You know you are a childminder when...

[EmmaReed84]

...You get a blister on your middle finger from sharpening too many colouring in pencils...

...You go shopping and the first place you look in the supermarket is the toy aisle...

...You start asking your family to keep their kitchen roll holders so you have enough to make Olympic Torches...

...You have a cupboard full of random things like empty yoghurt pots, boxes, thread, beads, bottles to name but a few things...

...You have more buggies, booster chairs, car seats, than Mothercare...

...You have to count on your fingers before leaving the house to make sure you have all your kiddy winks...(don't wanna pull a Mr Cameron) lol

[gegele]

....when you have spare nappies of at least 3 different size in your car for JUST IN CASE!

...when the said car is ready for picnics, sand castle and muddy puddles with spare stuff everywhere

...when you answer "depends on the day" when asked "how many chldren do you have" during chitchat at a wedding. :blush:

[watgem]

when your clothes are covered in flour paint and glitter, and theres the odd bogey on there too lol, like me today:)

[Bridey]

When you shout out 3 different names before you get the right one :laughing:







Or is that just me? :rolleyes:

[Bridey]

When your doorbell has rung 7 times before 8am!

[Mummits]

...when you have completely given up trying to remember names and call everyone "sweetheart" all the time, even the parents!

[Bridey]

When your dining table looks like an episode of The Waltons!

[loocyloo]

even complete strangers know you by name :blush:

[ziggy]

you're desperate for a glass of red wine at 6pm on a wednesday evening:laughing:

[watgem]

am loving this thread:)

[Bridey]

People stop you in the street to show you their child's rash!

[funemnx]

And yogurt in your hair when you never eat the stuff! :laughing:

(Definately the wine!) ;)

[jumping j]

when you have baby porridge in your hair...even though you don't have a baby

[TooEarlyForGin?]

you always have a tissue handy

[Bridey]

You're sat here looking at the childminding forum instead of washing up.

[Bridey]

Your mug of tea has been microwaved four times before you get to drink it!

[Kimmy050983]

You have a valid excuse to play with the play dough ice cream parlour (at 8pm at night with no children here - need to make sure it works :laughing:):blush:

[wellybelly]

...when you do a school run to three schools, then nip to the doctors and then discover you still have the coat hanger inside your cardigan.:panic::panic::panic:

[loocyloo]

...when you do a school run to three schools, then nip to the doctors and then discover you still have the coat hanger inside your cardigan.:panic::panic::panic:

:laughing::laughing::laughing:

...when you wear your cardigan and raincoat inside out on the school run

[pears]

random children come up to you in the playground and

1, know your name:)

2,want to know when they can come play :)

[jelly15]

When your own teenage children get embrrassed when you give their mates a lift and the childproof locks are still on and the winnie the pooh sunshades are still stuck to the car windows.

[Rubybubbles]

Your mug of tea has been microwaved four times before you get to drink it!

erghh please say you dont do this:panic::laughing:

You feel lost without a pushchair to load everything on

[cathtee]

When you choose Adult ONLY holidays:D

[charleyfarley]

You sing childrens songs walking round the supermarket even though you hve no children with you :blush:

Carol xx

[Mummits]

You go "Ooh look there's a moo-cow" when you are driving along on your own, and then realise you are talking to five EMPTY car seats.

[fluff1975]

When you meet a child and their parent in the street and the child says 'Hello Lucy' whilst the parent looks panic stricken and calls the police. You know the child as they go to your childminder friend, but you've never seen their parent in your life.

[ajs]

When the front of your house looks like a buggy park.

When you're standing in the supermarket rocking your trolley on a day when you haven't got any children

[BucksCM]

When you shout out 3 different names before you get the right one :laughing:







Or is that just me? :rolleyes:

:laughing::laughing: No...been there to!:D

[BucksCM]

People stop you in the street to show you their child's rash!

Really??:eek:

[BucksCM]

You have a valid excuse to play with the play dough ice cream parlour (at 8pm at night with no children here - need to make sure it works :laughing:):blush:

Yep!!:D:thumbsup:

[Becci26]

When you go to the school sports day and instead of cheering on you daughter's house team you spend the whole afternoon cheering on various different children and who all come up to say hello and tell me about their day!

when you can't leave the house without your rucksack containing first aid kit etc, even if you have no children!

When you go to the park and children come up to you saying I'm hungry/ thirsty because you always have a supply of snacks/ water.

When you can't walk through the village anonymously anymore and 'Hi Becci' from children is said 10 times between the school and the park (a few hundred yards away!)

