View Full Version : Have you ever been on holiday with another family? Pros and cons?

10-08-2012, 04:55 PM
We are considering renting a villa with another couple and their DD next Summer. Our DDs are the same age and get on well. The other family approached us and hubby is very keen and has already started looking at villas. I'm more hesitant. Some aspects will be great, I know, but I do love our holidays as a family and I'm not the social butterfly that he is. I would prefer a hotel as then we can all escape each other if we need to and we won't have to decide who gets which room, who does the cooking tonight (I'm really rubbish at cooking, so another fear) etc.

Any tips for holidaying with another family? x

10-08-2012, 04:58 PM
personally I would hate every minute of it
I am a pretty social person - but not 'living with others' like that.

for many years - going quadding you live on top of people and we used to holiday/race over in france with a stack of people - I enjoyed it - so so but at least I had my own caravan to retreat to..

10-08-2012, 04:59 PM
I don't fancy it personally so can't offer tips sorry - I just wouldn't do it, I like our family time and the kids always make friends wherever we go too! They won't get on for the whole time if always together and it could get awkward - what if they drink like fish every night and you don't or the other way round? What if they want to laze around the pool all the time and you want to go out and end up babysitting the whole time? hopefully others will have some more insight- how well do you know them?

Jen x

10-08-2012, 05:10 PM
We went camping with another couple last year and enjoyed it. But we are good friends and are still good friends.

10-08-2012, 05:12 PM
I have never been away with another family, just my brother and his family and that was fine, but I don't think I could go with another family, I do like to "be myself":)

10-08-2012, 05:15 PM
We used to go on holiday with my sister & her family. It had it's pros & cons.

We first went before DH & I had children & found we spent a lot of the time looking after my niece. If we went out anywhere together, we'd be the ones chasing after her as they wanted a break! When we all had children it was better, but could get difficult as we had different expectations about behaviour etc.

On the plus side, BIL did all the cooking! And at night it was lovely when we all sat having a drink, playing board games or cards & generally having a good laugh.

10-08-2012, 05:19 PM
my big one would be to make it clear you will be wanting time alone with just your family sometimes (if you do that is) we went on holiday with friends and she wanted to spend all her time with us, when we tried to break free and do stuff I knew she wouldnt want to he decided he would love to join us. From what I remember this was really our own real issue x

10-08-2012, 06:04 PM
I have done it on several occasions, but certainly wouldnt share accommodation. Did that once and it was a disaster. Have been before in hotels, self catering and caravans in this country, where we have stayed in close proximity but had our own space.

Think about it carefully

10-08-2012, 06:29 PM
I'm really glad you all seem to know where I'm coming from as hubby and this other couple are so up for it! I don't want to be paranoid about DD misbehaving, or be aroung their DD if she misbehaves. Bit paranoid in my swimming costume in front of others too :blush:

blue bear
10-08-2012, 06:40 PM
I find having to host families in my day to day work just means I want to get away from it and truly be myself on holiday, I really wouldn't want to be on best behaviour with another family. I once went on holiday with my sister, she really got the hump when we wanted to do things by ourselves.

10-08-2012, 06:52 PM
I have a large family, we love each other dearly, we've been away for long weekends together (20+ tent camping) it was great fun, but even we set ground rules regarding our own children, personal space - always needed imo even at home!
We're considering doing a villa holiday together, and have been for the last 3 years :laughing:
It can test the strongest of relationships, but it can also make things even stronger

10-08-2012, 08:45 PM
We go with 16 to a caravan park for a weekend, this is close family. We all have our own caravans to escape to and we spend a lot of time together too, its just right for us

10-08-2012, 08:57 PM
Hmm I'm really anti-social and like my own space, don't like visitors or anything - (why I'm a childminder who has parents trooping into my house all the time I have no idea!)
I went on holiday with my mum for her birthday and my 2 brothers and their partners. It was ok but things like shopping, cooking, cleaning up, where we went for the day, what we watched on tv, even the discipline of my kids by others - all a bit tense. nice to escape to our own room!
I think a sit down to discuss your concerns - like are you going to spend every waking moment together or are you going to do your own thing each day and meet up in the evenings or half and half. Just need to know where you stand so you can think about whether its for you or not!

10-08-2012, 10:29 PM
When my children were young we always used to go on holiday with either friends, my parents or sister-in-law and her family. Im not naturally a very outgoing or sociable person but it always worked really well and I loved it, we never had a falling out with anyone and all had a fabulous fun time. I really miss it now.

