Teaching personal hygiene

[Cottonsocks]

I have a family of boys I care for (3) who obviously don't brush their hair or get washed in the morning before coming here for school. They look like they're brushing their teeth as they're wearing most of it & yet all 3 have very smelly breath. We've done many activities, games & discussions that have given me the opportunity to talk about what we do in the mornings (toilet, washing hands, getting washed, brushing teeth & hair) & yet day after day they look like they've been dragged through a hedge backwards. I know every family is different, but also feel very strongly that teaching children the importance of personal hygiene is a vital part of growing up. I know that Mum gets a shower every morning! I've tried joking to Mum that the children mentioned they don't brush their hair, hahaha, how funny are they? I thought this might make her realise I'd noticed & shame her into it, but to no avail! One of the LOs hadn't wiped his bottom properly at school one day & was a bit itchy. He was also itchy the next day.... and the next day. I mentioned to Mum that he was itchy & that he hadn't wiped himself properly 3 days before, so he either hadn't washed his bottom properly or could have worms & to check him please. Thought this might make her think, but to no avail! I've since suggested to the children (7, 5 & 3) that they need to remember to brush their hair in the mornings. The 7 year old said that they've asked Mum if they can get washed & brush their hair, but she's said (apparently) that they're not allowed or they'll leave the house late.
I'm at a loss what to do. I know that Mum takes offence at anything said very easily which is why I've tried to say everything jokingly, but she just doesn't get it.
Am I being ridiculous that this bothers me?

[jillplum]

I think I would give the kids the opportunity to wash and brush hair etc at my house when they arrive. Keep separate brushes and cloths etc. They need to learn to take care of themselves even if Mum is not supportive.

[nipper]

That's quite sad really, but I agree with jillplum. Would it be possible to get some cheap flannelscombs/brushes/tooth brushes and toothpaste to keep at yours? Do you mention it to mum though or not?:panic:

Now i've re-read that list, my neglect alarm is going off!

Mind you, I hate it when my dd age 6 tries to leave the house in the morning with pillow hair!

[Cottonsocks]

They already get their hair & teeth brushed here occasionally. Problem is, first thing in the morning we have 12 mindees & are doing breakfasts & getting ready to take 8 of them to school. Mum is very happy for me to do everything (really not meaning to sound catty) & I really think SHE should take some responsibility. I also have only been told they're not allowed to wash & brush. A child could say anything!

[nipper]

I would explain to her exactly from that viewpoint then. Tell her it's hard enough to get everyone ready for school, without having to make sure that her three are presentable. Do you do newsletters, maybe mention it in that?
Good luck.

[Cottonsocks]

It's so hard. She's not aware I try & make them presentable. I just know from past experiences that if I do something to help, she expects it all the time & thinks of it as one less thing for her to do.

[nipper]

Hmmm, makes you wonder why some people bother having children, doesn't it?

[Cottonsocks]

Oh yes! They're gorgeous children. It's just such a difficult subject to approach Mum about...!