When you have been covered in snot by a crying child within 5 minutes of them arriving!

When your house looks like a small version of toysrus and your own child is 8yrs old!

So many more lol!!!

[jumping j]

when your handbag rivals Mary Poppins'...baby wipes, 3 nappys, apples, grapes, 3 beakers, bottle of milk, 2 dummies, crackers, 3 pens, tissues, nappy sacks, blue tac, paper clips, safety pins, camera, crayons, paper, toy cars, screw driver, hammer....oh and my purse and phone...and it's only 8am!!!:panic:

[dette]

People stop you in the street to show you their child's rash!

I had a dad show me HIS rash last week...on his belly ...eeeeeek.didnt know what to say,and a little bit of sick came up in my mouth :eek:

[Bridey]

When you have a disposable paper towel dispenser in your downstairs loo, together with a sign on the wall telling you to "Wash Your Hands" :laughing:

[EmmaReed84]

When you have 5 hooks in your downstairs loo, together with 5 towels and 5 name cards above each towel and a seperate towel marked "guests"

When you start calling your own children by your mindees name when you are even working.

When know nearly all the charactors to most the TV shows and their presenters.

You like watching Mr Maker yourself and sush the kids so you can get ideas lol

[bunyip]

When your friends don't understand that the BEST thing that happened to you today was when you saw a tractor.
:)

[loocyloo]

When your friends don't understand that the BEST thing that happened to you today was when you saw a tractor.
:)

when the REALLY best thing was that you got to SIT in the tractor :D

oh, and the firemen in the fire engine waved at you ;)

[EmmaReed84]

when the REALLY best thing was that you got to SIT in the tractor :D

oh, and the firemen in the fire engine waved at you ;)

...When you have a great excuse to look at firemen...

...And an even better excuse to visit the fire station and invite one round to your house to "inspect it" :laughing: (:eek: and I am a married woman:D)

[Trouble]

when you have a rare day off and people ask you where all your children are !!!!

[EmmaReed84]

When you get paid for sitting on your :censored: all day and have the easiest job in the world :rolleyes:

[charleyfarley]

when you have a rare day off and people ask you where all your children are !!!!:thumbsup:

Yep and when you don't have a pushchair with you because you seemed permanentally attached people ask have you forgotten something :rolleyes:

Getting excited over new resources :laughing::laughing:


Carol xx

[mindingmummy]

random children come up to you in the playground and

1, know your name:)

2,want to know when they can come play :)

3. come and give you a hug even though you dont know them....but they know you!

[cas2805]

a mum in the school playground comes up and asks for a wet wipe as "Childminder's always have wet wipes!"

when your house looks like a toyshop, so when DS's birthday you get the "oh he has everything already!" comment.

when you can smell a poo and you know who has done it with out even checking their nappy!

[nipper]

When my new mindee's daddy picks her up from school as he has finshed work early and she comes running to me. I point out that Daddy is here and she goes home sobbing...RESULT!

The raised eyebrows and looks of horror I get from total strangers in the doctors surgery when I turn up with a double buggy containing 19month and 13 month old, a 2.5 yr old and...my own ds aged 8. I can just here it..."Blimey, she's been busy."

When I have to explain that the two in the pushchair are NOT twins...come on, I mean one has ginger hair and the other has brown hair!

I have a joke with the Head teacher as I walk into the playground with my P&T.
HT "Here comes the bus, how many do we have today?"
Me "There are three more under the covers, but don't tell Ofsted."

[nipper]

:

Yep and when you don't have a pushchair with you because you seemed permanentally attached people ask have you forgotten something :rolleyes:


Bizarrely though that would be my worst nightmare. How sad is that?

[Kimmy050983]

When my new mindee's daddy picks her up from school as he has finshed work early and she comes running to me. I point out that Daddy is here and she goes home sobbing...RESULT!

The raised eyebrows and looks of horror I get from total strangers in the doctors surgery when I turn up with a double buggy containing 19month and 13 month old, a 2.5 yr old and...my own ds aged 8. I can just here it..."Blimey, she's been busy."

When I have to explain that the two in the pushchair are NOT twins...come on, I mean one has ginger hair and the other has brown hair!

I have a joke with the Head teacher as I walk into the playground with my P&T.
HT "Here comes the bus, how many do we have today?"
Me "There are three more under the covers, but don't tell Ofsted."

