struggling to engage clever 2 year old

[Memina]

Hello wonder if anyone has any suggestions how I can engage a very smart 2 yeae old. She is fully potty trained and has a super extensive vocabulary. However she doesnt seem to have any social skills at all. Doesn't interact well with other children will alway choose to sit out away from the group.

I havent quite cracked what shes into and what will keep her engaged for any period. Any ideas would be much aprreciated.

Thanks
M

[The Juggler]

is she doing anything whilst away from teh group. My 2 x 3 just turning 4 year olds are currently VERY into mark making and spend hours drawing and writing. If she is very advanced she might prefer to do this or maybe she wants to be outdoors?

I think here is where parent partnership really comes into play. I would sit them down and say she's obv. very bright and you want to plan some stimulating activities for her and what kind of things does she do at home.

Sorry if you have already tried that option. Maybe look at the toy resource centre near to you and see what activities they have for pre-schoolers things like balancing/scales which take lots of concentration.

However, very bright children who are less social usually need lots of support to get engaged in more imaginary play so I would still try to encourage the role and smallworld play. and when she is playing engaged with something and other children try to talk to her/play with her encourage her to tell them what she is doing, rather than get cross with them disturbing her, to develop her social skills. :thumbsup:

[nipper]

I would ask the parent to jot down some ideas as to what she likes at home.

Some ideas:
Play dough
Sticking with glue sticks - have a variety of different materials such as sequins, tissue paper (get them to tear their own), card shapes
Drawing
Gloop (my favourite)
Baking
Musical instruments
Water play

As many different ideas set out at her level (on a small table if you have one) so she can just delve in on her own.

How often are you having her and for how long?

[rosebud]

Hello wonder if anyone has any suggestions how I can engage a very smart 2 yeae old. She is fully potty trained and has a super extensive vocabulary. However she doesnt seem to have any social skills at all. Doesn't interact well with other children will alway choose to sit out away from the group.

I havent quite cracked what shes into and what will keep her engaged for any period. Any ideas would be much aprreciated.

Thanks
M

I wouldn't expect many social skills at 2 and think its ok for them to not be playing "with" other children at this age. She may prefer the company of older children if her speech and understanding is good as she will get more back from them than children of her own age. I would just be observing her to try and work out what her interests are (and asking parents as previously suggested) so that you can try to provide things she wants to do. Have you tried baking? I have never had one that doesn't want to bake and then they have to be part of the group.

[sarah707]

She is quite young for playing with - I'd be looking for 'alongside' play though...

Maybe she isn't sure how to join in and if you sit with the children and play alongside them she will watch and learn over time.

I'd ask parents as well as already suggested - I was struggling with one of mine a while ago and mum told me he spent all his time at home on the Wii... well that explained that one then! :laughing:

Hth :D

[Memina]

I've mentioned it to parents before and they said that she's very much like this at home. Flitters from room to room not quite sure of what to do with herself.

I agree she is very frustrated when trying to talk to other children. My daughter has started preschool so is no longer at home in the mornings ap doesn't have anyone to play with who will engahe with her.

[blue bear]

Do you go to any groups or can you meet up with another minder or friend who has a similar developmentally similar child.
I often find the ones who are bright so young are less socialised as parents spend a lot of time giving one to one and the child has not naturally learned to play by itself, which is a skill she needs to master before she can engage with others.

I'd be playing with her but then drifting away from the game fir e.g. begin with showing lots of interest and then sat next to but not constantly talking and engaging but supporting her to keep her interest, them sitting a bit away, trying to build her confidence to engage and play by herself. She needs confidence and belief in her own skills to become really engaged and stick with something for a period of time. Aim for 30 seconds at an activity and build time from there.

Once she can self engage she will then start playing alongside and eventually when she is developmentally ready she will play with, but she is still young for that just yet.

[LauraS]

I have a child who was very much like this when she started (although a bit older at 3), extremely bright but didn't 'play' or engage imaginatively. I assumed she didnt have much imagination at first:o, but over time it's become apparent that she does - it has just needed encouragement, modelling imaginative play and sneaky retreat, as suggested by Blue Bear :D. She is also a very verbal child, so her imagination is really fired by talking, making up stories and elaborating on them between us, etc rather than role play etc. She enjoys making up stories and dictating them, making them into storybooks using paper and colours and stapler etc.

I have offered her lots of little things to try to try and interest her and the one thats really stuck is photography. Probably sounds a bit loopy but I let her use my SLR camera (my baby that not even DH uses :o) and she loves it. She takes pictures of things that interest her and has enjoyed learning how to use it properly, on Wednesday she was setting it up using the timer and then taking pictures of herself/us. She has also used it for her phonics (we have a phonics scrapbook and she takes pics of things for each letter) and for making comic book style stories, taking us/small world/etc indoors and out of the house and setting up scenes to make her stories, sticking them in and writing the words underneath until she has a story. Also using long exposure in a dark room to 'paint with light' and we're going to try some stop-frame animation. So she's used that interest to engage in other areas, literacy, imaginative play etc. I'd keep trying and encouraging til you find something that suits her.

I'd also try offering activities which are a bit beyond her years to see if they might challenge her, see if things like exploring rhyme, phonics, more challenging art or early maths skills might interest her, she might surprise you. She could be bored and lacking challenge. Busy bag-type activities might also suit her as she could self-select something to so, they can be short lived if she is easily bored and you can vary the level of challenge. Like these:
Duplo Blocks Counting & Tower Matching Busy Bag - All Our Days (http://allourdays.com/2012/10/duplo-blocks-counting-tower-matching-busy-bag.html)
Butterfly Symmetry Busy Bag: 31 Days of Busy Bags & Quiet Time Activities (http://allourdays.com/2012/10/butterfly-symmetry-busy-bag.html)
Mickey Mouse Color Matching & Memory Game Busy Bag - All Our Days (http://allourdays.com/2012/10/mickey-mouse-color-matching-memory-game-busy-bag.html)
Busy Bags! (http://blog.tpet.co.uk/posts/christina/busy-bags/)


BTW I wouldn't worry about her not playing with others, especially at only 2.