11-08-2012, 12:16 AM
i'm not great at sharing my personnal space BUT we went twice for a 4 days break with dh best ffriend and his family. first in a house with 1child each, then in caravan with 2 children each and it was really fun.

we agreed that we would do most things together but needed a moment own space as well. it worked well.
...despise the fact that they had a teething child each time:( short night for me as hubby slept through it all!:D

rented an massice villa in france with my family 2sisters (1with partner) my younger brother, my older brother his wife and 3 children, my dad and his wife and us 4! we had the BEST TIME EVER!!!! the house was amazing LOADS of space, games and stuff, sea was 10min walk away... stepmum and sister in law cooked, i did general cleaning and bathrooms, men look after each other LOL younger sis kept kids entertained, I was table coordinator and bath coordinator for kids LOL it was a fantastic week. there was so many of us no time to get bored :thumbsup:

just make sure you agree a few basic : ie you're a childminder who won't childmind :D offer each other a night babysitting agree on personnal time.... you don't have to do everything together!

good luck:thumbsup:

PS: you'll never know until you try. it sounded to me like hell but i enjoyed it

11-08-2012, 07:40 AM
i wouldn't do it. sorry but we went on holiday with my hubbys ex wife and kids (and grandchild) a few times in the same hotel and that was strained enough. we all get on like a house on fire but i found them to be very selfish on holiday and after a couple of days of being the one to get the drinks in all the time, or let them go first in the lift etc I decided to treat them like i was being treated and took a little bit too - but i didn't like it. I would go insane if the other family never bothered to wash up, for eg - you can't TELL them to do it because its their right to live how they want to, but on the other hand if you are a tidy person it would grate on your nerves.
You can get places that are say 1 villa but seperated on 2 levels each with their own self contained facilities, that might be better for you.

11-08-2012, 09:02 AM
We've done it with family and friends and absolutely love it but always agree a few ground rules. It sounds a bit rigid but honestly can make the difference between a great holiday and losing a friend!! Some suggestions:

Stick to a week at least the first time
Get your own hire car so you're not tied to each other for outtings and agree that you can do your own thing (we like at least one day on the beach on our own)
Agree to 1 night each babysitting
Put a decent sum of money into a kitty (we usally do £100 per week per family) and agree to share cost of shopping equally. Don't let the fact that you just like a slice of toast for breakfast & your mate wants a full english everyday put a dampner on things as it usually evens out on the end. If you have any money left use it for a meal out on the last night. If you're got a child in nappies or particularly expensive tastes in something then buy it separately
Agree who is doing what in advance - we usually do agree one couple does breakfast (preparing, clearing etc) & one does lunch whilst the other watches the children.Agree to rota evening meals (one cooks, one clear) - even if you're crap at cooking presumably you can rustle up a spag bol or better still get the DHs to do BBQ

Have fun :D

11-08-2012, 09:22 AM
We did it once when our 2 were 2years and 1year old, they had a 4 yearold daughter at the time. Vowed never again as it did upset our friendship. I was left looking after their daughter and our own 2 most of the time including tidying up the villa and cooking and cleaning. Needles to say we have never done it again.

We did go camping last year with my brother and sis-inlaw with neice and its was fine as we all had our own space and only met up if we were doing something

11-08-2012, 09:40 AM
We went on holiday with my family. 16 of us, rented cottage in Wales. Whilst it was nice in some respects others were a nightmare and I found we all just became fragmented and argued about silly things. I've never been away with another family since having my own children but we have been asked to next year (hubbys family) we'll see!

11-08-2012, 10:02 AM
Suppose its a bit different if you are staying at someone else's house abroad. We've been to friends in South Africa but they had an enormous 5 bedroomed house, they had the top floor and we had the bedrooms downstairs (house on a steep hill). It was a bit awkward as our kids wanted to stay up late but it was still a normal working week for them and their kids had to go to school in the morning...7am start! but they would be home by 1pm as the afternoons were too hot for school. We would then spend the rest of the day with the mum and kids going to the beach whilst dad was at work.
But most of the time we spent our time doing our own thing and then meeting up in the evening and going out for meals instead.
Worked well for us.
Another time we spent time with some friends in the South of France and our youngest had a nightmare in the middle of the night and somehow managed to lock our door whilst trying to get back in. So the house was wide awake by 3am!
That was a bit awkward :littleangel:
But I would only stay with people I knew very well.

11-08-2012, 11:57 AM
We have gone camping with our friends and their DD who is age is between my DSs for many years. the first time we all shared a tent (three bedrooms). Now the children are grown up we still go away as two couples, sometimes camping or sometimes in hotel weekend breaks. We still have seperate hols/breaks too.

Have been on hols with my sister and her family a couple of times but that was not quite so relaxing as my DH and BIL get on but don't have many shared interests. So I think it all depends on the mix of people how well you will rub along together.