some of the songs or music that is on

Then switch the tv off

Make lots of noise so she does not notice..... hide a toy, encourage her to help you find it

Most of all you need to distract her so she does not get upset and does not stress you out in the meantime

Does she like playing with gloop etc, could you take her into another room on and have a cd with pepper pig on or something

You will soon get her into the habit of knowing she is going to be doing new things

Good luck let us know how it goes

Angel xx

[Porridge]

I would really encourage getting outside, not necessarily to groups, but maybe to the park, playground, feeding the ducks, going to see the fish at the pet shop; anything that might help her find the world outside the living room/tv. We rarely have tv on, but it does seem that at this age, as soon as they notice the tv, it's an obsession the minute they go in the house...

[chriss]

if the reason for the childs behaviour is that she is watching the TV too much, then this is the saddest post I have read. And I would put a cover over my TV and say it doesn't work. She will get used to the idea eventualy and hopefully start to explore a bit more. Am shocked to be honest :(:(

[lynncjt]

Oh poor little kiddie. She would struggle here as I don't have a TV and make that clear to parents when they visit. Do watch a few DVD's but it's the exception.

[vikkit]

Don't know whether anyone has put this yet but my own son is the same age and also loves peppa and mickey. The only thing i can suggest is buying some peppa toys or mickey - there are loads out there and also the summer is coming up so going outside a lot may distract from the fact the TV isn't on.
I would continue to take her to play groups but maybe only go in for 30 mins and build it up if she's really distressed.
Is there any minders in your area who you talk to who could maybe come round when she's there so she gets used to people visiting and who may possibly offer some other advice as they will see first hand the situation??

[skatie]

Thanks for all your advice. I will try next week to be out doors as much as possible during the day and have been looking for Peppa pig/ Mickey Mouse resources to buy. I would tell her that the TV is broken except that I need it as a back up ie when it gets to the point where I can't bear the hysterical crying any longer! As she understand everything I say I don't want her to think I am a liar when it miraculously starts working again lol! I have resorted to ear plugs on one previous occasion but its not very fair on my LO - what a terrible situation... Saw mum last night and after 1 week of limited TV she has started to say 2 words, yes and thank you. Will persevere as she is a sweet little thing when she isn't crying.

[Porridge]

We have been known to have the odd 'power cut'. Surprising how convenient they can b sometimes!!

[vickylou]

I have a 3yr old who isn't allowed to watch tele at home!!! I normally put it on for an hour in the morning after she gets home from nursery, for a child who doesn't watch tele she knows all the songs on cbeebies, anyway she has a right strop when I turn it off, it regularly goes off before the hour is up as around that time the sky box goes on standby, this works to my advantage and say oh dear tele broke again! Oh well maybe it will be back on tonight when all the schoolies get home!! At the moment I can get away with it as she can't read the notification that pops up saying the sky box is about to go on standby! Fingers crossed she won't be a quick learner!!!

[jillplum]

Funny how children who supposedly dont watch tv know all the characters and can sing the them tunes etc :D I often lose the remote control so cant put the tv on.

[mushpea]

using the tv as a back up for when you cant stand the crying anymore isnt going to help either of you because she will just cry and scream untill you give in as she knows thats what will happen, I suggest you go cold turky wiht the tv and do not give in at all, prehaps the tape player with some cbbies tunes on in the back ground would be comforting to her as its familiar when you are home.
as others have said i would get out during the day , go for a nice walk, feed the ducks, go to the park, dosent matter if its not summer, I hate that people think you cant be outside this time of year we can have some lovely sunny days and some yucky grey days but we go outside what ever and it really perks the children and me up, grumpy child inside can turn in to a happy child outside.
could you prehaps print off some peppa pictures to colour and maybe laminate them so she can play with them, make a peppa car out of boxes.
I would talk to mum about how she screams when there is no tv and that you dont feel your job is to sit her in front of it, once she is away from the tv observe her and see if you still have the same developmental concerns, if you do then again talk to mum about the concerns.
i feel sorry for her because if shes sat in front of the tv all day she is gonna really struggle with speach, concentration, movement, and social skills

[Zoomie]

I would go cold turkey with the tv as well.

Will probably be hell, but habits are formed and broken in 3 days, so it will definitely start to get better after a few days.

You really need to get mom on board too.

Lots of hugs and ear plugs

[partyrings]

I am going through the same thing at this moment in time. Parents are aware and even told me what to put on to calm the child down with!!! They even say that I can continue to work around their child. I feel totally trapped and feel really guilty for the other children within the setting. I am trying to break the cycle but there is only so much screaming that the other children/myself can take.

[skatie]

First day since posting this thread that we have had NO TEARS at all, not even when she fell on the school run and grazed her hand. Aww! I am so happy that we have got to this stage and she has the cutest, cheekiest little character. She is still not talking but we have come on in leaps and bounds in other areas, she is much more sociable and talks to other children (in her own little way), loves toddler group and has started enjoying painting ( didn't like getting her hands messy so we have adopted the paint in plastic sleeve). Thanks so much for your advice and wisdom, it all worked!

[RuthJ]

Well done!:clapping: that was so lovely to read :)

[Angela234]

No TV here, can you find any mickey mouse/pepper pig colouring pages, puzzles, print off pictures for cutting and sticking with or laminate pictures maybe hide them for them to find. to put on walls or different sizes to look at big and small, go to the library and get some books.