:laughing:
I was asked the other day whilst walking with my ds (3.5 and tall) and my 2 mindees (18 months) : "ohhh are they triplets??" :laughing::laughing:
First of all they all look completely different and jamie is much much taller than the mindees :laughing:

[nipper]

Kimmy, I think people try to make polite conversation with us, but end up making totally stupid comments like that. My worst nightmare is taking my double buggy
in lifts, especially if there are old people in there as well.:panic::rolleyes::laughing:

[Kimmy050983]

I was thinking of getting some t-shirts printed:

"no these are not all mine - I am a childminder!" :clapping: - and i don't even have that many mindees lol

[oxfordshirecm]

a mum in the school playground comes up and asks for a wet wipe as "Childminder's always have wet wipes!"

when your house looks like a toyshop, so when DS's birthday you get the "oh he has everything already!" comment.

when you can smell a poo and you know who has done it with out even checking their nappy!

Haha my OH likes to test me when he can smell poo as he can't actually believe I can smell the differences between them all :)

[Monkey26]

When you are childless, in a same sex relationship, but have a whole downstairs room dedicated as a playroom and are just about to fork out to have the front garden block paved so the children can have all weather outside play...!!!

When you are childless but own an 8 seater people carrier...!!!

When you go to your second job as a nurse at the local hospital and a patient says "hey, you're that childminder from xx school"...!!!

When you are cooking evening meals for you and your partner but decide to batch cook ready for the week ahead with the kids but then go to freeze them to find out the freezer is already chocca with blitzed tom/veg sauces etc...!!!

:D xx

[charleyfarley]

Pushing an empty double pushchair back from the school run due to the los being collected on the way :thumbsup:

Carol xx

[Tatjana]

When you work for free, as who would think to pay the childminder?!:laughing::laughing::laughing:

[loocyloo]

when you go to an open evening at the local secondary school and a teacher (you've never met or seen before) asks if you have any vacancies :laughing:

( i do mind the children of a different teacher at the school ;) )

[primula]

When no one recognises you without the double buggy!!

[Becci26]

Pushing an empty double pushchair back from the school run due to the los being collected on the way :thumbsup:

Carol xx

:thumbsup:

Or Taking an empty double buggy on the school/ playschool run because you are picking up on the way.

The amount of comments I get about this!! :thumbsup:

[Ballette]

Really liking this thread! ;)

[charleyfarley]

Neighbours knock on your door knowing you'll have a first aid box.

And parents at school coming to you when their lo has fell over.

Carol xx

[kel1983]

Mindee knock on our door on the days their mum collect from school to use the toilet. They cant hold it for 2 more minutes until they get to their own house :angry:

[lyla's mum]

when you have a rare day off and people ask you where all your children are !!!!

definitely this! had a very rare day off this week, took dd to get her hair cut and the hairdresser said 'don't you normally have a few more children with you?!' we walk past every wednesday on the way to a toddler group!

[smurfette]

When you go to a funeral and realise when you get there you have a potty in the front seat well,. hope nobody looks for a lift!

[ziggy]

you go out on a lunch date with a new man and as you're leaving the restaurant you say to him, "do you need a wee before we drive home?":blush:

[EmmaReed84]

you go out on a lunch date with a new man and as you're leaving the restaurant you say to him, "do you need a wee before we drive home?":blush:

:laughing: :laughing: :laughing: This made me nearly wee myself... and my toilet is 3 feet away :eek:

[EmmaReed84]

You offer to give people a lift to an evening event and when you get to their house you realise you left the car seats in and it take you 15 minutes taking out 3 car seats and 3 booster seats and clog up their hallway :blush:

[TooEarlyForGin?]

Going to the toilet becomes an event, with at least 3 small children and the dog (in my case) all in with you.

[BucksCM]

Neighbours knock on your door knowing you'll have a first aid box.

And parents at school coming to you when their lo has fell over.

Carol xx

YES!!!:laughing:
Mum lives two doors down...why have you come to me...I know you'll have plasters!

[foxy lady]

you cant have a birthday party for your own son on a Friday afternoon without worrying about weather it will be OK with Ofsted:panic:

[hectors house]

When there is delicious left over tuna pasta bake in the dish and your husband thinks he is going to take it to work for lunch for the next day and you say "no that is the mindees lunch for tomorrow", and pop it in kids bowls in fridge!

[nipper]

you go out on a lunch date with a new man and as you're leaving the restaurant you say to him, "do you need a wee before we drive home?":blush: or take your shoes off and leave them there please. Can you take them off yourself?

Love this one!

Love this thread, it's becoming really addictive.

