View Full Version : Not enjoying the holidays at all

07-08-2012, 07:30 AM
Im having a bad time with the summer hols. I had two weeks off at the beginning so I've got no need to complain :rolleyes:

But what I'm really struggling with is I don't have a car for work so I'm limited to walking distances. First week back I had a 5yr old and 2yr old siblings and we just pottered around at local park, crafts and played.
This week is turning out to be the same but with two 8yr olds also.

What I'm really hating is that my own two children who are 10 and 13 are just sitting around all day. DS is in his room all day playing on Xbox chatting with mates and dd stays in her pjs most days. The odd day she will go out with friends. I'm hating the fact that I can't do anything with my own children because I'm working. Dd will join in with activities if she likes the look of them and will play with the older mindees but DS is too old to be interested. Hes getting up at lunchtime, having his breakfast at around 2pm etc etc.

When my own two children are out with friends the relief that lifts from me is immense. The stress lifts because I know they are 'doing something'
We do a lot at weekends to compensate for it. DS cycles with dh and dd horse rides and is joining an athletics group soon so they are not constantly sat on their bums.

I'm feeling guilty because the mindees are having fun here but my own two kids are wasting their holidays sat about :(

07-08-2012, 07:42 AM
What would you be doing with your two? Can you not go a bit further if you have 2 8yr olds and your two helping? That is what I used to do when my two were that age. I didn't have a car then and we used the bus and train to get to museums or a different park etc.

07-08-2012, 07:51 AM
I know exactly what you mean - I feel my kids have been left to their own devices so far this holiday. We go away for 2 weeks soon so that will be better. I've been taking them out but it's hard finding things to do with all ages.
On the plus side though, I have a friend who works everyday and her children (9 and 6) go to holiday clubs, sports clubs, grandparents and friends - a different place everyday while their mum works - it sounds good but all her children want to do is stay at home relaxing and pottering around in their own environment and not getting dressed until lunch time.

07-08-2012, 08:13 AM
jcrackers I know its difficult but I would try not to beat yourself up about it, it is the same for me, however my kids like the fact that for 6 weeks they can get up late, laze around in pj's and do nothin if they wish. From a child's point of view termtime they have to folow a strict schedule and have little say in their own lives, whereas in the holidays they can make up their own minds iyswim? sending you big hugsxxxxx

07-08-2012, 08:31 AM
Im not working these holidays and alot of the time we are spending it lazing around. Have you considered that your children are enjoying it. You have not said that they are complaining.

I refuse to spend all my waking time organising stuff for my children to do they have routine for 39 weeks of the year we can chill for the other 13 :thumbsup:

07-08-2012, 09:02 AM
Thanks everyone.
Thinking about it, My kids seem happy actually. Its me that has a problem with it :laughing:

I always think we have to be 'doing something'. At weekends I'm always needing to do something with them and can't relax until we have done something. I know I need to relax more. My DH always says I need to slow down a bit as he's the opposite to me and likes to do nothing.
I'm the same with work. I do loads with the kids and then feel bad when parents come because we haven't done much.
If I have a lazy day with the mindees I feel so bad when parents ask what we've done. I feel I have to be 'doing something' all the time, producing something to take home to show that we've been doing something

I think theres so much pressure on us as parents nowadays to do things with our children but when I grew up in the 80's I just did my own thing half the time. Spent a lot of my time at my grandma's while Mum was working just playing on my own cos I was an only child until I was 10.

Feeling a bit better now Ive aired my concerns :D:D

07-08-2012, 11:19 AM
I do empathise with you as I am getting bored with the same old haunts this holiday. I think the rubbish weather doesn't help, does it?
But kids need to spend time doing nothing - a lot don't get enough of it these days. It helps you develop creativity, resourcefulness and self-management. Also teenagers need time to relax and slob about as they are going through so much in terms of physical and emotional development that their bodies need more rest - just like early pregnancy.
Sounds like your kids do lots of fun family stuff at the weekend, and at least they've got you and others around if they needed to talk, or felt lonely - the perfect life really

07-08-2012, 01:07 PM
im sure glad i read these responses,
Why do we put this pressure on ourselves, feeling like we have got to be doing something everyday. My kids arent complaining and we are having fun chilling out at home making the most of the weather creating dens in the garden with windbreaks, races, theyre fine stop worrying.
A childminder friend of mine actually cant stand being at home, she is out 6+hours a day creating "experiences" yeah great she got outstanding, but its all go go go, and kids need time to chill like fussy elmo says. lets chill a bit for them 13 weeks.