[nipper]

Tesco are delivering your weekly shop and the van driver notices your certificates by the door...what's this then he says and there then ensues a ten minute conversation about exactly what a childminder does...:yawning:

[cathtee]

When you put your hand in a coat pocket you haven't worn recently and find a dummy that belongs to a lo that doesn't have them anymore:)

[TooEarlyForGin?]

Friends and relatives with kids who come to visit, don't bother to bring anything as they know you have everything they might need.

[Carol M]

When your near neighbours come and knock on your door to ask advice on first aid treatment but they use the local private nursery for regular childcare! And they ask to borrow a buggy or a car seat cos other parent gone off with them in car!!
Carol :(

[caz3007]

Pushing an empty double pushchair back from the school run due to the los being collected on the way :thumbsup:

Carol xx

When your double buggy is empty of children cos you have handed them over at the school but full of coats, lunchboxes and reading folders for the next shift :laughing:

[melco]

When you have kids lined up by the front door in the morning so that you can apply suncream.

When you see someone 2 days in a row and they double take as if to say "thats not the same child that was in the buggy yesterday!":eek:

When friends have a party for their own children but then expect you to take over and deal with children!! The cheek of it!!

Also always having a first aid kit at the ready and it never being my kids or mindees hurt, always somebody elses child!

[pipandbaz]

When you find yourself counting out loud the cups of tea your making for visitors without a child in sight!

[caz3007]

Also always having a first aid kit at the ready and it never being my kids or mindees hurt, always somebody elses child!

I have given out many a plaster and antiseptic wipe on days out with just my son, no mindies...lol

[Donkey]

When you have kids lined up by the front door in the morning so that you can apply suncream.

When you see someone 2 days in a row and they double take as if to say "thats not the same child that was in the buggy yesterday!":eek:

When friends have a party for their own children but then expect you to take over and deal with children!! The cheek of it!!

Also always having a first aid kit at the ready and it never being my kids or mindees hurt, always somebody elses child!


yep pretty sure I get invited to parties for that reason!!!


when tesco delivery man comments that he was only last here 2 days ago

:blush::blush::blush::blush:

[ajs]

I know I get invited to parties for the same reason, but I am wise to it. I don't get involved any more I sit back and let the parents look after their own children and I enjoy the food and drink on offer

[Monkey26]

Just realised another... When your phone and iPad automatically change e.y.f.s (without the dots!) to EYFS :laughing:

[miss mopple]

When you go to have a shower and have to tip the contents of the sand pit out your bra first

[loocyloo]

when you get asked to be the named first aider at the school fair.

[Lems]

I'm chuckling at these replies:laughing:

[charleyfarley]

I know I get invited to parties for the same reason, but I am wise to it. I don't get involved any more I sit back and let the parents look after their own children and I enjoy the food and drink on offer

Snap!!!! :thumbsup:

Carol xx

[kimlouise25]

Going to the toilet becomes an event, with at least 3 small children and the dog (in my case) all in with you.

You don't bother shutting the door on the toilet anymore!!

[Lady Haha]

when you buy a ticket for the school play which has six different classes performing a different piece each and you have at least one child in every single class waving at you from the stage!:) oh and your own child isn't even in the play......

When you need to do a headcount at school pick up before setting off home.

When your garden is starting to rival Alton Towers.

When you go to strap your mum in the car.

[md0u0131]

When you take your own child for a very rare McDonalds and sit in fear in case anyone recognises you and thinks you offer happy meals as part of your healthy eating policy.

[cathtee]

When you go to have a shower and have to tip the contents of the sand pit out your bra first

love it:laughing::laughing:

[migimoo]

love,love,loving these...am chuckling away at the table much to hubby's annoyance!

When you get to rhymetime at your local library-usual librarian off sick and all the mums go "oooh,Tracy can do it instead!!!" while you try to sneak out the back!

[migimoo]

....and when your meals arrive at a restaurant when you're mid conversation you automatically start cutting up your 13yr old DD's food...."seriously,that is SO not cool mum!"

[lisa1968]

When your doorbell has rung 7 times before 8am!

I keep saying I'm going to put a revolving door on the front of the house!!:laughing:

[Kiddleywinks]

When you spend far too much time on here laughing and knowing you're not the only one that's done x after all :laughing::laughing::thumbsup:

[Rebecca Foster]

.....When it gets to 5pm and cant rememer the last time you ate.:panic::panic:

.....Every where you go, people know your name

[karensmart4]

When you're on a adults only holiday and you pull a pack of wet wipes out of your bag... :panic: